The BTT's Awesome Guide to Parenting
by PsychotiCaptain
Summary: Spain, France, and Prussia are going to teach you all about the most awesome ways to raise a child, with the help of some friends, of course. Rated T for cursing and France.
1. Introduction

**[EDIT]**

******Okay, I think a lot of people are rage quitting on this fic because they think Canada isn't in it. Well, I have some news: HE IS! He comes in later on, in chapter four, but I promise little Mattie is here~ How could I forget him?**

**Anywho, now that that's out of the way, enjoy!**

* * *

Prussia, France, and Spain were chilling in a certain (very pissed) Brit's living room.

"Why are you lot here again?" England questioned, still unsure as to why three of his least favorite countries were lounging around in his house.

"Angleterre, we told you, we're making a guide to parenting and we want you to be a part of it!"

"Yes, yes, I understand all that rubbish. What I don't understand is why you had to come over and couldn't, oh, I don't know, invite me over to one of your goddamn houses!"

Spain looked injured. "You don't have to be rude, Inglaterra. We came over because your house is the biggest, and there will be more room for the tomates to play~"

"They're children, you git, not tomatoes!" Turning to Prussia, he asked, "Why haven't you said anything?"

As it turned out, the nation had fallen asleep. He woke up with a start and sat up, looking around as if to remember where he was. "Where's West?"

The four senior nations froze when they realized that, amidst all of England's yelling, Romano, Germany, Seychelles, and America had mysteriously disappeared.

"Ay! We lost the tomates!" Spain cried, springing up from the sofa.

France groaned. "My boss is going to murder me!"

Prussia (awesomely) jumped off the armchair where he'd fallen asleep and opened the door to the bathroom, poking his head in to confirm that the kids weren't in there.

He returned to the other three nations and pulled a map of England's house out.

"Why the bloody hell are you carrying around a complete floor plan of my house in your pocket?!"

Ignoring England's question, Prussia uncapped a Sharpie and split the house up into four parts. "Okay, here's the plan. Francey-pants, you take this part of the house." He circled the top left quadrant. "Toni, you take the top right corner." He placed a star in said quadrant. "Eyebrows." England frowned at the nickname, but Prussia didn't notice. "You take the bottom left part. The awesome me will handle the last quadrant."

France studied the map, then laughed creepily. "Ohonhonhon~ I get the quadrant with Angleterre's bedroom~"

Spain kicked him in the shin. "Amigo, you can look through England's personal possessions some other time. Right now, we must find los tomates."

They split up, going to search the parts of the house Prussia had assigned them. They stopped looking when they heard Prussia call from downstairs.

"MEIN GOTT!"

The three of them ran down the stairs, finding an angry Prussia gaping at four flour-covered children in the kitchen. The white stuff was everywhere, and the empty sack was covering Germany's head. Romano was scooping the flour up into piles and kicking it, giggling as it scattered everywhere and repeating the process. Seychelles and America were attempting to make flour-castles. They're like sandcastles, but with flour.

When the four of them (excluding Germany) saw their elder nations come in, they all reacted very differently. Romano cupped some flour in his hands and threw it at Spain's face. Seychelles ran to give France a powdery hug. Germany peeked out from under the sack of flour, but quickly replaced it when he saw Prussia, hoping his older brother wouldn't notice him. America's expression automatically turned to one of guilt, and he ran to hide in the pantry shouting, "Seychelles made me do it!"

"I think," Spain said, shaking flour out of his hair. "That, if only for our own sakes, we should start this guide. NOW."

The other three (even England) nodded in agreement.


	2. Mornings

After the flour incident was over and everything was cleaned up, the eight nations voted as to whether or not they would all spend the night at England's house. As it turned out, there was a 7-1 decision that they would, much to England's chagrin.

Prussia and France made certain that every powdery/liquid/potentially problematic substance was at least three feet off the ground, so no little hands could reach them. England was keeping a close watch on the children, who were playing duck-duck-goose in the living room. Spain was taking a siesta.

"I still don't know why this has to be in my house," the Englishman huffed as Prussia and France came out of the kitchen.

"Fine. We'll leave after tonight, Angleterre. But you must come with us~"

England rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

* * *

As it were, the little nations didn't fall asleep until three in the morning, long after all the caffeine in the house had been consumed by their older brothers.

Seychelles and America had apparently grown fond of each other, causing France to make a remark about him and England becoming brothers and resulting in the Frenchie obtaining quite an outstanding black eye.

Romano was bullying Germany, though it didn't seem Germany really knew what was going on.

Eventually, the little Italian boy got bored and fell asleep hugging Spain's legs, mumbling about tomatoes, pasta, and bastards. Seychelles and America were playing hide-and-seek, but America had discovered Seychelles fast asleep in a laundry hamper. Germany simply climbed onto Prussia's lap and fell asleep.

To get America to finally sleep, England had to threaten to ban hamburgers and comic books for a week. France, Spain, and Prussia carried the sleeping Seychelles, Romano, and Germany into America's bedroom. The other three elder nations had to kick France multiple times to prevent him from putting all four of the little nations in the same bed.

Prussia slept on the armchair, Spain took the sofa, and they locked France in the guest room. For a while, the house was actually quiet.

And then three hours passed.

All four kids were wide awake by six o'clock. Romano was the first downstairs, running over to the sofa and jumping on Spain, yelling, "Wake up, tomato bastard!"

Seychelles started crying when she couldn't find France, and England had to calm her down.

America had found the superhero cape that England had hidden and was currently running around in his Spiderman pajamas screaming, "I'm Batman!"

Germany wasn't really doing anything, just eating some wurst that he'd seemingly conjured out of nowhere.

After a lot of running and yelling (and threatening on England's part), they managed to get all four kids into the kitchen for breakfast. England was about to start cooking, but the other nations wouldn't let him, so France took over.

While they waited, the kids made up a game where they shared the worst words they knew.

"Um...the worst word I know is..." Seychelles thought for a moment. "Cookie!"

America and Romano burst out laughing. Germany smiled.

"The worst word I know is..." America trailed off and England looked worried for a moment. "Puppy!"

Seychelles giggled and America blushed. Then it was Romano's turn.

"The worst word I know is fu-" The boy was cut off by Spain covering his mouth.

"I think that's enough of that game," Spain said, chuckling nervously. To France, he called, "How's the food coming, amigo? Need help?" He tightened his grip on Romano's mouth as the stubborn Italian started fighting, but he had to let go when Romano bit his index finger.

"Ay!" he yelped, cradling his finger. "That's not nice, Lovi!"

"Serves you right, bastard," Romano snapped. "And don't call me Lovi!"

France came over and put eight plates of food on the table, then sat down next to Seychelles, who proceeded to tug on his sleeve. "France?"

"Oui, ma chérie?"

She frantically motioned to him that she had a secret, and he leaned down to listen.

"What does 'bastard' mean?" she whispered, looking up at him with curious brown eyes.

"I'll tell you when you're older, chérie."

The girl stuck her lip out, but went back to eating a slice of toast.

For a few minutes, things were peaceful. America was busy gnawing on a hamburger, Germany was quietly eating a sausage, Romano was plowing through a pile of tomatoes, and Seychelles was still eating her toast. Then Spain tried to take one of Romano's tomatoes, and all hell broke loose, to say the least.

Romano was so mad, he started cursing and pelting tomatoes at Spain. America laughed and splashed some Coke in England's face. Prussia accidentally knocked over his beer, and it spilled all over the table, soaking everyone who was seated there. Seychelles dropped her toast and started crying, not even being comforted when France picked her up and tried to calm her down. Through all of the chaos, Germany just sat there eating his sausage.

Later...

"This is the second time we're cleaning this kitchen in less than twenty-four hours," France moaned, wiping tomato guts off the window.

Spain sighed as he mopped the floor. "At least now los niños are asleep."

"Cleaning is so unawesome," Prussia complained, crawling under the table and picking up all the food that was scattered on the floor.

England would've banged his head into a wall if they weren't all covered in mushed tomatoes. "I bloody hate mornings."


	3. Pokémon

England and America were going over to China's house so America and Japan could play together. China and England weren't exactly the best of friends, but they could put up with each other for the sake of their little brothers, and America and Japan enjoyed playing video games together.

When they got to China's house, England rang the doorbell. Taiwan answered the door, looking bashfully at America before scurrying away to find her brother. China entered the doorway a few second later, holding Japan's hand.

"Hello, England," he greeted the European country with a nod and kneeled down, smiling as he held his covered hand out to America. "Nihao, America. It's been a while, huh?"

America stared in awe at the ancient country's hidden hand. He put both hands in his palm and lifted up the sleeves a bit. "Where're your hands?" he asked in wonder, peeking underneath the fabric.

China laughed and ruffled the little nation's hair, standing up and moving out of the way to allow his guests in.

America put his arm around Japan and started chattering away, talking about all his latest virtual accomplishments.

"Yeah, dude! I caught Suicune with a Great Ball! How badass is that?!"

Japan's face remained expressionless as he quietly said, "I caught it with a Pokéball."

America stopped walking, his mouth hanging open in astonishment. "Seriously? Dude, you've gotta teach me how to do that!"

The corner of Japan's lip curled into a slight smile, and he leaned over to whisper something in America's ear. China and England looked at the two children with growing curiosity, a bad feeling sitting in both of their stomachs.

Japan and America turned to them, adorably innocent masks hiding the plan they had developed.

America walked over and tugged on England's shirt sleeve, looking up at him with pleading blue eyes. "England, will you do something for me? Please?"

England couldn't resist America's cuteness. "Alright, love. What is it?"

America signaled for him to lean down and started whispering the plan in his ear.

Something similar went on between Japan and China. Japan toddled over to China and asked him to pick him up. When the older country had done so, Japan started playing with his hair, and China playfully swatted his hand away.

"Stop that, xiao yi!" he chastised.

Japan looked at him, his head tilted slightly to one side, and asked, "Onii-sama, would you help me and America with something?"

China smiled at his little brother and nodded, bouncing him gently as the boy filled him in as well.

Here was their plan: Japan and America wanted to play real-life Pokémon, and they were asking China and England to dress up as whichever Pokémon they wanted, but China would be on America's team and England would be on Japan's team.

China ended up dressed as a Pikachu. England was a Charizard. Unsurprisingly, Japan had both a Red cosplay and a Blue cosplay. He gave America the Red one and they went outside and painted lines in the grass to use as their "arena". Taiwan, South Korea, and Hong Kong came outside to watch.

Japan and America stood on either side of the Pokéball they'd painted in the grass, staring each other down. England and China were behind them, looking both amused and angry at the same time.

"Japan!" America called. "I challenge you to a Pokémon battle!"

Japan clutched the toy Pokéball in his hand. "I accept your challenge!"

America nodded and pulled the tip of his hat down, shouting, "China! I choose you!" and throwing his Pokéball. China happily pranced onto the field, crying, "Pika pii!"

Japan tossed his Pokéball and yelled, "England! Go!"

As much as he hated to admit it, England was having fun. He ran onto the field and spread out his wings, roaring, "CHAR!"

China bared his teeth, and England growled. America and Japan were surprised at how immersed their brothers were in the game, but they weren't complaining.

"China, use Thunderbolt!" America ordered.

"Pika..." China mumbled, gathering electricity around him, to everyone else's (except England) surprise. "CHU!"

A bolt of electricity flew from the ancient nation and hit England square in the shoulder. The little countries stood aghast, shocked that China could actually do that. However, England was fully aware of the capabilities of a strong nation, because he had some hidden talents as well.

Japan managed to regain his senses in time to tell England what to do. "England, use Flamethrower!"

To this day, America wonders how the hell England managed to a) Blast fire from his mouth and b) Not burn his tongue while doing so. Nevertheless, it was clear that the childish battle had become something more intense.

China had dodged the attack to some extent, still charring the end of his tail. But he turned towards England, his painted cheeks crackling with electricity.

"China, use Agility!" America commanded. Within a timespan of five seconds, there were Chinas all around the circumference of the makeshift arena.

England looked around, trying to find the real one as Japan shouted, "England, use Fly!"

The Charizard/England performed another miracle, taking flight so that he looked like another bird in the sky. America let out a squeal and said, "Whoa, dude, Britain! You've gotta teach me how to do that!"

Japan smirked and threw a stuffed panda in the center of the fight. Instantly, the extra Chinas disappeared and the real one cried, "Panda!" and bounded over to the plushie.

"England, go!" Japan ordered, and England flew down to where China was, slamming down in front of him and sending the Asian nation flying, still holding the panda. China landed on the ground with a thud, his eyes swirling just like in the anime. South Korea jumped into the middle of the arena and declared, "Japan and England win, da-ze!"

Taiwan and Hong Kong clapped while America threw his hat down and ran over to China, Japan not far behind.

"China? Dude, you okay?"

China sat up and smiled, taking off his Pikachu ears. "Of course. It's all for show."

England came up behind them, holding his detached wings. "Did you two have fun?"

Japan and America nodded enthusiastically and gave each other a high five. China winked and gave England a thumbs-up, mouthing, 'Great plan.'

China picked Japan up, and the little country fell right asleep in his arms. America stumbled and fell, also entering his dreamworld right where he hit the ground. England scooped him up and carried him to the door.

"Good idea, Brit," China passive-aggressively commended England. "The little ones had fun."

England smiled and nodded, saying goodbye to China and walking out the door.

He'd walked about ten yards when America suddenly woke up, fire blazing in his eyes. "It was all for show?!"

England looked down at him and smiled, ruffling his hair and only making him angrier. "Of course it was, love. But I'll tell you a secret, if you want to hear it."

America's eyes widened and he nodded so hard his neck should have snapped.

England whispered, "I can actually fly."

The little boy looked up at him with wonder-filled eyes. "Seriously?"

England nodded. "Yup. And I'll show you one day, when you're a little older."

America giggled, and England lifted him up onto his shoulders, tickling his sides as the two sang the Pokémon theme song all the way home.

* * *

**I just realized that this chapter doesn't even have the BTT in it, but that's okay, because ****China and Japan get an epic entrance. And isn't England such a good older brother?**


	4. Superheroes

Spain, England, France, Prussia, Hungary, and China all had a world meeting to go to, so they had (very unwisely) left Romano, America, Canada, Seychelles, Germany, Veneziano, and Japan alone in Spain's house, trusting in Canada and Japan to keep the peace.

Of course, there are several problems to such logic.

**1) North and South Italy are in the same household.**

**2) South Italy and Germany are in the same household.**

**3) Canada's too quiet to speak up against anyone.**

**4) America's excellent at manipulating people.**

So, in case it wasn't obvious, the entire situation was destined to turn out against the guardians.

It all started...as soon as the older nations walked out the door. America climbed up on the dining room table and called together an assembly of sorts.

"Listen to me in my total hero voice, guys!"

The other little countries gathered around the table and looked up at him.

"We're gonna play superheroes! Any objections and I trash the house and tell Spain it was all your fault!"

"Hey! That's blackmail!" Germany objected.

"Yup. And Japan's hair is black. What's your point, dude?"

Japan raised his hand shyly. "Um, what heroes will we be?"

America scoffed, as if the question was pointless. "Obviously, I'm going to be Captain America. Who wants to be Spider-Man?"

The end verdict was as follows: Romano was going to be Batman, Italy would be Spider-Man, Germany would be the Hulk, Canada would be Thor, Japan would be Iron Man, and Seychelles was going to be Super Girl.

As Japan had Pokémon cosplays, America managed to conjure up some superhero cosplays for him and his friends to use.

"Wow!" Italy gaped at himself in a mirror. "We look so cool~! Look, Germany! I'm like a spider!"

America climbed back onto the dining table, pulling his mask over his face.

"Alright, dudes! Let's fight for the AMERICAN WAY! We'll overcook evil on the grill of justice, and throw it away in the trash can of humanity!"

"That's the worst metaphor ever," Romano remarked.

Seychelles raised her hand. "So...now what do we do?"

America clutched his shield and grinned. "We're going to find evil to vanquish!"

Canada spoke up (for once). "Um, shouldn't we-"

"Let's go, Team USA!" America shouted, cutting his brother off mid-sentence.

"I think we should be Team Italia," Italy and Romano offered simultaneously.

"I like Team Canada..."

"The Deutsch Squad!"

"The SOS Brigade."

"Why does it matter?" Seychelles scoffed, glaring at them, and immediately silencing them.

"Fine, we can be Team USA," Romano muttered unhappily.

America ran to a tree in Spain's enormous yard, shouting, "'MERICAN PRIDE!" and some other things that would've earned him a sound thrashing from England. Italy scampered after him happily, crying, "Pasta~!" The other nations trudged behind.

America climbed the tree and surveyed the area, gesturing for the others to follow when he was satisfied.

"Let's all fight for the American way!"

"You're the only damn American here!" Romano snapped.

"And I'm Captain America! So you've all gotta do what I say, 'cause I'm the Captain!"

You could practically see the anger seething from Germany, Romano, and Seychelles, but Canada and Italy were having fun. Japan didn't care either way.

"Now, we have to go vanquish evil!"

He climbed to the very top of the tree and got ready to jump. The narrow branch bent sharply beneath him, and Canada warned, "Be careful!" Not that anyone heard him, but he said it.

"Wait!" Germany yelled. "Captain America can't fly, you dummkopf!"

But it was too late. America jumped and hit the ground...right as the older countries pulled into the driveway.

England had a hell of a time explaining to the doctors why America's humerus was looking...well, not very humorous at all.


	5. Grocery Shopping

It was time for lunch, and Prussia went to check the pantry to see what he had to give Germany. Much to his horror, they were out of sausages, though why he kept his sausages in the pantry remains a mystery to all.

"West! We're going grocery shopping!" he called, and Germany toddled into the kitchen.

"Is this going to be like last time?" the little boy asked skeptically.

"No, I promise France isn't coming this time."

Just then, the doorbell rang. Prussia went to answer and opened the door to find none other than Hungary standing on his doorstep, holding a completely spaced-out Italy.

A slight blush rose to the nation's cheeks. He'd never admit it, because he's too awesome for love, but he had (*cough*has*cough*) a crush on Hungary.

"Liza? What are you doing here?"

A thought occurred to him, and he crossed his arms in defense, forming an X in front of him.

"If you're here to beat me up again, I'm not home!"

Hungary rolled her eyes and shifted Italy in her arms. "Calm down, hülye. I don't even have the frying pan, so chill out. I just came to ask for some flour. We're baking a cake."

Prussia crossed his arms and huffed. "Actually, we're out of everything. We were going grocery shopping. Wanna come? I'll give you some flour when we're done."

"Ve~ Can we go, Hungary?" Italy begged, poking her shoulder. "Please?"

Hungary took the little copper-haired nation's hand and smiled. "Of course we can go."

Prussia smiled as Germany came to the door. Italy leapt out of Hungary's arms crying, "Yay! Germany!" and glomping the latter, resulting in a fierce blush on Germany's end.

"H-Hello, Italy," he gasped. "You're...um, you're killing me."

Italy released him and smiled. "Oh, sorry!"

Prussia rubbed the back of his head. "Let's just go."

Hungary held Italy's hand as they walked down the sidewalk, and Italy clutched Germany's hand tightly in turn. Prussia walked beside Germany as a sort of bodyguard, making sure neither of the little boys wandered away.

When they reached the grocery store, they got a cart and sat Germany and Italy down in it. They made their way around the store, getting what they needed and then some.

They rounded the dairy aisle to find Switzerland bent over the cheeses, muttering to himself about money. Liechtenstein sat behind him in a cart, sucking her thumb and looking at him curiously. When she saw them, her eyes widened and she tugged on her brother's shirt.

"Bruder, look! It's Miss Hungary and Mister Prussia and Italy and Germany!"

Switzerland stood up straight and gently lowered his sister's outstretched index finger. "Lilli, it's not nice to point."

She smiled shyly. "Sorry. But can I go with them? Please?"

He caught Hungary's eye and nodded in greeting. "Hello, Liza. How are you?"

Hungary smiled at Switzerland's need to look polite in front of his sister. "I'm fine, thank you, Vash." She leaned down so she was eye-level with Liechtenstein. "Did you want to come with us, Lilli?"

Liechtenstein looked up at Switzerland questioningly. "Big Bruder? Can I, please?"

Switzerland sighed, unable to resist his little sister's adorableness. "Okay." Looking at Hungary, he asked, "Can you bring her home later?"

If you asked him, he'd deny it, but Hungary was one of the few nations he trusted, and it took a crapload of trust to get Switzerland to willingly put Liechtenstein in your care.

Hungary nodded and lifted Liechtenstein out of the cart. "Do you want to say bye to your brother?"

Liechtenstein nodded and leaned over, giving her brother a big hug and waving cheerily before Hungary carried her away.

Italy was moved into the basket of the cart, much to his apparent enjoyment, and Liechtenstein happily sat next to Germany, swinging her legs with contentment.

They finished up their shopping with Hungary giving minimal injuries to Prussia, and everything seemed to be going okay (for once).

Prussia bought each child candy, and they walked out of the store with Liechtenstein quietly sucking on one of those enormous rainbow lollipops, Germany popping sour Skittles in his mouth, and Italy stuffing his face with chocolate.

"Ve~ Hungary, can we get ice cream?" Italy asked the second he'd finished his chocolate.

Hungary ruffled his hair. "Buta fiú, you just had a chocolate bar! You'll get chubby if you eat more sweets!" She tickled his stomach, smiling when he giggled.

"Aw, Hungary!" Italy attempted a pout through the laughter. "I'm sure Lilli wants some ice cream, and Luddy too!"

"I don't think so, Italy," Prussia said, suddenly becoming an un-Prussia-like responsible big brother. "We haven't had lunch yet, you and Hungary have a cake to bake, and we have to get Liechtenstein back to Switzy before he flips out."

Italy's face fell, but he said nothing as they walked back to Prussia's house. On the way, they ran into England and America, whose left arm was in a blue cast from a previous superhero-related incident.

"Hello, Prussia, Hungary," England greeted, nodding in their direction. America waved with his intact arm and held up a Sharpie.

"Will you guys sign my cast?"

"Of course, America," Hungary said, smiling and taking the marker from him. She signed her name neatly and wrote "Get Better Soon!" before reluctantly giving the marker to Prussia, who wrote "The Awesome Me was here!"

Germany and Liechtenstein signed their name in that adorably sloppy way that little kids write, and Italy was handed the marker last. He leaned over a bit too far...

...and tipped the cart over. Prussia, Hungary, and England managed to catch the three kids, but the groceries rolled down the sidewalk and out onto the road. The flour bag split open, the cookies Germany had insisted on buying spilled out of the package, and, in the end, the only thing they could save was the new frying pan Hungary had purchased.

Italy started crying and hiccuping and blaming himself, but Hungary picked him up and calmed him down. Germany, Liechtenstein, Prussia, America, and England helped clean the mess.

"Well," England remarked, patting Prussia's shoulder sympathetically when they were done, "it could've been worse."

Prussia nodded grimly as England and America bid them farewell and left. Hungary offered to go buy more groceries, but Prussia told her it was fine, and she left to take Liechtenstein home.

He scooped Germany up and the two made a record-breaking second trip to the grocery store, getting back home in less ten minutes with a significantly lower amount of items, just sufficient enough for the rest of the day.

At home, Prussia quickly gave Germany lunch and set him down for a nap before going to the kitchen to put whatever he'd bought away.

He opened the fridge to put away a carton of milk and found the appliance stocked full of food, everything he thought had been in the pantry.

Even France, Spain, and ten bottles of beer had trouble cheering him up that night.

* * *

**W00T! It's Hungary!**


	6. Naptime-Part 1

It was two o'clock in the afternoon, and England was really regretting allowing America to have a Mountain Dew with lunch.

As of that moment, the boy was wearing nothing but Superman boxers, a matching cape, roller skates, England's old tricorne, an eyepatch, and a toy hook. He was also standing at the top of the stairs, his arm miraculously healed since last chapter.

"Alfred F. Jones, get your sorry little arse down here this instant!" England called menacingly.

America stuck his tongue out at England and held his hands up to his eyebrows to mock him. "Or what?"

England grinned rather frighteningly and replied, "Or else I summon the ghosts."

America froze and looked down, sheer terror shining in his blue eyes. "You wouldn't."

Waving his spellbook, England nodded. "Try me."

Defeated, America took off the cape, hook, roller skates, tricorne, and eyepatch and trudged down the stairs, hanging his head.

He deposited the accessories in England's outstretched hands and looked up at him, pouting.

"Go lie down," England ordered, pointing to America's room. "And for God's sake, put some clothes on, child."

America shuffled away, still pouting, looking back once and asking, "Tell me a story?"

England nodded and offered an apologetic smile to his little colony. He dropped America's toys in his toybox and placed his tricorne back in its spot in the back of his closet.

_How did he get that in the first place...?_

He walked across the house to America's room to find the little country had actually obeyed him (for once) and was patiently waiting for his story.

England pulled up a chair next to America's bed and tickled the boy, as if to apologize for before. America giggled and squirmed like every child does when they're being tickled.

"What story do you want to hear?" he asked.

"One about pirates! Oh, and mermaids!"

So England told him a wonderful tale about the demon Captain Carriedo and the wonderfully brave and handsome Captain Kirkland and how they fought over a mermaid's pearl that would grant them eternal fame and fortune, and America, who didn't know Spain or England's human name, crashed from the caffeine and fell asleep right away.

England tiptoed out of the room and quietly shut the door behind him, heading downstairs and picking up a well-read copy of Sense and Sensibility before going into the kitchen and making himself a cup of tea.

He settled down in his armchair, fully intending to use whatever free time he had to attempt to keep himself sane. And face it, if you had a Chibimerica in your care, you'd be doing the same thing.

Unfortunately, his peace was short-lived, as it had been barely half and hour when England heard America's door fling open, followed by the pattering footsteps of the little blonde.

Before he knew what was happening, America was curled up on his lap, sobbing into his shirt. He picked up the child and patted his back, leaning his head gently on America's.

"Come now, love, what's the matter? You're acting like it's the end of the world. Did you have a nightmare?"

America looked up at him and nodded, hiccuping softly. "There was..." He buried his head back into England's shoulder and started crying again. England patted his back soothingly until he stopped.

When America had finally decided to stop crying, he sat on England's lap and sucked his thumb quietly while watching Captain America for what must have been the millionth time.

England, on the other hand, had a pounding headache and had run out of tea, two things that, when mixed with your average bushy-browed Brit, result in one thing.

So, while America watched his idol punch Hitler again and again, England took the role of the child rather than the guardian and took a nap.

* * *

**I feel your pain, England...**

**But hey, if we just gave everyone a Chibimerica when they were feeling sad, I'm sure the world would be a ****_much_**** happier place.**


	7. Naptime-Part 2

China wondered how the hell he was still sane.

It was naptime for his precious little nations, and the precious little nations did not want to nap.

"Ha! Naps are for pansies, da-ze!" South Korea yelled, running around the house in nothing but his underwear and shouting obscene remarks at his other siblings.

Taiwan was studying Hong Kong's palm intently, her eyebrows knitted together in intense concentration.

Japan, Vietnam, and Thailand were playing MarioKart64, blasting the volume so that the whole house rumbled with every turn.

China, wanted nothing more but to collapse and take a nap himself, but he disregarded that as wishful thinking and focused on getting the six children to sleep.

Taiwan had begun explaining Hong Kong's entire future to him, going into great detail about how a giant panda was going to come with an octopus on his head and tell him to go steal a magical feather from the great sea-phoenix of blueness.

China knelt down next to them and smiled. "Taiwan, aren't you getting a little sleepy?"

The little girl nodded drowsily and blinked a few times. "Shi, gēgē..." She stumbled over to China and motioned for him to pick her up. He obeyed and turned to Hong Kong, only to find he'd fallen asleep right where he was sitting.

China held Hong Kong in his other arm and carried him and Taiwan upstairs, placing Taiwan in the bed she and Vietnam shared and quietly tucking Hong Kong in his bed in the room he shared with South Korea.

'Two down, four to go.' At least the quiet ones were asleep.

Deciding it was best to save South Korea for last, China made his way back downstairs and picked up the TV remote, promptly pressing the power button and enjoying the silence that accompanied the black screen.

"Onii-sama!" Japan whined, looking up at China. "Why did you do that?"

"Because it's naptime," China replied firmly, picking up Vietnam, who'd begun sucking her thumb contentedly. He held out his hand to Thailand, who took it and scooted off the couch. "Are you coming?"

"No," he said, crossing his arms. "I'm staying right here."

However, his body betrayed him, and he hastily covered his mouth to hide the yawn that escaped. China grinned and put Vietnam on his shoulders, holding Japan with his free arm.

He lay Vietnam down next to the now-sleeping Taiwan and put Thailand and Japan in their room.

"Phī̀ h̄ıỵ̀?" he heard Thailand call.

"Hm?" China turned back to see Thailand sitting up in his bed.

"Will you bring me Toto?"

China smiled and nodded, going down the stairs yet again to find Thailand's stuffed elephant.

He could practically feel his hair turning grey when he saw the toy on top of the still-shouting South Korea's head.

'I'm too old for this...'

"South Korea!" he ordered, taking on a tone not unlike that of Shang from Mulan. "Put Toto down. _Now_."

Of course, South Korea didn't listen. But really, who expected him to?

"Elephants originated in Korea, da-ze!" he hollered, before running outside, the stuffed gray animal still on his head.

"Aiyah..." China facepalmed and ran after him.

However, the eccentric nation's yells could no longer be heard, and China knew very well that those shouts could be heard from at least a mile away. Meaning South Korea had either gone very far, or something bad had happened to him.

"Korea?" China called, trying his best not to panic. "Xiáo yī, where are you?"

When there was no answer, he decided to walk around the perimeter of the house and pray South Korea was just playing hide-and-seek.

"South Korea? This isn't funny! Come out!"

He turned the corner, entering the backyard, only to find South Korea fast asleep in the grass, sucking his thumb peacefully. You'd never guess he'd just been running around with an elephant on his head.

China smiled with relief and scooped Korea and Toto up, carrying them both inside.

"Naps were invented in South Korea, da-ze..."

* * *

**Whoo, two chapters in two days! I'm on a roll! Actually, I just wanted to get this done, because I got a really awesome idea for next chapter.**

**I think China deserves his own chapter, with all the hell he's put through.**

**Oh, and I'd also like to say grazie to everyone who's favorited, followed, and/or reviewed~ Spain gives you all interwebz tomatoes~**


	8. Competition

Hungary was surfing the Internet while Italy watched Sesame Street, when she received an email from Poland. She opened the message and checked the recipients. China, England, Spain, France, Prussia, and herself. That couldn't be good.

_'Like, hey guys!'_ Hungary rolled her eyes. He didn't even _type_ normally.

_'So I know you guys have probably been, like, totally bored, or stressed, because you have little kids to take care of, so I talked to Liet and we're gonna, like, totally put together a contest for you! We attached a flyer to give you the deets. Later!_

_Poland'_

Hungary clicked on the attachment and read over it, a grin spreading slowly across her face.

* * *

**Poland and Liet's Totally Amazing Cuteness Contest!**

**Rules:**

**•Males ONLY. Taiwan and Seychelles are not allowed to compete. That would be totes unfair.**

**•One child nation per adult. Yes, China, that, like, totally means you.**

**•There will be TWO CATEGORIES:**

** -Appearance**

** -Actions**

**•Whoever scores highest wins. The decision of the judges is final, so, like, don't try to fight us. Prussia.**

**•The contest will take place in exactly one week, at ten o'clock sharp.**

**•Points will, like, totally be taken off for every minute you're late, so, like, be there on time.**

**•If you skip out, I'll, like, totally make Warsaw your capital.**

**See ya soon!**

**Lithuania and Poland ;)**

* * *

Hungary closed out of her email and shut her laptop. She needed to find her sewing machine...

* * *

One week later...

* * *

England confidently made his way up Poland's front steps, holding America in one arm and a bag in the other.

"You remember what to do, love?" he asked, insinuating a nod from America.

"Yup! You only made me practice it a gazillion times."

"And you're going to prove you're the cutest, right?"

America nodded again, this time more enthusiastically, and cheered, "USA!"

England chuckled and rang the doorbell. Poland answered, wearing a suit, a vibrant, floral-patterned pink tie, and an earpiece and holding a clipboard, shouting something back to Lithuania in rapid Polish.

"Ah, England! You're here!" He checked something off on his clipboard and stepped aside to let England through.

The inside of Poland's house had been completely transformed. It looked like there was a fashion show going on; a huge stage stood in the center of the enormous house, with chairs set up for the audience, and the lightning looked as if it had been done by a professional.

"Like, follow me, England. Hungary, Prussia, and China are already here."

Backstage was even more outstanding than the front. There were six dressing rooms, each labeled with either England, China, Hungary, Prussia, Spain, or France. There was a table of snacks in the corner, complete with a chocolate fountain that made America squirm when he saw it. It looked like a big movie set.

"Erm...Poland?" England raised an eyebrow at the setup. "Why are you doing this?"

Poland shrugged. "I was, like, totally bored, and I figured you guys were probably, like, really stressed out. So, like, what's a little friendly competition, right?" He smiled, before getting a call from Lithuania on his earpiece.

"I've gotta go. Like, have fun, England!"

And with that, he was gone.

England had arrived at nine in the morning, and the next hour was spent getting the little countries ready and silently glaring at the opponent nations. But the kids were hidden the entire time to keep the contest exciting.

Finally, Poland walked on stage with the microphone and faced the audience, which appeared to be made up of all the nations who weren't either running the program or competing. The judges were Lithuania, Estonia, Latvia, and Poland.

"Like, hey, everyone! Let's totally get this started!"

His words were met with a storm of applause, and he waited until it had died down to continue.

"We have six contestants today! First up is...America!"

America swaggered onstage. Literally.

He was dressed as a pirate, wearing a deep blue coat like the one England used to own. A white feather stuck out of his hat, and his brown leather boots thudded on the stage as he pulled out his cutlass and swept the crowd with a smug smile.

Following England's orders, he looked for someone talking in the audience who he could pick on. His eyes fell on Switzerland and Austria having a hushed conversation a few rows back.

"Shut up!" he called, brandishing his sword fearsomely while still maintaining his air of utter cuteness. "You two, in the back!"

Obviously, the crowd's hearts were stolen by the sassily adorable mini-pirate with a toy sword, and he placed his hands on his hips triumphantly when the applause thundered.

Poland hopped back onto the stage to announce the next contestant. "Next we have..." He let the suspense grow before saying, "North Italy!"

An "Aww" ran through the audience as North Italy skipped on stage, wearing an adorable sailor suit that Hungary had made for him. He took his cap off and bowed, winking at everyone and no one at the same time.

"Ciao~!" he greeted cheerily, and the spectators immediately broke out in a roar of applause. He giggled and happily skipped back offstage, the clapping following him all the way back to Hungary's arms.

Poland stayed at the judges' table to announce, and said, "Wow, this is going to be a totally exciting competition! Next up is South Italy!"

Everyone watched the stage expectantly, but nothing happened. Then, a crash sounded from somewhere backstage, and a familiar little voice yelled, "LET ME GO! I'LL SEND THE MAFIA AFTER YOU, BASTARD!" before South Italy ran across the stage, dressed as a tomato.

A wave of laughter shook the room, but not mocking laughter. The kind of laughter that people laugh when a little kid just said something hilarious and it was so darn cute that you have no idea what to do, so you just laugh.

And, as the little red streak that was South Italy darted across the stage shouting, "Get away from me!", the audience faced one of those incidents where they could do nothing but laugh.

"Okay...next we have Canada!"

For a brief moment, everyone was confused before they remembered who Canada was.

Wearing a red maple-leaf hockey jersey with "WILLIAMS" printed on the back and a hockey mask, his polar bear perched on his head, Canada somehow managed to ice skate across the cloth-covered stage, singing "O Canada!" beautifully at the top of his lungs. He threw his hockey stick into the crowd as he jumped up and spun in the air like a figure skater, and everyone glared at Liechtenstein when she caught it, receiving even fiercer glares from Switzerland in return.

Needless to say, there were mass amounts of cheering for the North American nation, because, think about it, it takes skills to ice skate across anything other than ice. And he was just downright adorable.

Wiping tears from his eyes, Poland continued. "This is like, totally adorbs," he remarked. "Come on out, Germany!"

Germany strutted onstage, wearing suspenders, knee-high socks, and pretty much just looking like your average, lovable, stereotypical little German boy.

The only thing he needed to say to completely win over all the male nations (especially Denmark and Latvia) was, "Beer is good!"

"It's going to be, like, so hard to decide who wins. Last but not least, Japan!"

Japan calmly walked onto the stage...

...and made every female nation in the audience (and Poland) squeal.

He was dressed as a panda, wearing a suit that had ears and a tail and a body. His face was painted black and white, and he was munching a stick of Pocky that was disguised as bamboo.

"Konichiwa!" He waved, waving the Pocky with him, and a new round of applause broke out in the crowd. He smiled, his current Pocky stick poking out of his mouth and jogged jovially offstage.

"Let's all give, like, one more round of applause for our little contestants!" Poland jumped back on the stage. "We're gonna take, like, five minutes to come to a consensus, and then we'll announce the winner! There are refreshments in the back, so, like, enjoy!" he announced before going to talk to Estonia, Latvia, and Lithuania.

Meanwhile, backstage, the younger nations were being congratulated on their performance.

"You were absolutely amazing, Alfred!"

"Lovi, you did wonderful! ¡Qué lindo!"

"Aw, Feli, I'm so proud of you!"

"Matthieu, mon chéri, you were excellent! They loved you!"

"Ha, that was awesome, West! Almost as awesome as me! You definitely won them over."

"Kiku, you're so cute! There's no way you can't win, xiáo yī!"

Five minutes later, Poland had leapt back onto the stage with an envelope.

"Okay, you guys! We've, like, decided who the winner is!"

He ripped open the envelope and pulled out the card inside. "And the winner of the Cuteness Contest is...Canada!"

America threw down his hat angrily and stormed off, while North Italy started crying, and Hungary had to take him outside to calm him down. Prussia was pissed, but said nothing, and Spain and China appeared to be on the brink of tears. South Italy was just happy he could change and go home, and Japan didn't really care.

But the crowd cheered like it was nobody's business as Canada bashfully went onstage and took his trophy, his hockey mask accidentally falling shut and bringing out another one of those special laughing fits.

"Like, thanks so much for coming everyone! It was totes fun! And, like, congrats, Canada!"

* * *

**Okay, that was, by far, the most fun thing I've written in a while.**

**Oh, and I'm totally fine with it if anyone has a suggestion to make about a chapter. I'll try to incorporate any requests I get! ^-^**


	9. Dogs

Because they had so much fun on their last playdate, England reluctantly agreed to bring America over to China's house again. This time, however, France had tagged along, bringing both Canada and Seychelles with him.

"Why did you have to come, bloody frog?"

"Oh, Angleterre, how mean of you! Dear Chine invited me as well. Or do you want to be alone with him? Ohonhonhonhonhon~"

Needless to say, France was sporting quite an outstanding black eye.

When they got to China's house, the four children dragged their older guardian nations to the backyard and went running into the woods behind China's house.

"Shouldn't we go after them?" China asked worriedly. "There are some dangerous things in those woods."

France waved his hand dismissively and sipped from a glass of wine he'd conjured up from nowhere. "They'll be fine."

"That's right, China," England concurred. "America can lift up a buffalo."

China raised an eyebrow. "Really? That's impressive."

England nodded proudly. "He's a strong young lad."

"Stronger than you, Angleterre," France snickered.

"SHUT IT, YOU BLOODY FROG!"

"Never, Black Sheep!"

"I told you not to call me that anymore!"

And thus, the chase began between the "Black Sheep of Europe" and France. China looked on from the side, not sure whether he should have been amused or concerned. He settled for drinking his tea contentedly as the two European nations ran across his lawn.

"Crazy Westerners..." he muttered. "They're like little children."

Suddenly getting an idea, he pulled out his ETT (Emergency Tasty Treats) and called, "Would you like some Chinese tasty treats?"

"WE'LL JUST GET HUNGRY AGAIN!" they yelled back. Slightly injured, China put the treats away.

It was only when the four littler nations crashed out of the woods that France and England stopped running around. And it was a good thing, too, because England was threatening to enter Pirate Mode.

"IGGYYYYYYYYY!" America ran towards his older brother.

"Iggy? What kind of a nickname is that?"

"Japan told me your name in his language is Igirisu. So I shortened it to Iggy, because I don't speak Japanish."

"It's called Japanese, America-san..."

"Whatever! Anyway, Japan found this in the woods!"

Beaming, America held up a dog, a pitiful looking thing with scruffy fur and a skinny body.

"Can we keep it? Please, Iggy?"

"I'm sorry America...I don't think we can..."

America pouted. "Why? Dude, I'm the hero! I can't just leave the poor dog all alone!"

"I'll take it!" France offered.

"NO. God knows what you'll do to it, you wanker."

At that moment, China walked over. He plucked the dog out of America's hands and examined it before looking down at Japan.

"Xiáo yī, do you want to keep the dog?"

Japan glanced up at China, a little gleam of hope in his eyes. "H-Hai, Onii-sama..."

"Then it's ours!" China said with a smile.

"Lucky jerk..." America huffed.

"What are you going to name it, Japan?" Seychelles asked.

"You should name it Maple," Canada suggested, though no one heard him.

Japan thought for a moment, then said, "Pochi. His name is Pochi."

The dog yipped in approval, and China set him down on the ground. Pochi ran around Japan in a circle before leaping into his arms.

"He needs a bath, and then food," China ordered. "You, America, Seychelles, and Canada are going to be in charge of that, okay?"

America saluted. "Yessir! Come on, guys!"

The four of them ran up the stairs and into the bathroom, where they began filling the tub up with water. Taiwan poked her head in the doorway, along with South Korea.

"What are you guys doing?" Taiwan inquired.

"Giving Pochi a bath," Japan replied.

"You know, baths and dogs originated in Korea, da-ze!"

**Later...**

France, China, and England walked into the bathroom, only to find all six little nations soaked and bubble-coated. Empty bottles of soap and shampoo were strewn across the floor, and they were attempting to wrap Pochi in a towel. The floor was flooded, and little bubbles floated across it.

China was speechless, and England laid a sympathetic hand on his shoulder. "At least the dog is clean, mate."

And that's why dogs are considered a delicacy in China.

* * *

**I'm sorry, I had to add that last part in there XD Hey, Hetalia is based off of a bunch of stereotypes.**


	10. StarCraft

Due to him spending a bit too much time hanging out with South Korea, America had taken up a new, rather addicting hobby: playing StarCraft II. It had become so obsessive that he'd taken up begging England to let South Korea come over every day, a routine that was beginning to irk the British nation.

"Now America," he began, planning on giving America one of his famous lectures while the colony played what must have been his fifteenth game of the day. "You can't waste your time cooped up in here playing this silly game all day. Look outside, it's beautiful! I'm sure Japan or Cana - Are you even listening to me?!"

The answer to England's question was, to put it simply, no, he was not. In fact, he was doing the exact opposite and tuning him out. He could have cared less about what his guardian was trying to tell him. The only thing on America's mind was raising his status, and he was barely even tall enough to reach the keyboard.

"No! Dude, Korea, don't do that! Turn around! The other way - Dammit. We lost."

America took his headphones off and put them on the desk, finally giving some attention to England, who was quickly losing patience.

"Yeah, right, England, what were you saying?" the little nation asked, stifling a yawn.

"I said, you have to stop playing this game every blooming minute of the day."

"Well, I'm not playing now!" America pointed out. "Actually, I think I'm going to go take a nap."

England looked him over accusingly. "How late did you stay up playing last night?"

"Late? What do you mean? I haven't been to bed yet!"

"Right, then. That's it. No more computer for you. We're sobering you up."

"What?! Iggy, nooooooo!" the colony whined. "You can't!"

"I think I can. And I will. Now, go to bed before I take you there myself."

America, however, refused to budge. He crossed his arms in defiance and stuck his tongue out. "I'm staying right here."

England, unfazed, had predicted such a reaction. "You have three seconds before I summon the ghosts."

At the G-word, America's eyes widened and he bolted off to his room.

"Now that's over, time to hide this infernal contraption," the bushy-browed Englishman muttered to himself.

**Meanwhile...**

America was not asleep. Rather, he'd locked his door and pretended to be asleep while he texted South Korea.

**-Iggybrows is bein a jrk :(**

_~dude, that suxxx. ur gonna miss the big trnamnt!_

**-dont remind me. ive got a plan, but i need prussias help.**

_~on it._

America filled South Korea in on his plan, and South Korea, in turn, told Prussia. Five minutes later, England's phone rang, and Prussia was suggesting the two arrange a playdate between America and Germany.

Thus, the day of the StarCraft tournament arrived, and South Korea had mass amounts of Yan-Yan at the ready. Japan had come to join him, bringing some Pocky, even though Korea insisted they eat the Korean Pocky rather than Japan's.

"Is he coming?" Japan asked through his seventh box.

Korea checked his watch. "He should be. Any minute now."

As if on cue, the doorbell rang.

"I'LL GET IT!" Korea hollered. Not that he really needed to, since China had taken the other Asian nations out for lunch, and he and Japan were the only ones home.

Not to his surprise, Prussia was standing there with America, who was beaming triumphantly.

"Remember, if you guys get in trouble, I was never here, right?" Prussia reminded the three littler countries, who saluted simultaneously.

"Good. Now, have fun, little awesome dudes!"

And he walked away, "kesesesese"ing.

"Come on, it's starting!"

Korea, Japan, and America ran upstairs and settled in front of Korea's 60" HD TV.

"From Korea, of course," he didn't hesitate to point out.

They watched the tournament intently, their little eyes never leaving the screen. They ate hamburgers and Pocky and Yan-Yan, and completely left the real world for the duration of the competition.

Which is why they didn't hear China come home.

Nor did they hear England and China talking to each other.

And they definitely didn't hear their voices coming closer.

What they DID hear, however, was the door to Korea's room opening, and two very pissed nations standing in the doorway.

"America." England's voice was deathly calm, like the eye of a hurricane right before the worst part of the storm. "Care to explain what's going on, _love_?" The way he emphasized "love" made it blatantly obvious that he was NOT feeling any love at the moment.

"I...erm...Korea?"

Korea held his hands up innocently. "Hey, I have authorization!" he said defensively, speaking through the stick of Yan-Yan in his mouth.

"You're not totally clear yourself, Korea," China scolded. "You're just as guilty as America." The oldest Asian nation turned to Japan. "Japan, did you know about this?"

Honest goody-two-shoes as he is, Japan nodded. "Hai, nii-sama, I did. Gomen na sai."

For dramatic effect, he let a few tears fall down his cheeks. Korea and America scoffed, easily seeing through the act, but everyone knows about China's weakness for cute things.

"No, xiáo yī, don't cry! You're not in any trouble, don't worry." China scooped Japan up and patted his back.

England picked America up as well, but not nearly as endearingly.

"I'm sorry, China," he apologized, but China just shook his head.

"Don't apologize to me, Opium. We both made mistakes."

England nodded gratefully and carried America back home, where he promptly set him down on his bed and interrogated him. Before long, America was in tears, telling England everything that he'd done and just how sorry he was and he'd never, ever, EVER be a bad boy again and he'll even eat England's cooking without complaint, which was a very serious sacrifice.

England, British Jerk of Jerks he is, was slightly moved. However, he was tied by a sense of parental responsibility.

He sat on the side of the bed and patted America's back soothingly. "I'm sorry, America, but I still have to take away your computer."

America hiccuped and wiped his eyes. "I *hic* know. I'm *hic* sorry, England."

"I'm taking it away for a month now, okay? It'll be back before you know it."

However, right after the word "month", America looked up at England in horror, and it was revealed that he'd never actually been crying at all, which really shouldn't have come as a surprise.

"You're taking it away for a whole month? How am I going to survive?!"

England sighed and facepalmed, not having the energy required to undergo negotiations.

"Just take the bloody thing, I don't give a damn anymore. Play until your fingers fall off."

"Yay~! Thanks, Iggy!" America scampered off and England went downstairs, only to collapse on his armchair.

"Please, God, let him grow up quickly..."

* * *

**Be careful what you wish for, England~**


	11. A (prank)War of Epic Proportions-Part 1

After observing firsthand what happens when they leave the little nations alone, Prussia, Spain, France, Hungary, China, and England had no choice but to either drag them along to the World Meeting or get someone to watch over them for the day. Luckily (for the little nations, at least), Poland offered to babysit them. He'd dragged Lithuania along, too.

And, unfortunately for the oblivious older nations, Poland was bored again. Seriously, though, he wouldn't have volunteered if there wasn't something in it for him, right?

"Alright, you guys, like, probably all already know I have a totally amazing plan for you to mess with the others, right?"

Both Italy Brothers, America, Germany, Seychelles, Canada, Japan, South Korea, and Taiwan nodded. Hong Kong still had China's trust, because he hadn't gotten into any trouble (yet), so he was home with Thailand and Vietnam.

"Ve~ What are we going to do this time, Mr. Poland?"

"Prank wars," Poland answered, grinning evilly. "But they'll have, like, no idea until they figure it out for themselves."

"How is that a war?" Germany asked.

"It's a war if he says it's a war, bastard!"

"It's a war because they can, like, totally fight back once they catch on."

"HAHAHAHAHA! I'm gonna get Iggy soooo bad!"

"This will be very interesting, Poland-san..."

"Pranks originated in South Korea, da-ze!"

"Shut it, Korea!" Taiwan snapped.

"Like, calm down, guys. I haven't even, like, told you the rules yet. Okay, first, the prank has to be legal." Poland sent a pointed glare towards America and South Korea.

"Second, you have to make sure you don't put anyone in the hospital."

"Even wine-bastard?"

Poland thought for a moment. "Yeah, I guess... He'd never, like, shut up about it if we did..."

Lithuania picked up where Poland left off. "It doesn't matter who you prank, but it has to be either Hungary, Spain, Prussia, France, England, or China."

"So tomato-bastard, wine-bastard, the older potato-bastard, eyebrows-bastard, or panda-bastard?"

"Well, yeah...but you can prank Hungary too..."

"Ve~! No! Not Miss Hungary! Please don't prank her!" There were distressed tears welling up in North Italy's eyes.

Romano patted his back like a good older brother. "Don't any of you bastards even think about pranking Hungary, or else I'll sic the Mafia on you!"

"N-No!" Veneziano hiccuped.

"Okay, so we're not pranking Hungary..." Lithuania nodded at Poland, who crossed something off on his clipboard.

"Basically, you're, like, gonna have a little rebellion. A really, really little rebellion. So, like, don't go off and rebel, or your guardians will come and kill me. Oh, and, like, whoever pulls the most pranks gets a prize. Liet and I are keeping score. And you can, like, totally work together."

Until the meeting was over and they had to leave Poland's house, the little nations discussed pranks excitedly.

* * *

That night (actually, at 2 AM), America and Canada snuck over to China's house, dressed in all black. They saw the light in South Korea's room on, and the window was open slightly. They nodded at each other and climbed silently up to the window, opening it and joining South Korea and Japan.

"Um, Korea, are you sure about this?" Canada asked nervously, actually speaking up for once. "I've seen China beat Big Brother France up before...it's kinda scary..."

Korea waved his hand dismissively. "His Asian sensibilities wouldn't let him - OW!"

Japan had hit Korea at the mention of "Asian sensibilities". "You should find some Asian sensibilities yourself, baka. Maybe then you'd also find a brain."

Korea covered his heart with his hand, as if he'd been shot in the chest. "Ouch. You're a jerk, Japan. Da-ze."

Japan just shrugged.

"A'ight, dudes, we doing this or what?" America had begun eating one of his magical burgers of randomness. "Iggy wakes up really early, and I'm already in trouble."

"Yeah, yeah, we're going," Korea rubbed the bump forming on the back of his head. "But you have to be really quiet, da-ze!"

Japan nodded in agreement. "Nii-sama's a very light sleeper, and we can't have him waking up beforehand. You have the music, ne, Korea?"

Korea pulled out his iPod in answer. "Let's go, da-ze."

The four slipped down the hallway, little black shadows, completely silent. Well, mostly silent. America tripped once or twice.

"Be quiet, da-ze!" Korea hissed as they went down the stairs.

"Hey, it's dark!"

"America-san, Korea, please stop talking before I make you."

After that, they shut up.

They stopped outside China's bedroom, checking to ensure he was asleep before donning identical pairs of sunglasses.

"Let's do this, da-ze."

Korea pressed play on his iPod, and music began blaring through hidden speakers Japan had put in China's bedroom earlier.

"OPPA GANGNAM STYLE!" the four of them yelled as they ran into the bedroom and began dancing the signature dance. Korea had made a point of playing the karaoke version and began singing the words.

China sat up in bed, his hand subconsciously closing around the handle of his wok, completely bewildered by the sudden auditory explosion. It didn't help when he saw Japan, Canada, America, and Korea wearing sunglasses and dancing the Gangnam Style dance in his bedroom.

"AYYYYYYYYYYYYYY SEXY LADY!" the four little nations shouted, dancing like little mini-PSY's and in perfect sync.

"Please be a dream, please be a dream, please be a dream..." he muttered over and over again, tugging the covers back over his head. The music vibrated in his ears and shook his whole body, and he faced the discouraging realization that it was not, in fact, a dream.

The old nation wasn't just mad, he was extremely pissed. It was two in the morning, and he was wide awake, with little to no hopes of falling back asleep.

The four little countries kept dancing and and stifling snickers after seeing how annoyed China was.

When the song finished, they bowed, then sprinted out of the room and back upstairs. America and Canada bade Korea and Japan good night and good luck before climbing back down the side of the house and laughing the whole way home.

* * *

**A lovely way to start off a prank war, if I may say so.**

**And W00T! Two chapters in one day! Even if the other one was at, like, midnight! I'm getting back my inspiration for this fic!**


	12. A (prank)War of Epic Proportions-Part 2

Romano and Veneziano had a plan, and a damn good plan at that.

"Oy, Spain!" Romano called one day while lying on the couch and eating tomatoes. "I want Feli to come over."

Spain poked his head out of the kitchen, one eyebrow raised. "Seriously? That's not like you, Romano..."

Romano turned around and threw a tomato at him, hitting him right on the head. "Does it matter, bastard? Just call up Hungary and tell her."

Spain smiled, disregarding the smashed tomato guts in his hair, and nodded, happy that his little tomato was actually showing affection of some sort.

While Spain was talking on the phone, Romano pulled out his cellphone and called his little brother.

"Sì?" came the high-pitched answer. "Che cosa, fratello?"

"Bastard's on the phone with Hungary."

"Oh, it worked! Yay!" North Italy cheered.

"Zitto, Feli!" Romano hissed. "You have to promise not to tell anyone, okay?"

"Sì, fratello," Veneziano said in a considerably quieter voice. "I promise."

"I'll see you later, then. And don't tell anyone!"

"I already said I promise!" Veneziano whined.

"I know. But I'm just reminding you. Arrivederci, fratellino."

He hung up just as Spain walked back in.

"They're coming over tomorrow, tomate. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, whatever. It's fine. And I'm not your goddamn tomato!"

"Sí, you are~" Spain grinned and ducked back into the kitchen, effectively evading the tomato that came flying at his head.

* * *

The next day, as promised, Hungary brought Veneziano over to Spain's house.

"Hola, Ita. You look excited," Spain remarked.

"Sì, I'm excited to see fratello!" Veneziano caught sight of Romano nodding at him in approval of his rushed excuse.

"Then come in, niño!" Spain moved out of the way to let them come in, and Italy immediately ran to hug his brother.

"Ready?" Romano whispered, soft enough so only the two of them could hear.

"Sì~ I'm excited!"

"Get off of me, Feli!" Romano shoved his brother away, playing up the act. He crossed his arms, trying to look as intimidating as possible in a bright pink dress.

"Vale, I'll go make us churros!" Spain said, his usual grin in place.

"I'll help," Hungary offered, and the two went off into the kitchen.

As soon as they were gone, North and South Italy ran up to Romano's room.

"I haven't managed it in a long time, fratello..." Veneziano admitted nervously.

"That's fine. It's there somewhere, we'll just have to make it come out."

Veneziano nodded and sat on the floor. "Do you have any ideas on how to make it work?"

Romano shrugged. "It comes easily to me. I don't know about you, though..."

"Well, what made it happen before?"

Tapping his chin in thought, Romano paused. "It was only when you got really mad... You don't get mad easily, though."

"Mi dispiace, fratello!" Veneziano wailed, suddenly bursting into tears. "I'm going to be the reason it doesn't work and then we're going to lose the competition and it'll all be my fault and you'll be really mad and-"

"Feli, breathe," Romano reminded him, and the younger Italian fell silent. "It'll work, don't worry. And if it doesn't, we're not going to let those other bastards win either."

Veneziano sniffled and smiled. "Grazie, fratello."

"Okay," Romano said, all business. "What do you really, really love?"

Veneziano thought for a moment, then said, "Well, I love you, and I love Miss Hungary, because she takes care of me, and I love Big Brother Spain... Oh, wait! I know! PASTA~!"

Romano nodded in agreement, then held up a box of pasta. He walked over to the trash can and took out a single noodle.

"F-Fratello? What are you...?"

Veneziano looked on in horror as the uncooked noodle fell into the trash can. For him, everything seemed to slow down, and he was rendered speechless.

And then Romano dropped another. And another. And another. Until the whole box was empty.

When he was done, he looked over at Veneziano, who was slumped against the wall, his hair covering his eyes, his head bent downwards. You could feel the anger emanating from him.

Romano smirked and thought about one thing: Germany. Almost immediately, he felt sheer fury seething through his body.

* * *

Downstairs, Hungary and Spain had just begun frying the churros. Hungary was rolling the dough while Spain cooked them, ensuring they didn't burn.

Naturally, when they heard two guns click behind them, they were, to say the least, extremely confused. Or concerned. Perhaps both.

"Romano?!"

"Italy?!"

The siblings, who had magically changed into dress pants, Armani shirts, vests and fedoras, their outfits nearly identical to each other other than the fact that Romano's shirt was red and Veneziano's was green.

"Ciao, bastards," one of them said. Both Hungary and Spain automatically looked at Romano, but the older boy's mouth had remained closed.

Meaning it had been Italy.

Romano laughed and whipped out a knife with a ruby red blade, managing to instill fear in anyone who looked at him while standing two and a half feet tall.

"Against the wall," Veneziano ordered. "_Now_."

Hungary and Spain shakily obeyed, not wanting to die. And especially not at the hand of Veneziano, of all people.

The two older nations had no idea what was going on, but they could feel Veneziano's gun barrel pointed at their backs. What they didn't know was that Veneziano had two guns, but that didn't really matter.

While Veneziano was successfully holding Spain and Hungary hostage, Romano was rummaging through the pantry for all the tomatoes and pasta Spain owned. Which was quite a lot, considering he had a Romano to feed.

He managed to carry all of it back to his room, and came back to the kitchen when he was done. As Hungary and Spain had been facing the wall, they didn't know what happened.

"Here, Feli." He held out a box of pasta to Veneziano, whose annoyed expression immediately vanished.

"Pasta!" The little boy took the box and cuddled it, as a normal child would with a teddy bear. The fedora and guns seemed to disappear, and his clothes immediately switched back. His ditzy look returned and he let out happy "ve"s.

Spain and Hungary carefully turned around, still quite unsure as to what had happened.

"I-Italy?" Hungary asked tentatively. "Are you okay?"

"Hm? Sì, Miss Hungary, I'm fine. Why? Did something happen?"

Hungary sighed and relaxed. "No, nothing happened. Are you ready to go home?"

"Aw, already? I didn't get to spend any time with fratello!"

Spain and Hungary exchanged a look, and Hungary promptly told him that they'd be back soon.

The two of them left, and Spain turned on Romano, who had yet to revert to his normal self. "What did you do to him?"

"Like hell I'd tell you, bastard!" was his response, and he stomped upstairs to enjoy his stolen treats.

* * *

**I know Poland said no pranking Hungary, but what Italy doesn't know won't kill him, right?**


	13. The British Empire Strikes Back!

Hungary and Spain were extremely unsettled by what had happened. The unsettlement only worsened when Hungary received a phone call from China.

"Hello?"

"Nihao, Hungary. Just an innocent question, has Italy done anything...wild, recently?"

Hungary tensed and shuddered. "Yes, actually, he has. Why, did something happen to you, too?"

"Yes. In fact, I'm beginning to think there's something they're keeping from us."

"Then I can talk to Italy. If anyone's going to tell, it would be him."

"Would you really? Xièxiè, Hungary!"

She heard the line go dead, and she went to track down Italy. She found him in the kitchen, cooking pasta and quietly "ve"ing happily.

"Italy? Can I talk to you?"

"Hm?" The little nation looked up from the pot. "Sì, signora. Che cosa?"

"Are you hiding something from me?"

She didn't even need an answer. The way Italy froze when she had finished asking the question was all she needed.

"M-Mi dispiace, Hungary!" he wailed, crying heavily. "P-Poland said not to tell anyone and I didn't want to make them mad at me because then they'll come and fight me and I'll be really, really, really sa-"

"Poland told you? To do what?"

"H-He said we were going to h-have a pr-prank war," Italy hiccuped. "With you guys."

"A prank war?" Hungary echoed, a plan forming in her not-so-secretly mischievous mind.

"S-Sì. You're not mad at me, are you?"

Hungary smiled at him and give him a hug. "Of course I'm not mad at you, Italy. Thank you for telling me. I won't tell anyone else that you were the one to tell me, okay? Now finish making your pasta."

At the mention of pasta, Italy instantaneously stopped crying and went back to cooking.

Hungary, on the other hand, had a phone call to make.

**Meanwhile, at England's house...**

England was reading, having just put America down for a nap, and nursing a noise-induced headache, when he heard his phone ring.

"Hello?"

"England, is that you?"

"Hungary? Yeah, it's me..."

"Oh, good. America isn't anywhere near you, is he?"

"No, he's napping. Why do you ask?"

"I have an interesting story for you..."

While Hungary filled him in on the situation, he listened intently.

"Right, so, what do you want me to do about it?"

"Well, you can use black magic, correct?"

A bad feeling began growing in England's gut, but he managed to keep his voice steady as he said, "Yes, I can. What would you have me do with it?"

Hungary gave him instructions, and he grew pale as her plan unfolded.

"I'll call everyone else and warn them," she promised. "You just...do what you need to do."

"Okay...I'll, erm, talk to you later, then."

Hungary hung up, and England went off to find his spellbook.

When he'd finally managed to dig it up, he made his way across the house to the special room he had built just for black magic. It was nearly pitch black, and he pulled his cloak down from the hook next to the door.

Just as he was about to begin, the door burst open, and he heard America's voice call, "Yo, Iggy, whatcha doin'?"

"I say, America, haven't you ever heard of knocking? Go back to watching Batman, I'll be out in a mo'."

The little American nodded and left, leaving England alone once again.

"Alright," he muttered. "Here goes everything."

**Five minutes later, in Spain's house...**

"BASTARD! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

Spain ran out of his bedroom, suddenly disturbed in the middle of his siesta. He couldn't help but notice how different Romano's voice sounded, but not a bad kind of different.

"Lovi? ¿Qué pasó?"

He ran upstairs and into Romano's room to find a Romano who was Romano but not really Romano.

"Ay. Dios. Mio."

Romano was sitting in front of his mirror, looking absolutely mortified. He was still the same person, but he had longer hair, and more feminine features, and...

"DAMMIT! What the hell did you do to me, bastard?! I'm a...a... Goddammit, I'm a GIRL!"

"Uh...are you, like, actually a girl, or do you just look like one?"

"I'm ACTUALLY A GIRL, dammit! The parts that made me a male are gone! And my voice sounds weird! Cazzo! Merda! Cazzo, cazzo, cazzo, cazzo, cazzo! Bastard! Change me back before I sic the Mafia on your ass!"

"Lovi, I had nothing to do with this!" the Spaniard pouted. It was around that time that he noticed the blinking light on the phone, telling him he had a message. He checked the Caller ID, saw it was Hungary, and immediately knew that this was her doing.

After listening to the message, he came back to Romano with a grin on his face.

"What the hell are you so happy about, bastard? Are you gonna change me back or stand there grinning like the idiot you are?"

"Lo siento, Lovi. I can't do anything about it. It was all Inglaterra."

The little part of Romano's mind that wasn't seething with anger registered that the adult nations had found out about the prank wars, but at the moment, he couldn't have cared less.

"Damn eyebrows-bastard, turning me into a girl! I'll make him pay!"

Spain looked the little boy - er, girl - over, and tilted his head to the side. "Lovi, can I braid your hair?"

"No, bastard!" was her automatic response. Then, "...okay."

**In Prussia's house...**

Prussia had gotten Hungary's phone call and had moved out of the kitchen and into the living room, drinking a bottle of beer while Germany watched German soaps that couldn't have had a positive impact on his intelligence.

It seemed that Prussia dozed off for a few minutes, waking up to hear a (very feminine) voice yell, "WHAT THE HELL?!" from the bathroom.

"Kesesesese~ And so it begins~" the albino mumbled to himself. To Germany, he called, "Oi, West! What's wrong?"

"I'm...a..." Germany came back into the living room, shaking slightly. For the most part, he (she) was unchanged, except she had longer hair and girlier features.

"Whoa. You're actually a really cute girl, West! Kesesesese~"

"You knew this was going to happen?!"

"Serves you right, playing in a prank war behind my back."

Germany sat back on the sofa, grumbling to herself about stupid big brothers and returning to her soap opera.

**At China's house...**

Unlike the others, China was excited to see what would happen to Japan, South Korea, and Taiwan. He knew Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam would be left alone, because they didn't really have a part in any of it.

"ONII-SAMA!" a voice, somewhat resembling Hatsune Miku's, shouted from upstairs.

"ANIKI!"

"GĒGĒ!"

China ran upstairs in anticipation, ignoring the confused looks he received from his other little siblings.

Taiwan was...a boy. She had short hair and looked sort of like Japan had before, but her eyes had more emotion behind them.

The blue accents on Korea's clothes had been changed into red, and he had braided hair tied in a bow down his back. There were tears in his (her) eyes as she looked herself over.

Japan was wearing a pink kimono, his hair had become around neck length. There was a chrysanthemum in it, and she wore a yellow sash.

"What happened to us?!" the three asked simultaneously.

"Pranks. That's what," came China's curt response, and the ancient nation laughed his way back downstairs.

**At France's place...**

France's one dream had been to see Seychelles as a boy and Canada as a girl, so it goes without saying that he was ecstatic.

"FRÊRE!" two voices whined from upstairs.

"Oui?" he called back, a stupid grin set in place.

He heard two pairs of footsteps on the stairs, and Canada and Seychelles appeared in front of him.

Canada's hair was tied into pigtails with bows, a maple leaf barrette on the side. She was wearing a plaid skirt and a sweater, and, had Hungary been there, she would've squealed.

Seychelles looked just like herself, only his hair was short, like Taiwan's, and he was wearing jeans and a plain white t-shirt instead of jeans.

"Why am I a girl, frêre?" Canada asked, clutching her polar bear tightly. "Even Kumakichi got changed..."

"I don't like being a boy!" Seychelles complained. "Boys are icky!"

"It's all in the name of pranks, mes chéris."

Canada gaped at him for a moment before taking Seychelles and stomping back upstairs, cursing rapidly in a way rivaled Romano.

**With Hungary...**

"Ve~ Hungary? I feel strange..."

'Huh?' Hungary thought. 'His voice didn't change at all... Did it work?'

When Italy walked into the room, the only indication that it had worked was that her hair was significantly longer.

"What happened to me? Am I...a girl?"

"Do you feel like a girl?"

"Sì. Wait...what does being a girl feel like?"

Hungary beckoned for the little girl to come closer to her, and the older woman whispered some things in her ear that prompted a nod from the toddler.

"Oh, sì! I feel like a girl!"

"Then you're a girl, Italy. Here, wear this." Hungary took the flower out of her hair and pinned it in Italy's.

"Yay~!"

Hungary shook her head and smiled as Italy pranced back into the kitchen.

**Back at England's...**

England had just come out of his black magic room and was locking the door when he heard America scream from the living room, confirming that the plan had worked.

"IGGGGYYYYYYYYYY! Something is really, really wrong here!"

The fact that America now had the voice of a girl made England smile with satisfaction.

When he walked into the living room, he found America studying herself in the mirror, completely overwhelmed with horror.

Her dirty blonde hair was now shoulder length, and she was now wearing a cropped top, shorts, and a leather jacket.

"Why am I a girl?!"

"Ask Poland."

England left his dumbfounded colony and went to go make some tea, hiding his smirk the entire time.

* * *

**I was aiming to redeem myself for that fail that I labeled chapter twelve. Gomen na sai, this is sorta filler OTL But more Nyotalia fun is on the way, I swear it!**

**Anyway, the prank war continues! Who's next?**


	14. A (prank)War of Epic Proportions-Part 4

America was, to sum it up in a single word, pissed.

"We're girls! GIRLS!"

"America-chan, please calm down, it's not like we're going to die."

"Don't tell me to calm down, Japan! I have to sit down to pee and Korea has a braid!"

"Ve~ I kinda like being a girl!"

"Yeah, but everyone already thought you were a girl anyway..." Canada pointed out, but nobody heard her.

"Well, I hate it." Romana crossed her arms. "That damn tomato-bastard braided my hair! And put me in a dress!"

"Don't you wear a dress all the time?"

"Shut up, potato-bastard! It's none of your business!"

"Alright, dudes, chill!" America banged her fist on the table to get their attention. "We need a game plan. Any ideas?"

"I think we should hit eyebrows-bastard where it hurts!"

"You mean...down there, da-ze?"

"Iya, I think Romana-chan meant we should get revenge..."

"Ve~ What does revenge mean?"

"Revenge originated in South Korea, da-"

"EVERYONE SHUT UP!"

The girls did as they were told and turned to look at Seychelles and Taiwan. (Hey, their bodies changed, but their minds didn't. And face it, girls are much more organized than boys.)

"Thank you," Seychelles huffed and sat back down, allowing Taiwan to take over.

"If it's revenge on England you're looking for, then I have an idea."

"Ve~ I still don't know what that means!"

"Oi, frat - er, sorellina, look, pasta. Fetch."

"PASTA~!" Veneziana pranced out of the room and sat in the kitchen, happily (and quietly) eating.

"Thank you, Romana."

Said profane Italian nodded in acknowledgement at the Asian nation, and he continued.

"Now, we've all noticed England's, er, prominent eyebrows..."

"Eyebrows? I thought they were caterpillars he kept there for decoration, da-ze."

"No, Korea, dude, they're eyebrows."

"Korea-chan, why would he keep caterpillars on his face...?"

"I don't know. He's weird, da-ze."

Hey, can't argue with logic.

"Anyway, back to the topic, he's very...proud of his eyebrows, isn't he, America?"

"Yeah, dude. He never shuts up about them."

"What does he do to them?"

America tilted her head. "What do you mean?"

"Does he groom them or something?"

"I think I saw him trimming them once..."

"Shut _up_, potato-bastard. No one asked you!"

"Oh my Shinigami, can you all just BE QUIET?!"

Everyone turned to stare at Japan, who was sitting back down, flustered and red-faced.

"Sumimasen. I don't know what came over me."

Korea began clapping slowly, but was elbowed in the ribs by America.

"Um, xiéxié, Japan. Now, Germany said he trims them. Is that true?"

America nodded to confirm. "They're still thick as hell, though."

Taiwan grinned mischievously and relayed her plan to America, who was to be the ringmaster of this prank.

* * *

Two days after the little nations' secret meeting at Prussia's house, Japan, Korea, and Canada came over to England's to play with America.

"Alright, men! Er, girls," the hyperactive nation corrected herself. "I call this plan 'Attack Plan Alpha', like Alpha Dog! Woof!"

"Just get on with it, da-ze."

America glared at Korea and continued.

"This," she paused to draw what looked like a razor on the whiteboard behind her, "is the trimmer Iggy uses for his cater-brows. It comes with four little attachments." To emphasize her point, she drew all four, circling one. "This is the one he uses to trim them, and this," she drew a circle around another one, "will do what we need it to do."

"So that's our job? That seems simple, America-chan."

"Not simple," America brandished the marker in the Japanese girl's face. "Efficient."

"Where's Mr. England now?" Canada asked. "I don't hear him downstairs."

America tapped her chin. "I think he said something about 'teaching the frog a lesson', whatever that means. Told me he'd be back later."

"Then this should be easy, da-ze!" Korea smiled evilly and rubbed her hands together.

"Um, Korea, you're scaring Kumakichi..."

"Let's go, da-ze!"

The Asian nation ran out of the room with America, who was laughing her crazy/epic/concerning laugh. Japan and Canada trudged after them.

"Hey, Japan?"

"Hai, Canada-chan?"

"Do you ever feel like you're being dragged into things against your will?"

"...every day."

Evidently, Korea and America had already made it to the bathroom and were attempting (failing) to switch the attachments.

"Ugh," America scoffed, throwing the razor down onto the counter. "Stupid guy stuff..."

Japan raised an eyebrow, and America looked up in horror.

"Oh, no... No, no, no! I'm still a guy! I'm still a guy!"

Canada patted her sister on the back, and the American burst into tears.

Japan and Korea, however, had succeeded in figuring out how the razor worked and proceeded to change the attachment and place it back in its spot.

Korea rolled her eyes when she saw America crying and pulled her by the ear out of the bathroom. "Come on, da-ze."

"So...what are we going to do until Mr. England comes home?"

"Wanna watch a movie?"

"Depends, da-ze. What movie?"

"Dunno. Let me see."

America rummaged through the movie cabinet and found a movie called "The Notebook".

"What's this?"

"May I see it?" Japan asked, looking over the movie case when she received it. "It might be like 'Death Note'..."

"Whoa, seriously?!" America snatched the case back, already placing the disc in the DVD player. "I love Death Note!"

Japan provided some Pocky (though Korea insisted on Yan-Yan), Canada made pancakes, and America popped popcorn.

**_2 hours later..._**

America sniffled and wiped the tears from her eyes. "That was the saddest thing I've ever watched."

"H-Hai..." Japan dabbed at her eyes with her handkerchief.

"Did we just watch a chick flick, da-ze?"

"I believe so," Canada answered, using Kumajiro's paw to wipe her eyes.

"Why are we crying? Heroes don't cry!"

"I believe we'd be heroines now, America-chan."

"Did you just call me a drug?"

Ignoring the question, Japan said, "Girls have strange emotions."

"Damn straight. I never would have cried at that as a boy, da-ze."

"So being a girl means we cry at chick flicks?"

"Apparently so."

"I'd like to know why Mr. England had that movie in the first place."

The statement was followed with a moment of awkward silence, as England had walked through the door muttering curses at a certain Frenchman. He stopped when he saw the four of them still crying.

"What happened? Why are you crying?"

"W-We watched 'The Notebook'," America hiccuped.

"And...?"

"It was so sad, da-ze!"

"Sad?" England tilted his head. "I wouldn't call it sad - OW!"

America had thrown a pillow at him. "You d-don't understand!" She grabbed another pillow and sobbed into it. Japan sniffled. Korea choked back a sob. Canada grabbed a tissue and blew her nose.

"Is this because you're girls now...?"

"How sh-should we know?" America's muffled voice rose from the pillow.

"We think so, England-san." Japan ignored America again and tucked her handkerchief back in her kimono.

"Right...well, I'll go freshen up and then make you guys - er, girls - something to eat."

"No, don't trouble yourself, Mr. England," Canada said quickly. "We'll order pizza or something."

"Yes...of course." England trudged off to the bathroom, and the four girls managed to overcome their movie-induced sadness, remembering why they'd watched the movie in the first place.

"Oooooh, this is gonna be fun~!" America giggled creepily in a way that could have put Russia to shame.

"Shh, I wanna hear, da-ze!"

They sat silently and heard the razor whirring in the distance, followed by a loud, "What the bloody...? AMERICA!"

The little girl laughed and ran upstairs, followed by her three partners-in-crime. When England burst through her door around thirty seconds later, they were reading magazines.

"Oh, hey Iggy," America greeted nonchalantly. "Did you do something with your hair? You look different."

Korea and Canada stifled laughter, and Japan hid a smile.

"Don't play innocent, America. I know it was you."

England was now England sans eyebrows. As in, what used to look like two caterpillars above his eyes had disappeared. And to anyone looking at him, he was hilarious.

"Hey! You can't just blame me for forgetting to change the thingy on your stupid razor!"

"..." England spun on his heel and walked away without a word. As soon as he was out of earshot, America's room erupted into giggles.

"Taiwan is a genius," Japan remarked.

Canada sighed. "Revenge is sweet."

* * *

**If you haven't watched The Notebook, it is NOTHING like Death Note. At all.**


	15. A (prank)War of Epic Proportions-Part 5

Around the time England was getting his impromptu makeover, Spain and France were walking over to Prussia's house for lunch. Of course, they weren't JUST going for lunch. Where would the fun be in that?

They walked up the steps and rang the doorbell, grinning stupidly. When Prussia answered the door, he greeted them with an equally idiotic grin.

"Toni, did you bring it?"

Spain held up the bag he'd been carrying in answer. "Sí, it's right here."

"Kesesesese~ This is gonna be awesome!"

"Mon ami, if she kills you, I had nothing to do with this, right?"

Prussia waved his hand dismissively. "Yeah, fine, whatever, go be a pansy about it. Long as you help me pull this off, then you can be the unawesome flower of your choice."

"Can I be a carnation?"

"Yes, Toni, you can be a carnation. Just come inside."

The other two European nations did as they were told and followed Prussia into the kitchen.

"Where is your hermanita?"

"Hungary took her to the playground with Veneziana. They should be back soon."

France rolled up his sleeves and began washing his hands. "We should begin, then, oui?"

**An hour later...**

"C'est magnifique! It's finished!"

"Es bueno! It can't not work!"

"Kesesesese~ Now we just have to wait for little West to come home!"

As if on cue, the doorbell rang, and there was Hungary with a very happy Veneziana and a very tired-looking Germany.

"Hey, Liza. How'd it go?"

"It was fine. It's REALLY hot out, though."

"Sì! It was like sorella's part of the country!"

"That's fine. We have an awesome lunch for you, West. Thanks, Liza."

Veneziana gave Germany a hug and waved, and she and Hungary left.

"You didn't finish all the beer while I was gone, did you?"

Prussia pouted at his little broth - um, sister. "Why is that the first question you ask me?"

"Because you're you. Did you?"

"No, that would be unawesome of me, and you know I can't do anything unawesome."

Germany rolled her eyes and sat down at the dining table. Spain and France came out of the kitchen with a plate of food and put it down in front of her.

"You three aren't eating?"

France forced himself to hide his (not-so-)sly smile as he said, "No, chérie, we ate before you came. Don't worry about us, enjoy your meal."

Germany nodded and took a bite. "Wow, this is actuall-"

She coughed mid-sentence, her eyes widening. She looked around desperately for water, but found none and ran to the kitchen.

Not feeling a bit of remorse, Prussia began laughing uncontrollably like the horrible older brother he is, until he remembered that they were, actually, out of beer.

"Oh, scheiße, she's gonna kill us!"

"I warned you, mon ami."

"Callate! Right now, we have to run for our lives!"

The three of them sprinted upstairs and hid in Prussia's closet, locking the door behind them.

"Ohonhonho - OW! Toni, what was that for?!"

"This is no time to get horny, amigo!"

"Ja, he's right. Think clean thoughts for once."

"...that's not possible."

"Try anyway!"

In the end, France just resorted to not talking altogether.

They heard banging on the door and huddled in the corner, trembling, but still not regretting anything.

It was only when the closet door was torn open that they screamed. And no, despite what Prussia says, they did NOT sound awesome.

"I. Am. Going. To. KILL YOU!"

They screamed again, this time louder, and began begging for mercy.

"Lo siento, it was all them!"

"Oi! Don't pin this on me, Toni!"

"Oui, I asked to be specifically left out of this!"

Germany was actually enjoying watching them bicker. Deep inside her little heart, she wanted them to kill each other so she couldn't be blamed.

However, there was no such luck.

"Okay, West, I'll make you a deal. Don't kill us yet."

Reluctantly, Germany moved out of the way to let them out of the closet.

"What's your deal?"

"You can have all the beer in the house for a year?"

"We don't even HAVE any beer, thanks to you! Did you even think this through?"

"Did you really expect me to think it through?"

"..."

The three older nations looked at Germany expectantly, and she finally said, "What did you put in the food?"

"A Trinidad Scorpion, the hottest pepper in the world. Why?"

"Each of you has to eat ten of them. No beverages. And Hungary gets to videotape."

"¿QUÉ?"

"Whoa, West, that's asking a little too much..."

"No wine?!"

"It's payback for being idiots."

"It might not be too bad," Spain thought aloud. "It's better than being brutally murdered while we sleep."

"Who cares?! The awesome me is going to DIE of pepper poisoning!"

"Oui, he has a point, Toni... We could get really bad ulcers and die."

"But at least this way, there's a chance we WON'T die."

"Ah... Oui, I like Toni's plan."

"...fine. Only because the Awesome can't die."

Germany rolled her eyes and went off to make a few calls.

Needless to say, a river was cried over peppers that day.

* * *

**Sorry this isn't that good...**

**The prank war is almost over! Next chapter is the last one :D**


	16. A (prank)War of Epic Proportions-Finale

**SaySaeri, to answer your question, Romana had some business with the Mafia, so she had to go do that.**

**maplepancakes99, to answer ****_your_**** question, do you really think Prussia cares?**

**And finally, IrishMaid, this is for you.**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

England stomped into the world meeting room, his gaze pointed downwards and his hair combed down over his eyes.

"Opium? Why are you so sad? Not that I'm complaining, but still."

"I'm not sad." England didn't raise his head.

"Inglaterra, you must be sad. Did something happen with your little tomate?"

"No. Wait...yes."

"What happened, Angleterre? Has Amérique finally rebelled?"

"What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean, Frog?!"

"Kesesesese~ It's about time. I can't believe he - I mean, she - actually stayed with you so long!"

"Shut up, Prussia. America hasn't rebelled."

"Then why have you suddenly gone emo?"

England turned to look at Hungary, revealing his eyebrows, or lack of, for the first time.

France gasped. "Mon Dieu, he's even uglier than before!"

"Francia, amigo, don't be an idiot. Obviously, las tomates have pulled another prank."

"Gott, I'm still trying to get the taste of pepper out of my mouth. I think it's about time we taught a certain unawesome girl-boy a lesson."

"Oui, we should. But first..." France pulled out some eyeliner and stenciled in some eyebrows for England. "There. Now I can actually look at you."

"Shut it, frog, before I shut it for you!"

"Ohonhonh - OW!"

England had kicked France in the...never mind. "Any ideas on how to get back at Poland?"

"We could ask Russia," Hungary offered.

"No way in hell am I asking Russia anything," Prussia spat. "That would be an insult to my awesomeness."

"Lithuania might know. He spends a lot of time with the báichī, doesn't he?"

"Sí, he does, but aren't they amigos?"

"He would still know his weakness, though, oui?"

"Speaking of which, where are those two?"

England's question was followed with a moment of silence.

"I could call Poland," Hungary said with a shrug, pulling out her cellphone.

"Just make sure you don't reveal our plan. That would be so unawesome."

"I won't. Unlike you, I'm not an idiot."

"Ouch. Liza, you're a jerk."

But Hungary was already on the phone and telling him to shush. "Hé, Poland. Is Lithuania there? Can I talk to him?"

"H-Hungary?" Lithuania's timid voice came through the receiver. "Do you need something...?"

"Yeah. Is Poland there with you?"

"No, he left to go feed his ponies. What's wrong?"

"You guys are good friends, right?"

"Um...I guess?"

"So you know his weaknesses, right?"

"Weaknesses? I don't know, Hungary, I wouldn't feel right telling you..."

"I'll hit Russia with my frying pan next time I see him."

"...promise?"

"Of course."

"Alright, well, there is one thing..."

* * *

As it turned out, Lithuania was a key element to Hungary's plan. Yes, it was Hungary's plan. It's ALWAYS Hungary's plan.

"LIEEEEEEEET!" Poland called from his bedroom. "Like, where are all my clothes?"

"On the dining table. I just finished folding them."

Poland shuffled out, wearing his fluffy, pink, pony-embroidered bathrobe, his hair wrapped up in a towel. "Hey, like, what's wrong with them?"

He held up his favorite pink sweater, which was now splotched with around seven other colors. "What happened?!"

"Oh, whoops. That tye-dye shirt must have made its way into the load..."

"So, like, all my clothes are ruined?" Poland asked, his voice cracking and his eyes tearing up.

"Well, no. You still have all your, erm, normal clothes."

"But those are, like, so BORING!" Poland wailed. "I, like, want my old clothes!"

The nation threw himself onto the floor and began pounding his fists, while Lithuania watched, unsure whether or not he should be amused, annoyed, or concerned.

Luckily, he didn't have to choose, since the phone rang. Poland picked himself up and sulked over to answer.

"Hello?" he sniffed.

"Well, hello, Poland," came the British accented voice. "How's your new wardrobe working out for you?"

Poland's eyes widened. "It was you?!"

"Indirectly, yes. It's called payback for getting the kids involved in this bloody prank war."

"But, like, I wasn't supposed to be pranked!"

"Tough luck, then, chap. 'Fraid I can't help you there."

"...you're a jerk."

"I can live with that. Now, call off this prank war or I'll let all your ponies loose."

"You wouldn't."

"Try me."

"Fine, fine! Just, like, don't touch my ponies! It's over now. I'm, like, really sorry for anything that happened."

"Excellent. Now - wait, America, what are you doing?! No, put that down!"

"Erm, England? Are you, like, okay?"

"Sorry, Poland, I've got to go."

England hung up, and Poland turned to Lithuania. "Like, come on, Liet. We have to, like, totally go shopping."

**At England's house...**

"America, what did you just throw in the fireplace?"

"Dunno," was the little girl's reply as she continued prodding the fire. "Some big, brownish book. I figured you didn't need it. It looked like it was one of those that you have a bajillion copies of."

"Where did you pick it up from?"

"The coffee table. It had weird writing on it, in some random language. I can only read American."

"It's English!"

"Same thing. Either way, I didn't understand it."

"Was it really heavy?"

"Yup. Took a lot of effort to throw in the fire, but I'm the heroine, so it's all good."

"THAT WAS MY SPELLBOOK, YOU IDIOT!"

"What, you don't know how to spell?"

England began rubbing his temples in an effort to keep his composure. "Not spelling, magic spells."

"So...what did I do again?"

"You BURNED it!"

"...I still don't get what the problem is."

"That book was the one thing that could have turned you back into a boy!"

America's eyes widened as she understood just what was going on. "Oh... D-Does that mean I'm stuck like this forever?"

"Until I can get another spell that will reverse it, then yes."

America sniffled, and her eyes teared up as she looked into the now thriving fire. "I'm sorry, England..."

England's expression softened, and he knelt down beside his colony. "Hey, cheer up. You're not supposed to cry, love."

America wiped her eyes and gave England a small smile. "I don't think I'm the one you have to worry about, though. Romana and Germany are going to be REALLY pissed."

England paled at the thought, and America beamed.

"But, dude, at least we've got a fire now!"

* * *

**Who won? It's obvious, isn't it? It was Lithuania XD**

**No, actually, the winner was technically Hungary...**

**Or America...**

**Or Canada...**

**Or Korea...**

**Or Japan...**

**Hell, the winner was whoever you guys wanted it to be. I say it was Hong Kong, but that's just me.**


	17. Halloween

It was Halloween, that magical night when screaming skeletons pop out at you and that weird pumpkin won't stop smiling like it's going to eat you.

Of course, the nations were going trick-or-treating together. They had congregated in England's house (much to the nation's protest), and were waiting for sundown.

America was Spider-Man, or Spider-Girl, rather, since she was still female, and had suffered minimal injuries after telling Germany and Romano whose fault it was that they were still girls as well.

Japan was dressed as Sailor Moon, secretly delighted that she was a girl so she could pull the cosplay off better.

Korea didn't let her gender change discourage her and came dressed as PSY, still on a Gangnam Style kick.

North Italy was wearing her sailor uniform from the Cuteness Contest, but Hungary had altered it so it had a skirt rather than shorts to go along with it. In fact, it looked sort of like the sailor uniforms Japan used.

South Italy, on the other hand, was disguised as a broken doll. "Stitches" ran across her face, and her "dirty" gray-brown dress was ragged and torn. Her hair hung in a loose, stringy ponytail, and she had stuck a "knife" in the middle of her forehead, "blood" streaming down from the "wound". Her face was pale and ashen, and she looked...dead. America and Veneziana were afraid to go near her.

"V-Ve~? Sorella, you're scaring me..."

"Boo," was Romana's half-hearted response. Veneziana screamed and ran to Hungary in tears.

Canada had on a brown wig and white sunglasses and was wearing a purple hoodie and boys' jeans. For once, everyone could see her.

"Ve~ Canada, who are you dressed as?"

"I'm...Justin Bieber..."

America squealed and glomped her sister. "Oh my God, no way! You look so cute, sis!" Canada facepalmed and squirmed uncomfortably.

Germany was wearing a full-face mask and a suit, and Prussia laughed nervously whenever he looked at her.

"Um, potato-bastard? What the hell's up with the mask?"

Germany flipped her mask up and said, "Bruder can tell you."

Prussia chuckled again, his voice breaking slightly as he said, "I don't think I should..."

"Why? Chicken?"

"Shut up, Liza! Fine, I'll tell you. She's der Großmann."

"We don't all speak your stupid potato-language! The hell does that mean?"

"Slenderman," was all that escaped the nation's lips, and he refused to say anymore.

Taiwan had come dressed as a panda, something simple and cute, and was happy with his costume. He liked having his face painted.

Seychelles was a pirate, reminding Spain of his old days as a conquistador.

"Aw, Seychelles, ¡qué lindo! You look just like I did when I was a pirate! Except my eyes were green."

Spain himself had worn his football uniform and painted his flag colors on his face. He'd even brought a football in as a prop.

France had chosen to keep his costume easy and plain, so he'd brought a masquerade mask to wear with his tuxedo. No one could really tell who he was supposed to be, but Japan settled with Tuxedo Mask, and no one argued.

Prussia merely had sunglasses, a t-shirt with the words "I'm too awesome for a costume" printed on it, and jeans. But he still looked awesome.

Hungary was dressed as Little Bo Peep, though the only thing she was using her shepherdess crook for was beating up Prussia. It was actually quite entertaining to watch.

China wasn't necessarily dressed up, but he had gone to great lengths to dig up one of his old robes from his Imperial days. He was happy with himself, and that's all that mattered, right?

And then there was England. He was wearing a long, dull, gray robe and a large matching hat, the kind that wizards wear. He had a tall wooden staff and was wearing a long, white-gray wig and an equally long beard of the same color. He'd also put on fake, even bushier gray eyebrows. The only distinguishing characteristic he possessed were his green eyes.

"Inglaterra...? Are you trying to intimidate us? Because right now, I'm feeling less intimidation and more concern. Who are you?"

"I'm Gandalf," was his response, as if it should have been obvious.

"Gangnam?" Korea perked up from the other side of the room, where she had been conversing with America and Japan.

"No! Gandalf! From 'The Lord of the Rings'!"

He received nothing but blank stares from the others, and rolled his eyes. "Forget it," he grumbled, adjusting his hat. "Let's just go already."

* * *

The large group headed outside and began their journey down the street. At every house, the routine was the same: more cuteness=more candy. Luckily, they'd developed a way to use that little fact to their advantage.

"Hello, Miss Lady. Candy for the little Spider-Girl?" Don't ask me why they fell for that one, adults are strange.

"In the name of the moon, I will punish you if you don't give me some candy! ...please." Hey, everyone loves a kid who can quote old-school anime and still mind their manners.

"OPPA CANDY STYLE!" That one was a winner.

"I'll sing you a song if you give me some extra candy..." There were quite a few instances where Canada actually had to sing Justin Bieber songs.

"Give. Me. Candy. Now." And then Romana would pull out a toy(?) knife and threaten the poor soul, who still thought it was only an act.

"Ciao~! Can I have some pasta~? Or maybe candy... Sì, candy's fun too~!" Needless to say, Veneziana had to ask Hungary to carry her candy on the way back because it was so heavy.

Germany didn't say anything, but she still got extra candy for being extra intimidating. Funny how that works.

Taiwan would just make little puppy-dog eyes and hold out his candy bag, and no one can resist puppy-dog eyes. NO ONE.

Seychelles would use his vast knowledge of pirate jargon and switch up his script every once in a while, and it always worked.

There was one house, however, that made all fifteen of them leave shaking in their boots.

"Um...England?" America squeaked nervously. "I'm scared..."

England clenched his jaw and said nothing, but a sobbing South Korea was clinging tightly to China, who wasn't enjoying being in his little sister's death grip.

"No! Aniki, don't go! I need you!"

Japan and Canada calmly walked up to the house, ignoring the spiderwebs, old bandages, and fake bones that brushed their shoulders as they did so. Seychelles and Taiwan marched up behind, with a trembling Veneziana behind them, clinging to the ever-apathetic Germany. Romana just muttered, "Tch. Bastards," and stomped up the driveway. South Korea never left China.

Japan rang the doorbell, and a piercing scream rang out around them, causing America and Veneziana to yelp loudly and run off. The door creaked open just a tiny bit, and a violet eye appeared in the crack. A soft, menacing laugh reached their ears, and even Germany was frozen in fear.

That is, until the door opened the rest of the way, and Russia's smiling face appeared.

"Privyet, comrades! I am having the candy for all of you~"

Russia gave them what seemed like a bag of candy each, and Romana laughed at America, who was holding tightly onto England's leg and refusing to open her eyes.

In case it wasn't obvious, they all went back to England's house with overflowing pillowcases that night.

* * *

"Oh, Angleterre~! Is it okay if we stay here tonight? We'll leave in the morning."

"Frog, why is it always my house?!"

"Don't be a stick in the mud, Inglaterra! Think about los tomates!"

England looked over at the children, who were happily sorting and counting and eating their haul. They'd dumped it all into the middle, in a pile that covered the floor.

"...fine. But you're all leaving first thing tomorrow, got it?"

"Ja, whatever," Prussia said with a dismissive yawn. "I'm beat. I'd say it's bedtime, huh, West?"

But the kids had grown unusually silent. All six guardians looked over worriedly, only to find all nine kids shaking slightly, but they didn't look scared. Hungary was the first to speak up.

"Hey, what's up with the-"

"SUGAR RUSH!" America yelled and began jumping on the sofa. The other eight followed suit, hanging upside down from the chandelier (though how they got up there is a mystery) and bouncing off the walls, so to speak.

South Korea began blasting Gangnam Style while America played the Party Rock Anthem, Japan turned her Vocaloid playlist up on high, and Germany began saying something about German sparkle parties.

North and South Italy challenged each other to a (very competitive) game of Dance Dance Revolution, and Taiwan and Seychelles ran around doing flips and twirls and all the gymnastic stuff they'd learned before being turned into boys.

In a nutshell: the room exploded into chaos.

The six older nations scrambled to the corner and huddled together in a circle to come up with a game plan.

"Vale, any ideas?"

"I think we should just awesomely make a run for it."

"And leave the little ones alone? I don't think so, báichī."

"We could just wait it out, oui?"

"Did you see how much candy they ate, frog? That could bloody well be weeks!"

"Maybe one of us should stay while the others get help," Hungary offered. "I nominate China."

The remaining nations (sans China) nodded.

"Wait, what? Why me?!"

"Because you're the oldest, Chine, non?"

"That doesn't mean you can just throw me into a room with nine sugar-high children!"

"Well, I'm too awesome, so count me out."

"Sí. I have to...um...file some paperwork?"

"But this is England's house!" China whined. "Why can't he do it?"

"Because...because...erm, because I just remembered I'm late for tea with the Queen! Until next time, then, good luck!" England quickly left the room.

"Oui, I have to go do something...somewhere else." France left as well.

"The Awesome needs his awesome sleep, so goodnight. Have fun, China. Kesese - OW!"

"Shut up, idióta. Let's go. See you later, China."

Hungary and Prussia left, and China turned back, only to find that Spain had mysteriously disappeared too.

"Damn all of them. This sucks," he muttered, puffing his cheeks out slightly in irritation. He slowly got up and approached the children with caution, taking deep breaths to calm his nerves.

_'They're just children. Hyperactive, sugar-high, slightly insane children. You can do this, Yao.'_

**The next morning, November 1st...**

"China?" England called, the other four elder nations following behind him. "China, where are you?"

He walked into the room they had been in the night before and was greeted by quite a sight.

China was wide awake and reading, as neat and China-like as ever, and the room was nothing like it had been last night. The nine children were all asleep in various spots: on the sofa, in sleeping bags or mattresses on the floor, on the bed. The room was spotless, as if last night had never happened.

Everything was peacefully quiet, but China scowled when he saw them come in.

"Wow," Hungary breathed in awe. "How did you manage this?"

"Ja, it's awesome!"

"Ancient Chinese secret. And you're all lucky I haven't declared war on you. Yet."

* * *

**Happy Halloween, everyone! Cross your fingers for another zombie apocalypse evasion this year, and have tons of CANDY!**

**Oh, and anyone out there super psyched for NaNoWriMo?**


	18. Shopping

It all started with Japan and Korea being manipulative and using their powers of adorability for evil, not good. America would have been ashamed.

"Onii-sama?"

"Aniki?"

China awoke, sat up, and rubbed his sleepy eyes. He'd fallen asleep in the middle of "Hello Kitty".

"What's wrong? Did Thailand lose Toto again?"

"Iya, Nii-sama, it's just-"

"We want to go shopping, da-ze!" Korea announced.

China stared at her blankly. "Why?"

"Well, we don't have too many girl clothes, and we can't keep wearing our old clothes while we're like this..."

China nodded thoughtfully and tapped his chin. "Maybe I should call Hungary...she would know what to do, right?"

Korea hid an evil smirk, and Japan nodded eagerly.

* * *

And thus, France, Spain, Prussia, England, and China had been coerced into dragging Canada, Romana, Germany, America, Veneziana, Japan, and Korea to the mall so Hungary could take them shopping. Prussia and England were becoming concerned and confused as to why the little nations were squealing over shoes. France and Spain had gone off to flirt with random girls, but Hungary got mad (*cough*jealous*cough*) when Prussia joined in.

"Wanna go to the food court?" he asked England and China.

England said yes, China nodded, and they left.

Basically, Hungary took charge and led the girls around the mall, glaring at anyone who gave her judgmental looks. She had also considered inviting Belgium to come along, but decided not to at the last second. She was a nation, and a damn epic nation at that. She didn't need any help, and she liked being able to assist the little girl nations.

"Ve~ Hungary? Can you buy this for me? Per favore?" Veneziana held up a little red dress, with matching ruby slippers. It was, in a word, adorable.

Hungary smiled. "Of course you can, sweetie."

While Hungary dealt with that, America and Korea were running around, Japan had found a Hatsune Miku shirt, Canada was trying on a hoodie with a stack of pancakes on the front, Romana was admiring the Italian football team jersey, and Germany had caught sight of a t-shirt that said "German Bier Makes me Danzen".

Needless to say, they were having a fun time.

They finished up in that store, one of those random independently-owned vintage t-shirt shops, and moved on, looking for another place to max out the guy nations' credit cards, which they had (very unwisely) lent Hungary for the day, after she promised not to lose them. And she wouldn't, but it's not like they had given her a limit as to how much she could spend. Then again, they might have, but she hadn't been listening.

America caught sight of a certain store and began pulling Hungary's arm. Japan saw it too and helped out.

"Hungaryyyyyyyyyyy! Let's go to Hot Topic! Pleeeeeeaaaaaaase?"

"Hai, Hungary-san, can we please?"

"What the Hell's so great about a stupid store?"

"Ve~ Sì, I agree with sorella. What's the big deal?"

"The big deal," America explained with an irritated stomp of her foot, "is that it's Hot Topic."

Germany shrugged. "We might as well give it a try, ja?"

"Yeah!" America grabbed Japan's arm, who grabbed Hungary's hand, and they ran into the store, with Korea chasing them and yelling, "WAIT FOR ME, DA-ZE!" Romana, Veneziana, Germany, and Canada walked reluctantly after them.

* * *

They all came out with at least one bag (even Hungary), but America had something like seven, and they were all filled to bursting. Japan and Korea had just a little less. Who knew Hot Topic had clothes in their size?

After that, they went to a ton of other stores, pretty much every one in the mall, until Hungary's phone rang while they were in Macy's. When she saw who it was, she rolled her eyes.

"What do you want?"

"Hungaryyyyyyyyyyy!" came a certain whiny albino's voice. "Where have you been? The awesome me and England and China have been stuck waiting in the food court forever!"

"You obviously don't understand how important shopping is, idiot."

"You're right, I don't. Are you guys almost done? Waiting is unawesome. And now Spain and France are back too."

Hungary rolled her eyes again and gestured for America and Korea to get away from the makeup samples before their "makeover" got too out of hand. "We'll be there in fifteen minutes."

Without waiting to hear what Prussia had to say, she ended the call.

"Alright," she said to the little nations, who had been exploring, calling them back. "The guys are being stupid, so we have to go now."

There was a unanimous "Aww" from the seven girls, and they trudged behind Hungary all the way back to the food court.

America's mood, however, immediately changed when she saw the huge stack of hamburgers on the table where the five male nations were situated.

England eyed the many bags suspiciously, China complained about how un-Chinese the food from the "Chinese restaurant" was, and Prussia was nomming his way through some large French fries while France and Spain tried explaining to him that they weren't actually French.

"Exactly how much money did you spend?" England asked, and Hungary shrugged.

"We didn't even have to use your credit card, so I'd say we did fine."

China stopped complaining (for now) and turned to Japan and Korea. "Did you two have fun?"

"Hai, Onii-sama."

"It was awesome, da-ze!"

"No, I'm awesome," Prussia cut in, but Hungary hit him in the back of the head.

"America, say 'Thank you' to Hungary."

"Thanks, Hungary!" America said with a grin, and Hungary laughed and ruffled her hair. "You're welcome. It was fun."

"Ve~ Sì, I like being a girl! We get to wear pretty clothes and go shopping and wear makeup!"

Everyone turned to look at Veneziana, shock plastered on every one of their faces.

"Hm? Che cosa? Did I do something wrong?"

Spain turned to England. "Amigo, I think you should really consider looking for that cure."

France, Prussia, and China nodded in agreement.

* * *

**Heh heh...I don't even shop at Hot Topic XD**

**Gracias, arigato, grazie, merci, xiéxié, und danke to everyone who's favorited and followed and reviewed! I'd give you all hugs if I could~**


	19. Punishment

It all started...with a burger. Not really. Well, it indirectly involved a burger. Sort of. Actually, it was more about America listening to some Vocaloid songs Japan had told her about. But she was eating a burger.

"IGGYYYYYYYYY!" she called, unaware that she was wearing headphones and the rest of the world wasn't. And also unaware of the fact that England was fast asleep. Was.

"Bloody hell, America! What in the Queen's name is so important?" he snapped, rubbing the back of his head and wincing as the light smacked his pupils.

"I WANNA GO TO A MIKU CONCERT!" she yelled back, still not noticing the plugs in her ears. England walked over to her and plucked them out, ignoring her protests.

"You want to go see the blue-haired cyber girl in concert?"

"Miku!" America corrected, pausing the song. "And her hair's green, not blue."

England looked at the avatar's picture on America's computer screen. "No, it's clearly blue."

"Nuh-uh! In 'Alice Human Sacrifice', they say her hair is green!"

"Why are you listening to songs about sacrifice?!"

"That's not the point! I want to go see a concert!"

"Ask Japan, then. I'm afraid it's out of my hands."

"Ugh! I hate you!" America picked up a pillow, her current weapon of choice, and sent it flying, hitting England square in the (oversized) eyebrows.

"America!" England exclaimed, grabbing the pillow and throwing it back at his colony. He threw it a bit too hard, though, and knocked America backwards on her bed. There was a moment of stunned silence before the little girl began wailing.

"YOU...HIT...ME!" she sobbed, even though no harm had really been done. England ran over to her to try calming her down, but she scooted away. "I'm ***hic*** going to ***hic*** Spain's!"

And with that, she stomped away, leaving behind a very regretful Brit.

**_En la casa de España..._**

France was there with Seychelles and Canada because...well, he's always there. Prussia had brought Germany there because Hungary was there, and Hungary was there because she had brought Veneziana over for a playdate. China, Japan, and Korea were there, too, because his all-knowing dragon boss had foreseen England and America's fight. Which is why he was the only one who wasn't surprised when a splotchy-faced American toddler swung Spain's door off its hinges.

"Mi puerta!" Spain cried in distress, but Prussia said, "Um, Toni? I think we should be worrying more about the CRYING AMERICA ON YOUR DOORSTEP!"

"Sweetie, what happened?" Hungary asked, pulling America into a motherly hug that would have been weird coming from anyone else.

The other little nations stopped whatever they were doing (which involved a lot of running around and words that kids their age shouldn't have known) and ran over to hug America. Italy, especially, glomped her friend rather tightly.

"Ve~ America, what happened to you? Why are you crying? Did someone take away your pasta? Is that why you're crying? Is that why-"

Romana had clamped a hand over her little sister's mouth and proceeded to drag her away from America before she said something wrong.

"America-chan, what happened? It is not like you to cry..."

"E-England h-hit m-me..."

Spain, France, and Prussia immediately sprung up from their seats with a unanimous shout of, "HE DID _WHAT_?!"

"Lovi, get me my axe!"

"West, get me my sword!"

"Mathieu, get me some wine!"

"Japan, Korea, please stay where you are..."

But the Bad Touch Trio was seething with rage. Romana came and threw Spain's axe at him, cursing when he managed to catch it before it chopped his head off. Germany handed her brother his sword and slowly backed away. Canada came and gave France a bottle of wine before scurrying back to her twin's side. Japan and Korea stayed put.

"Vamos, to cut off Inglaterra's eyebrows!"

"Again!" Prussia added, awesomely twirling his sword. France took a sip of wine.

"Wait, you guys!" America called, but they had already left, shouting some ancient Germanic chant that they really didn't want to learn the meaning of.

"...what do we do now that they're gone?" China asked.

"TRASH THE HOUSE!" Romana yelled, and they all went off to do just that.

**_Back at England's house..._**

England knew it would be useless to try and talk to America, so the only option he had was to wait and hope she'd come around.

What he didn't count on, however, was the sudden appearance of a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a Prussian breaking his front door off its hinges.

"My door!"

Spain snapped away from his rage long enough to say, "I know, right?" but then went back to thirsting for England's blood.

"Angleterre, how can you live with yourself after hitting little Amérique?! You disgust me!"

Ouch. Coming from France, that was the worst insult ever. Ever.

"We're going to kill you, awesomely!" Prussia threatened, brandishing his sword like the true warrior he is.

"Sí! For America!"

The other two echoed his war cry and charged, but England just looked on blankly.

"Um, England? We can't be awesome if you don't try and, y'know, fight back."

"Go ahead and kill me. I deserve it. I threw a pillow at her."

Spain lowered his axe and tilted his head to the side. "A...pillow...?"

England nodded in shame. "It was accidental, but...I made her cry..."

France threw an arm around his shoulders, having a sudden change of heart. "Aw, Angleterre! You're such a good older brother!"

England pushed him away and hissed, "Don't touch me, frog."

"Seriously, though, why don't you just apologize to her? The awesome me will help, kesesesese~"

"I don't think she'd forgive me..."

"Of course she will!" Spain promised with one of his signature smiles. "She's a good little tomate~!"

"She's a girl, not a tomato, you git!"

"Doesn't matter! Come, now we go to awesomely apologize to the awesome America!"

Prussia grabbed England's arm and ran back to Spain's house, the two other members of the BTT in tow.

**_And back to Spain's again..._**

Romana and America stood back to admire their work. Hungary and China had split the scene so they couldn't be held responsible, but the Spaniard's house was completely wrecked. There were tomato guts everywhere (courtesy of Romana), and marker all over the walls. Toys were strewn everywhere, and a certain someone had found red spray paint and painted, "TOMATOES ORIGINATED IN KOREA, DA-ZE!" on the wall.

"Ve~ That was fun, but won't Big Brother Spain be upset?"

Romana waved her hand dismissively. "Don't worry about that bastard. He's not going to do anything."

At that moment, the four older nations entered the still-doorless doorway, and were completely paralyzed from what they saw.

"Surprise!" Seychelles greeted, and ran to give France a hug, which he half-heartedly returned.

"¿Qu-Qué pasó?" Spain stammered, momentarily forgetting how to speak English.

"We redecorated, bastard!"

"W-West...?"

"I had nothing to do with it, Bruder," Germany told him, hiding her paint-stained hands behind her back.

England glanced briefly at America, who caught his eye and quickly looked away, and he sighed. "America...?"

"Hmph," was her reply, and she crossed her arms.

"America, love, I'm sorry," he apologized, leaning down to her height. "I didn't mean to hit you. It was an accident, I swear it on the Crown."

America's eyes widened at the seriousness of the swear, and a little smile danced on her lips. "I forgive you. On one condition."

"Anything, love. What is it?"

America stood on her tiptoes and whispered something in his ear, causing the smile to slowly fade away.

**_Later..._**

"Why do I feel like we've been in this exact same situation before?" England groaned, trying his best to wipe the wall clean of Korea's "message".

"At least Amérique has forgiven you, non?"

"Sí. It was worth it, I think, now you and your tomate made up."

"Sucks we didn't get to shave your eyebrows, though...that would've been awesome."

"I'll keep that in mind when you need a favor next, Prussia," England commented, scrubbing away the last "E".

* * *

**That was extremely fun to write XD**

**Oh, and LaBlanc gets a virtual hug, 'cause she used moe and I'm a sucker for adorability. *interwebz hug* ^-^**


	20. Karaoke Night-Part 1

**This was originally intended to be all one chapter, but I realized that chapter would be long as heck. So it'll be split up into 7-9 parts.**

* * *

Everyone was going to China's house, because, apparently, he and Japan had a "surprise" for everyone. Keeping in mind that Hong Kong lived in that house, and also keeping in mind the fact that he was somewhat of a pyrotechnical maniac, they were more than a bit concerned for their fate. The fact that China still held a grudge against the other five older nations for Halloween didn't make them feel any better.

"D-Dude, Iggy, they're n-not gonna blow us up or anything, right?"

"Ve~ Hungary, you'll protect me, sì?"

"Oi, bastard, you'd better save me if anything happens, got it?"

The others trudged by in frightened silence, feeling as if they were headed for the gallows.

When they got to China's house, however, they heard music blasting and saw strobe lights flashing through the windows.

"¿Qué? China actually knows how to have fun?"

England elbowed the Spaniard in the gut. "Shut it, git. He'll hear you." The Englishman took it upon himself to ring the doorbell, and Vietnam came to the door.

"Cháo," she greeted, a smile on her face, before turning back and calling, "Oi! Thailand, Hong Kong, lower the music! They're here!"

Prussia, Spain, France, Hungary, and England exchanged a questioning look but said nothing.

Vietnam took America's hand, who took Canada's hand, who took Seychelles's hand, who took Romana's hand, who grabbed Veneziana's hand, who clung to Germany's arm desperately. They disappeared inside, and the older nations followed wordlessly.

A DJ table was set up in the corner, and Korea was fighting with Hong Kong and Thailand, shouting something along the lines of, "Play Gangnam Style, da-ze!"

An enormous screen was built into the wall, and a bunch of sofas and loungers were placed around it. It looked sort of like...

"Konnichiwa, and welcome to karaoke night, everyone!"

America squealed. "Whoa! Karaoke night? Dude, that's so badass!"

Japan smiled and nodded at her friend. Taiwan stood next to her, and Vietnam led the group over to the seating area, where China was already sitting and eating a dumpling. The little girl then scurried over to the DJ table to join her brothers.

"Okay, here's how this will work!" Japan began, bringing out her inner moe. She had the sailor uniform and everything. "Everyone is going to sing a song! It can be a duet or a trio or a quartet, it really doesn't matter. The winner gets a prize, but everyone must sing!" She sent a pointed glare at England. "We have pretty much any song you can think of, ne, Thailand?" She received a nod from her brother and smiled. "Taiwan and I will go first!"

She signaled to Vietnam, and music began pulsing. Taiwan picked up a microphone and she and Japan began vocalizing as Romaji lyrics flashed across the screen, black on a blood-red background. Japan began singing, perfectly in-tune and on-key.

_"Hajime to owari no iranai imi_

_Kono kokoro no jouhatsu eto_

_Dare ga hinsei wo oboeteru ka?_

_Kyouki no mado kara sayounara_

_Ko, ko, konnichiwa wa, watashi_

_A, a, awanakatta darou?_

_Sa, a, ayounara a, anata_

_Saa hanashi shiyou ka?_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Fusou shisou desu_

_PSYCHoPaTHY_

_Nonki na jinsei_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Owarenai madoi_

_CaPTiViTY_

_Nigerarenai_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Fusou shisou desu_

_PSYCHoPaTHY_

_Nonki na jinsei_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Owarenai madoi_

_CaPTiViTY_

_Odaku ga tsudzuke sou_

_Mitsuketa saigo kiesatte yuku_

_Kuro ni nijinde AUTORAIN_

_Makkurayami ni hikari nado nai_

_Kyouki no oku kara sayounara_

_Ko, ko, konnichiwa wa, watashi_

_A, a, awanakatta darou?_

_Sa, a, ayounara a, anata_

_Saa hanashi shiyou ka?_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Fusou shisou desu_

_PSYCHoPaTHY_

_Nonki na jinsei_

_Insanity_

_Owarenai madoi_

_CaPTiViTY_

_Nigerarenai_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Fusou shisou desu_

_PSYCHoPaTHY_

_Nonki na jinsei_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Owarenai madoi_

_CaPTiViTY_

_Odaku ga tsudzuke sou."_

At this point, the two began vocalizing again, and Taiwan picked up the melody.

_"Ne, doko de atta koto ga nai ka?_

_Ne, itoshii kimi to hanashitai_

_Ne, jikan wa? Kyou wa? Wakaranai_

_Ne! Wasurete shimaeba yokatta_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Fusou shisou da_

_PSYCHoPaTHY_

_Nonki na jinsei_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Yami ka? Hikari ka?_

_iNSaNiTY_

_iNSaNiTY."_

There was a brief pause, and the lights completely blacked out. America screamed, and Veneziana began crying before they came back, now a soft, solid blue instead of the intense red they had flashed before, the screen matching the color perfectly. It didn't take much thought to figure out that Hong Kong was controlling the lights.

_"sAnIty_

_Mou mienai kuro_

_pUrIty_

_Motto nagai hibi_

_sAnIty_

_Sore mo shizumanakya_

_'sAnIty'_

_...tte nani desu ka?"_

The red came back, and Taiwan and Japan sang the last verse together.

_"iNSaNiTY_

_Fusou shisou desu_

_PSYCHoPaTHY_

_Nonki na jinsei_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Owarenai madoi_

_CaPTiViTY_

_Nigerarenai_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Fusou shisou desu_

_PSYCHoPaTHY_

_Nonki na jinsei_

_iNSaNiTY_

_Owarenai madoi_

_CaPTiViTY_

_Odaku ga tsudzukeru-"_

The lights blacked out again, this time followed by a complete, unbearable silence, and America flung herself around England and refused to let go. "Th-That was one creepy-ass song, Japan, and I don't even know what it meant..."

It was at that moment that they realized Japan had tied Taiwan up with duct tape and had miraculously changed out of her sailor uniform into an olive green tanktop and ripped black shorts, a bandanna wrapped around her dark black hair. "Nani? Did you say something, America-chan?" she asked, smiling in a rather Russia-like way.

There was a moment where everyone was afraid to say anything, which Japan ended by asking, "Who's next?"

* * *

**That took FOREVER to write out. I don't own the lyrics to iNSaNiTY, by the way.**

**And thanks for reviewing, everyone~**


	21. Karaoke Night-Part 2

"I wanna go next!" Prussia shouted, springing up from his seat between France and Spain. "Come on, West!"

"Wait, what? Why do I have to come with you?"

"'Cause you're my little sister, ja? So, technically, I can tell you what to do."

"Why does this rule only apply when you want me to do something either extremely embarrassing or extremely stupid?"

"Your awesome older brother commands you to come sing a song!"

Germany facepalmed and sighed. "Fine. What song are we singing?"

Prussia gestured excitedly for her to come over, and he whispered something in her ear, causing her to visually grow paler. She looked at her "awesome older brother" in a mixture of shock and horror.

"I'm not singing that! Have you even seen the video for that song?!"

"Ja. And we're singing it. Awesomely."

"...you're sure there's no way for me to talk my way out of this?"

"Nope."

She sighed again and held out her hand. "Give me a microphone, then."

Together, the two trudged onstage and Hong Kong began playing an upbeat song. The lights began flashing rapidly, and England was ready in case America decided to strangle-hug him again. A disco ball lowered from the ceiling, and little sparkles flickered along the wall. Spain and France suddenly remembered a video Prussia had shown them a while back.

"Ay, mierda..."

"Mon Dieu..."

"JA, IS THIS A PARTY?!" Prussia's voice ricocheted through the house. Hungary's fingers tensed on her frying pan, Spain and France suppressed laughter, and Veneziana "Ve?"d quietly.

"I like German sparkle parties!" the albino nation continued, and Hungary began tapping her foot in annoyance, running her fingers along the bottom of her skillet.

"Sparkle party, sparkle party," Germany mumbled, refusing to look up and blushing fiercely. Prussia lifted her up onto his shoulders and went on.

"I like German sparkle parties!"

"Sparkle party, sparkle party..."

"Very German sparkle party!"

"Sparkle party, sparkle party."

"German German sparkle party!"

"Bruder, please don't make me do this..."

"Keep singing, West! Here, have a beer!"

Germany accepted the beer that was handed up to her and echoed again, "Sparkle party, sparkle party."

Prussia grinned wickedly, and the five older nations watching knew his plan immediately. "Do you like to party party?"

Germany, now flushed from the beer, replied (rather enthusiastically), "Yes, I like to party party!"

"Do you like to dancy dance?"

"Yes, I wore my party pants!" She had not, in fact, worn her party pants, but it was part of the song, so everyone just accepted it and moved on.

"I like German sparkle parties!"

"Sparkle party, sparkle party!"

"Very hardcore German sparkle party!"

"Sparkle party, sparkle party!"

"German German sparkle party!"

"Sparkle party, sparkle party!"

"Hardcore sparkle party!"

"Sparkle party, sparkle party!"

"Yes I wore my rubber boots!"

"Yes I wore my rubber boots!"

"Rubber boots to dancy dance,"

"Rubber boots and party pants!"

Rubber boots magically appeared on Prussia and Germany's feet, and sparkles began shining in their hair.

"KESESESESE~"

Spain and France couldn't hold back their giggles anymore and burst out laughing, tears streaming down their face. Hungary twitched slightly, and England covered America's ears.

"Party pants, party pants," Prussia whispered, which was not a small feat for someone as (obnoxiously) loud as he.

"Sparkle party, sparkle party," Germany chorused, still rocking from her brother's shoulders.

"Feels good to dance,"

"Feels good to dance,"

"Very nice to dance,"

"Hardcore dance,"

"Hardcore dance,"

"Hardcore dance!" They finished their song and bowed. Veneziana applauded enthusiastically, and Spain and France clapped their hands together, still laughing like Britain had just told them he had a girlfriend.

"That was tres magnifique, mon ami!"

"Sí, good job, amigo!"

"Ve~ Germany, your face is really really red!"

"That was so stupid," England, China, and Hungary commented simultaneously. Prussia eyed Hungary's frying pan suspiciously, but said nothing except, "I thought it was pretty awesome."

"You're not supposed to get your own sister drunk, you git!"

"Hey, it wouldn't have worked if she wasn't drunk!"

"What did you put in her drink?!" China asked, unsure if he wanted to know the answer.

"I just spiked it with a little vodka, courtesy of Russia," Prussia stated with a twisted grin. Then, "We'll have a real German sparkle party, and it'll be hardcore and awesome at the same time."

* * *

**I strongly advise taking Prussia's last sentence to heart, my dear readers.**


	22. Karaoke Night-Part 3

**103 REVIEWS?! I know that doesn't seem like a lot, because there are people with more, but it means SO MUCH to me! What is this? I don't even...**

**ALL THE AUTHOR FEELS! I love you all *sniff* My readers all get interwebz hugs! *hugs* And they're free, too! Thank you guys so much T^T Getting all emotional over here...**

* * *

After Prussia and Germany's..."sparkle party", Germany had totally crashed and was asleep on Prussia's lap, her little brain unable to handle whatever the hell it was that Prussia had put in her beer. Not that it was completely proper for her to be drinking beer at such a young age, but Prussia was too awesome to care.

"So who's next?" Japan asked, climbing back onto the stage, redressed in her sailor uniform rather than her outfit for when she'd sung her song.

Spain and France would have gone, but they still randomly giggled every so often, so they were out.

"I want to go!" came a small, unfamiliar voice. Everyone immediately turned towards Canada, who shrank down in her seat from all the attention and pointed at the baby polar bear standing on her lap, who had, evidently, been the one to speak.

"Um...Kumajiro-chan? Do you have the ability to sing...?"

"Of course!" the bear sniffed indignantly before turning to Seychelles. "Help?"

The little island nation smiled and nodded, and the two made their way up to the stage, where Japan handed them microphones. Out of nowhere, Kumajiro donned sunglasses with Canadian flags on the lenses and a Canada hoodie, not unlike the one Canada herself usually wore. Seychelles was dressed the same.

"Cue the music!" the animal called, and the lights began slowly pulsing to the steady bass of a song, alternating red and white. A screen rolled down from behind them, showing a single picture of that special flag.

"Yeah I know that you wanna be Canadian please, even if in winter, things tend to freeze, we've got the world monopoly on trees and our country's bordered by three different seas!"

Seychelles took over then (even though he wasn't Canadian), singing, "Yeah I know that you wanna be Canadian please! We invented the zipper, we've got expertise, we made insulin to combat disease, yeah I know that you wanna be Canadian please!"

Then the two faced the audience and, smiling rather widely, sang in unison, "The Brits have got the monarchy, the US got the money, but I know that you wanna be Canadian!"

At this, America muttered, "There's gonna be no money left if this British jerk keeps taxing me like crazy...", to which England replied, "It's your duty as a colony!", resulting in quite the yelling match between the two.

Ignoring them, the current performers continued. "The French have got the wine and cheese, koalas chill with the Aussies, but I know that you wanna be Canadian!"

France, who had been drinking a glass of wine, said, "It's true, non?"

Seychelles dropped out and Kumajiro sang, "Et si ce n'était pas assez, on a deux langues officielles: L'anglais et le français, ooh la la." She winked at France and England and went on. "Yeah I know that you wanna be Canadian please, where else do you find mounted police? And go to the hospital and not pay fees-"

"Yeah I know that you wanna be Canadian please," Seychelles cut in, and Kumajiro stepped back and let him have the stage. "And when freshwater is in high demand, we've got the world's largest supply on hand, so you know that we could make a pretty good friend, but it's even better if you can be…"

Kumajiro reentered and flung her arm around Seychelles shoulders, and they said, "So you're thinking to yourself, 'How do I live in this beautiful country?' Well, we have some steps for you to follow..."

The screen switched from the Canadian flag to a plain white screen with "STEP ONE" printed on it in black.

"Step one: Lose the gun!"

"It's a good thing Switzerland isn't here..." China remarked as the screen changed to "STEP TWO".

"Step two: Buy a canoe!"

"A canoe?" Spain echoed. "How expensive are they?"

The screen switched to "STEP THREE", followed by, "Step three: Live multiculturally..."

Fireworks exploded on the screen, and the two yelled, "Step four: You're ready, there is no more!"

Kumajiro cut in front of Seychelles and sang again, "We've got buffaloes, caribou and moose, we got beavers, bears, and Canadian goose!"

As each animal was listed, they flashed on the screen, replaced finally with a picture of Celine Dion that made Veneziana start crying all over again. Seychelles sang sheepishly, "And we're sorry about Celine Dion, but she did do that good song for James Cameron..."

Kumajiro joined in once again, and they sang for the last time, "The Brits have got the monarchy, the US got the money, but I know that you wanna be Canadian! The French have got the wine and cheese, koalas chill with the Aussies, but I know that you wanna be Canadian! The Greeks chilled out with Socrates, can't build a wall like the Chinese, but I know that you wanna be Canadian! In Kenya they've got safaris, we've missed lots of other countries, but I know that you wanna be Canadian!"

As they sang the last line, they stood back to back and crossed their arms, and the music ended.

Their performance was rewarded with quite a bit of applause, and Canada gave Kumajiro a big hug when she came off of the stage. Surprisingly, the bear didn't ask her usual question, instead hugging her owner back. Seychelles was pulled into the hug somehow, and Spain and China Aww'd.

America came over and wrapped her arm around her sister's shoulders, asking, "Can I be a Canadian, please?"

* * *

**On a completely unrelated note, you know the restaurant Macaroni Grill? The full name is "Romano's Macaroni Grill" XD I loled.**


	23. Karaoke Night-Part 4

"Ooh! Ohhhh! Pick meeeeeee!" America whined, waving her hand frantically.

"Um...America-chan? You know you don't have to ask, right...?"

"I don't?" America stared at Japan. "Oh. Well, I'm going next." She picked a leather jacket up from the couch (how it got there is a mystery) and slid it on, along with a pair of black sunglasses. England was slightly concerned.

Japan placed the microphone back in the stand and hopped down from the stage just as America strutted onto it. "Korea, you gonna sing backup?"

Korea nodded happily and bounced onstage next to America, donning a fedora and a similar leather jacket, a bass strapped around her shoulders. America began playing her guitar, and the two sang together, "Say, hey!"

Then America leaned over to her microphone and began, "Hear the sound of the falling rain, coming down like an Armageddon flame, a shame-"

"Hey!" Korea cut in for a second, before backing out again.

"The ones who died without a name!" England couldn't help but feel as if she was looking straight at him as she sang that line, but she went on before he could think about it for too long.

"And the dogs howling out of key, to a hymn called 'Faith and Misery'-"

"Hey!"

"And bleed, the company lost the war today!" Again, England couldn't shake that feeling...

In unison once again, the two sang, "I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies! This is the dawning of the rest of our lives...ON HOLIDAY!"

Korea dropped out again, and America took over. "Hear the drum pounding out of time, another protestor has crossed the line-"

"Hey!"

"To find, the money's on the other side!"

England couldn't take it anymore. "Are you trying to tell me something, America?!"

She, however, ignored him and continued with her song. "Can I get another Amen?"

"Amen!" came Korea's reply.

"There's a flag wrapped around a score of men-"

"Hey!"

"A gag, a plastic bag on a monument!"

Korea joined her again, and they reentered the chorus. "I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies, this is the dawning of the rest of our lives...ON HOLIDAY!"

Seeing as there was a painfully long guitar solo then, America sent a snarky grin England's way as she plucked at the strings. Prussia "Kesesesese~"d quietly, but stopped abruptly when the British nation glared at him.

The solo ended, and Korea gripped the sides of her microphone, which now sounded more or less like a PA system. "The representative from America has the floor."

America shot another glance at her bushy-browed guardian and said (it wasn't really singing anymore), "Sieg Heil to the president gasman, bombs away is your punishment! Pulverize the Eiffel Towers-"

France spit out his sip of wine. "WHAT?!"

"Who criticize your government! Bang, bang! Goes the broken glass and..."

She paused briefly and smiled at England again before going on. "Kill all the f*gs that don't agree, trials by fire setting fire, is not a way that's meant for me, just 'cause, just 'cause, because we're outlaws yeah!"

For the last time, Korea jumped in and they laughed, America's arm around the other's shoulders (though somehow, the guitar kept going...). "I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies, this is the dawning of the rest of our lives! I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies, this is the dawning of the rest of our lives..."

The two jumped up and did a split in the air, like the true rockstars they are. "THIS IS OUR LIVES ON HOLIDAY!"

They finished playing the final chords, and Prussia, Spain, and France leapt out of their seats and applauded like crazy. The girls let their instruments hang loosely around their little bodies and bowed, leaping off the stage.

"Hey, Iggy, what's wrong?" America teased. "You look worried 'bout something."

"Are you going to rebel on me?!"

"Wouldn't dream of it," America told him absentmindedly, brushing a microscopic speck of dust off of her jacket.

"Kesesesese~ Ever need help rebelling against eyebrows, just call us, ja?"

"You wankers are just waiting for her to revolt, aren't you?!"

* * *

**I love how, whenever someone reviews and tells me to update, I have an update ready. So I check my email and I'm just like, "Oh, cool, I can read minds!" :D**


	24. Karaoke Night-Part 5

**A'ight, 'fore I begin, I wanna make a shoutout to IntraSule and sol jones for their epic songfic ideas involving PruHun and Canada ("Missing" by Evanescence for the latter, "I For You" by the All-American Rejects for the former). I will be writing oneshots for both of those, but I really rather wouldn't put them in this fic because it's rated for humor and I don't wanna put something too serious in here :P**

**Although I kinda contradicted myself with this chapter. Gomen na sai, it's a tad overdone, I know. Forgive me, por favor ;A;**

**Oh, and in case you were wondering (not naming names or anything), America and Korea's song was "Holiday" by Green Day. I thought it fit rather well, although I may have been mistaken...**

* * *

"You know what?" England huffed, crossing his arms. "I'm going to show all you gits how a true gentleman performs."

"At an impromptu karaoke session?"

"No one asked you, Spain!"

The Brit stomped onto the stage, muttering spells under his breath. A mysterious violin case appeared in the corner of the stage, and England opened it and pulled out a beautiful violin, painted proudly with the Union Jack. He settled it beneath his chin, raised the sleek black bow to the strings, and nodded at Thailand. A background instrumental started, and he drew the bow along the strings.

"I used to rule the world," he began, focusing solemnly on his fingers, as if he had forgotten the others were there. "Seas would rise when I gave the word, now in the mornings I sleep alone, sweep the streets I used to own..."

Ordinarily, the other elder nations would have snickered a bit at that, but they were mesmerized by the sudden change of personality. England kept playing, still rather quietly, as he sang, "I used to roll the dice, feel the fear in my enemies' lies, listen as the crowd would sing, 'Now the old king is dead, long live the King!' One minute I held the key, next the walls were closed on me, and I discovered that my castles stand upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand."

America began sniffling, and Canada handed her a tissue.

Still completely blocked off from the world, England held his bow with grace and chorused, "I hear Jerusalem bells a-ringing, Roman cavalry choirs are singing, be my mirror, my sword and shield, my missionaries in a far-off field." Then, "For some reason I can't explain, once you were gone, it was never, never an honest word...but that was when I ruled the world."

France dabbed at his eyes with his handkerchief, and Japan blew her nose as England entered another moment of just violin, dragging the bow lightly across the strings with ease.

"It was a wicked and wild wind, blew down the doors to let me in, the shattered windows and the sound of drums, people couldn't believe what I'd become."

Veneziana swore she saw tears forming in the nation's eye, and her sister next to her was crying silently as well. Confused, the little Italian girl started crying too, but her tears remained silent.

"Revolutionaries wait, for my head on a silver plate, just a puppet on a lonely string. Oh, who would ever wanna be king?

"I hear Jerusalem bells a-ringing, Roman cavalry choirs were singing, be my mirror my sword and shield, my missionaries in a far-off field. For some reason I can't explain, I know Saint Peter won't call my name, never an honest word...but that was when I ruled the world."

Again, the melody was plunged into solely instrumentals, and England began playing with a bit more vigor, jerking the bow back and forth across the strings, totally immersed in what he was doing. After a moment or two, the track providing the missing instruments' parts went into vocals, someone who sounded more or less like England (he must've prerecorded it). England himself played the matching notes on his violin, switching back to the fluid, natural movements.

Then, once more, still playing those repeating notes, it was, "I hear Jerusalem bells a-ringing, Roman cavalry choirs were singing, be my mirror my sword and shield, my missionaries in a far-off field. For some reason I can't explain, I know Saint Peter won't call my name, never an honest word, but that was when I ruled the world..."

The music slowed, and England's arm matched the tempo, playing the last few notes in a way that made them barely audible, before finally coming to a stop. "Oh, that's right, you lot are - OW!"

The last part was the result of an epic tackle-hug from a certain colony of his, who had run onstage and was currently clutching his pant leg and sobbing uncontrollably. "I'm *hic* really *hic* sorry, England! I'll never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever be bad ever ever again!"

England smiled, leaned down, placed his violin carefully next to him, and gently pried her off of his leg. "Shh, love, don't cry. And don't make promised you can't keep."

America looked up at him and gave a small grin through her tears. "But those are the best kinds!"

* * *

**"The Amazing Spider-Man", anyone?**


	25. Karaoke Night-Part 6

**I'm soooooo sorry for all the long author notes. I know you guys are just here for the fic, but I've got some stuff to say, so... :/**

**Anyway, let me get this out of the way so you can all enjoy the next chapter:**

**It seems a lot of people have suggestions to make about this segment-thingy (it's a segment, right?), and I'm totally cool with that. In fact, it makes me feel special, so I encourage it. But I'm wondering, should I just make this really long? If anyone wants me to write a chapter for a character who hasn't necessarily been a part of this yet, you can. It won't hurt my feelings, because songfics entertain me. Just leave a review if you want a chapter for, say, Austria, or Russia, and I'll try and accommodate. And if you just want me to write for the characters already mentioned here, then I will. It's up to my readers, because what's a writer without her readers?**

**Thank goodness I got that out of the way. Two more things to say, and then I'm done.**

**1) Reading Trains the Mind-THANK YOU SO MUCH. That's happening, mark my words. You get a cookie.**

**2) IntraSule-YES. OH MY FREAKING GOSH YES. That's happening too. Here, you can have a cookie as well.**

**Okay, I'm done for now. Here's the chapter :3**

* * *

"It's going to be hard to top that," France remarked. "Who knew Angleterre could sing so beautifully?"

"I know, right?" America exclaimed from her older brother's lap. "It doesn't match his personality at all!"

Before England had the chance to say anything back, China stood up from his seat on the sofa. "I'll give it a try next."

Prussia laughed. "Kesesesese~ Wow, China, I didn't think you had it in y - OW!"

The reason for the sudden outburst was due to the fact that China had hit a certain Germanic nation over the head with his trusty wok. He placed the cooking utensil back on the sofa and calmly walked onto the stage. "Korea, Japan, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Vietnam and Thailand, will you help?"

The six little nations all cavorted onstage to join their older brother. Korea had her bass, Japan was tuning a guitar, Hong Kong and Thailand rolled out a keyboard and a soundboard and stood stationed behind them. Vietnam had a keytar, and Taiwan sat behind a drum set.

China nodded to Korea, who began playing a procession of notes, until Japan joined in with some chords that America recognized, being a guitar player herself.

Taiwan took up the drum beat, Vietnam and Thailand began pressing down keys, and Hong Kong controlled the sound as China began singing.

"Rising up, back on the street, did my time, took my chances. Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet! Just a man, and his will to survive!

"So many times, it happens too fast: you trade your passion for glory. Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past, you must fight just to keep them alive!"

Japan and Korea leaned over to sing backup as China entered the chorus. "It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight! Rising up to the challenge of our rival, and the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night, and he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger!"

America and Canada began giggling uncontrollably as there was a short instrumental fill, and England had to shush them.

"Face to face, out in the heat, hanging tough, staying hungry!"

Prussia perked up at the word "hungry", mistaking it for another similar-sounding word.

"They stack the odds still we take to the street, for the kill, with the skill to survive!

"It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight, rising up to the challenge of our rival! And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night, and he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger!"

There was another instrumental break, and France leaned over to Spain and whispered, "I wonder who the 'rival' is?", causing them both to go silent in thought.

"Rising up, straight to the top! Had the guts, got the glory! Went the distance, now I'm not gonna stop, just a man and his will to survive!

"It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight, rising up to the challenge of our rival! And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night, and he's watching us all with the eye-" Here he paused and held the note, which was really no small feat. "Of the tiger!"

The little nations took over with their instruments then, and China entered with, "The eye of the tiger" four (and yes, America counted) times.

When Japan had played the last note, everyone clapped, still surprised that China would do such a thing, and all seven of them bowed. Spain whispered to France, "I think it's Russia", causing the other nation to nod in agreement.

The younger Asian nations cleared the stage for the next performer, and China walked over and took back his sofa seat.

"Dude, China, that was awesome!" America squealed. "I didn't know you were that cool!"

Korea appeared next to her and said, "Me neither, da-ze! Why aren't you like this all the time, Aniki?"

"Because you all drive me insane," was his curt response.

* * *

**Well, I just spent the last hour listening to "Eye of the Tiger" on repeat XD**


	26. Karaoke Night-Part 7

**I must say, I'm rather proud of this chapter.**

**Oh, and I don't have anything to say now! Yay for short author notes!**

**I did tweak the lyrics just a tiny bit, because it wouldn't have fit otherwise~**

* * *

"Alright bastards," Romana said, crossing her arms. "Let me show you how it's done."

She stormed onstage and picked up an electric guitar from a stand, causing Japan to wonder aloud, "Where are all of these instruments coming from...?"

"Oi, America, get your ass up here and play drums. You too, sorellina, play bass."

"Okay~" Veneziana came and stood next to her sister, America not far back. The North American nation tapped a beat in on her drumsticks, and Veneziana began plucking at the strings.

Romana tapped her foot for a few brief moments, the scowl temporarily disappearing from her features as she joined in the playing. Several seconds later, she actually started singing.

"I wake up every evening...with a big smile on my face. And it never feels out of place!"

As she said "place", she shot a mischievous grin at Spain, who smiled uneasily back.

"And you're still probably working at a nine-to-five pace. I wonder how bad that tastes?"

Spain's eyes widened as he recognized the song his little tomato was singing, and Romana gave a short laugh when she saw, before continuing.

"When you see my face, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you walk my way, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell!

"Now, where's your picket fence, love?"

"Love?" England scoffed. "She's Italian." But Prussia quickly silenced him, finding Romana's performance extremely entertaining.

"And where's that shiny car? And did it ever get you far? You never seemed so tense, love! I've never seen you fall so hard, do you know where you are?

"And truth be told, I miss you..." She smirked at Spain again and continued. "And truth be told, I'm LYING! When you see my face, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you walk my way, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you're a man who's worth a damn, I'll treat you well, but you're a fool, it's just as well, gives you Hell!"

She played a little riff on her guitar before going on. "Tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself, 'Well, where'd it all go wrong?' But the list goes on and on. But truth be told, I miss you...and truth be told, I'm LYING!

"When you see my face, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you walk my way, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you're a man who's worth a damn, I'll treat you well! But you're a fool, it's just as well, gives you Hell!"

Romana's scowl returned as she glared at Spain and sang, "Now you'll never see, what you've done to me. You can take back your memories, they're no good to me! And here's all your lies, you can look me in the eyes, with that sad, sad look that you wear so well...!"

She and Veneziana let their instruments hang loose around their necks, and America smacked her drumsticks to the beat as the three sang in unison, "When you see my face, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you walk my way, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you're a man who's worth a damn she'll treat you well! But you're a fool, it's just as well, gives you Hell!"

The other two dropped out and went back to playing their instruments as Romana sang once more, "When you see my face, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you walk my way, hope it gives you Hell, hope it gives you Hell! When you hear this song, you can sing along, but you'll never tell, and you're a fool, I'm just as well, hope it gives you Hell! When you hear this song I hope it will give you Hell, you can sing along, I hope that it puts you through Hell."

She finished with one last condescending smile and stuck her tongue out at Spain, who only smiled.

"Ah, Roma~ That was a cute song~"

"It wasn't meant to be cute, bastard! God, you're so damn stupid!"

"Kesesesese~ You're a genius, Romana!"

Veneziana wore her usual spacey look and went back over to sit in Hungary's lap, turning to look up at her guardian.

"Ve? Hungary?"

"Hm?" The brunette looked down at the little redhead. "What's wrong, Veneziana?"

"What's 'Hell'?"

* * *

**I lied, I do have one thing to say XD**

**So far, I've been asked to have chapters up for Poland and Russia. Anyone else?**


	27. Karaoke Night-Part 8

**Omaigawd, this has been going on FOREVER. And it's not even halfway finished yet. Not that I mind, but I hope you guys like songfics...**

**I know I said I wasn't going to do this song for Canada, but I did. England got his moment, so I figured, "Why not?" So shoot me.**

**And I'm sorry it's so short. Someone go and kill algebra for me? Please?**

* * *

"Um, excuse me?" Canada raised her hand shyly, shrinking back when everyone turned to face her.

"Oui, ma chérie? Would you like to go and sing next?"

Canada nodded mutely, and America practically shoved her onto the stage.

"Um...thanks, sis..."

"No problem! It's what I do!" the American replied with a grin. "Need help with anything?"

Canada shook her head quickly. "No...I'm fine."

She took note of her sister's slightly hurt look, but said nothing, instead nodding back at the DJ table. Sounds - like soft whispers - resounded around the room, chilling their bones. "Can you stop the fire? Can you stand to fight her? You won't stop the fire. You won't say the words."

Canada brought the microphone up to her little mouth and began singing.

"Please, please forgive me, but I won't be home again. Maybe someday you'll look up and, barely conscious, say to no one, 'Isn't something missing?'"

It seemed everyone in the room was frozen, perhaps out of surprise, or perhaps out of awe at her solemnly beautiful voice. Regardless, all anyone could do was stare at the shy girl, who hardly stopped for very long, as if she were reading poetry.

"You won't cry for my absence, I know, you forgot me long ago! Am I that unimportant? Am I so insignificant? Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me?"

Still in a state of shock, France opened and closed his mouth, trying to say something but unable to find the words to do so. Canada saw him, but ignored it and moved on.

"Even though I'm the sacrifice

You won't try for me, not now, though I'd die to know you love me, I'm all alone. Isn't someone missing me?"

The whispers started hissing their message again, before Canada reentered.

"Please, please forgive me, but I won't be coming home. I know what you do to yourself. I breathe deep and cry out, 'Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me?'

"Even though I'm the sacrifice, you won't try for me, not now, I'm all alone. Isn't someone missing me?

"And if I bleed, I'll bleed knowing you don't care! And if I sleep, just to dream of you, I'll wake without you there! Isn't something missing? Isn't something...?"

America swore she saw a tear glisten as it rolled down Canada's cheek. The little blonde's heart immediately broke.

"Even though I'm the sacrifice, you won't try for me, not now! I'm all alone. Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me...?"

"Can you stop the fire? Can you stand to fight her? You can't stop the fire. You won't say the words," the whispers finished. Canada hurried off the stage, only to be tackled by a sobbing America before she could get back to her spot.

"Sis...you're crushing my ribcage..."

"DON'T LEAVE ME!" the other girl cried. "IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIlov eyouIloveyouIlo-"

"America. Breathe," Canada ordered, and America did so.

"Ma chérie, do you really feel like that?" France asked, genuine concern tinging his words. Canada looked down sheepishly at her feet.

"Oui, frêre, sometimes..."

"You don't have to feel like that, da-ze!" Korea exclaimed, flinging an arm around Canada's shoulders and causing the smaller girl to teeter backwards. "Here, have some chocolate! It originated in Korea, da-ze!"

Canada took the offered chocolate bar and looked at the label.

"It says 'Made in Switzerland'..."

* * *

**YAY, fluff!**


	28. Karaoke Night-Part 9

**Okay, that was exhausting. Hungary is officially the hardest character to find a song for EVER. At first, I was going to do "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani, but then I was going to make it "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga, then I was going to do "Begin Again" by Taylor Swift, but I didn't want to put any pairings in, ****_then_**** I was going to do "Breakaway" by Kelly Clarkson, before FINALLY settling on this. Thank/blame Pandora for the idea. It took me FOUR HOURS to come up with this.**

**Canada's song was, by the way, "Missing" by Evanescence. A couple people asked, so I just thought I'd include that.**

* * *

After America was sat quietly in England's lap (though she was still hiccuping softly), clutching Canada's hand tightly and causing the other North American to fidget uncomfortably, Hungary stood up.

"I think I'm going to take my turn now."

"Tch," Prussia scoffed, folding his arms behind his head and leaning back in his armchair. "This should be g - HEY!"

Hungary swiftly wiped the bottom of her frying pan after hitting her dear, dear friend Prussia sharply over the head with it and set it down where she had just been sitting before making her way onto the stage.

"You know," she said with a grin, "I may need the girls' help for this one."

At that, England and China paled. The BTT, as oblivious as ever, merely handed their female charges over, along with Veneziana, America, Vietnam, Korea, and Japan.

Romana and Veneziana had microphones, Germany was playing on the keyboard, America and Japan held guitars, Korea was on bass, Vietnam had a keytar, and Canada was on drums.

"Erm, Hungary?" England piped up. "Should we be worried?"

"Probably," was her response, but she nodded at Vietnam and Germany to start before the guys could say anything else.

"You say that I'm messing with your head!" she began, a pair of Prada sunglasses magically appearing over her eyes, complimenting her over-shoulder t-shirt and jeans rather nicely.

Wait, what?! She was just wearing a dress!

"Yeah yeah, yeah yeah!" the Italies sang together.

"All because I was making out with your friend!"

"Yeah yeah, yeah yeah!"

"Love hurts, whether it's right or wrong!"

"Yeah yeah, yeah yeah!"

"I can't stop, 'cause I'm having too much fun!"

"Yeah yeah, yeah yeah!"

"You're on your knees, begging please, stay with me. But honestly, I just need to be a little crazy!"

All of them sang in the chorus, laughing openly at the boys' idiotic expressions. "All my life I've been good, but now, ooooh I'm thinking, 'What the hell?' All I want is to mess around! And I don't really care about, if you love me, if you hate me, you can't save me, baby, baby! All my life I've been good, but now, whooooa, what the hell?

"What? What? What? What the hell?"

The little girls dropped out and Hungary continued. "So what if I go out on a million dates?"

"Yeah yeah, yeah yeah!"

"You'll never call or care anyway."

"Yeah yeah, yeah yeah!"

"I'd rather rage than sit around and wait all day!"

"Yeah yeah, yeah yeah!"

"Don't get me wrong, I just need some time to play-yay!

"You're on your knees, begging please, stay with me! But honestly, I just need to be a little crazy!"

"Crazy!" Romana and Veneziana echoed, before they all reentered again.

"All my life I've been good, but now! Ooooh, I'm thinking, 'What the hell?' All I want is to mess around! And I don't really care about, if you love me, if you hate me, you can't save me, baby, baby! All my life I've been good, but now! Whoooa, what the hell?"

The Italy sisters vocalized softly in the background, "La la la, lalala la laaaa! Whoa, whoa! La la la, lalala la laaaa! Whoa, whoa!" as Hungary sang,

"You say that I'm messing with your head, boy, I like missing in you, man, yeah, I am messing with your head, when I'm messing with you in bed!"

The chorus exploded for the last time, and all eight of them sang (quite nicely, it might be added) at the top of their lungs.

"All my life I've been good, but now! Ooooh, I'm thinking, 'What the hell?'" The Europeans echoed the last line before joining the others again.

"All I want is to mess around, and I don't really care about!"

"I don't care about!" Vietnam, Japan, and Korea repeated for a moment, until they jumped back in as well.

"All my life I've been good, but now, ooooh I'm thinking 'What the hell?' All I want is to mess around, and I don't really care about-"

"If you love me!" Canada and America beamed as they sang, and Hungary winked at them.

"If you love me!" The others dropped out, all becoming her backup as they shouted, "NO!"

"If you hate me!"

"NO!"

"You can't save me, baby, baby! All my life, I've been good, but now, whooooa, what the hell?"

Smirking rather cheekily at the dumbstruck male nations, she finished up with a short, "La, la, lalalalala la la, la, lalalalalala la!"

Hong Kong, and Thailand applauded loudly from the DJ table, and the girls quickly cleared the stage and marched triumphantly back to their seats. On her way, Hungary stuck her tongue out at Prussia, who was still not quite sure whether he should have been amused, concerned, or both.

* * *

**That is the _only_ time I will _ever_ use Avril Lavigne for _anything_. EVER.**

**Girl power, all the way.**


	29. Karaoke Night-Part 10

"Ve~ Can I go next? Please?" Veneziana hadn't left the stage with the other girls. "I just thought of a song!"

Japan nodded. "Hai, you can sing your song next, Veneziana-chan."

"Yay! Big Brother Spagna, can I borrow your guitar?"

Spain snapped out of his Avril Lavigne-induced trance and looked at Veneziana. "¿Qué? Mi guitarra, oh, sí, you can use it." Spain produced an acoustic guitar from nowhere and handed up to North Italy.

"Ve~ Grazie, fratello. I don't need a track if I have the guitar."

The usually-bubbly girl was acting uncharacteristically serious, and everyone wondered what song she would sing.

In answer to their unspoken questions, she began strumming and, after a few notes, she leaned forward and began.

"Na na na na na naa, na na na na na naa, na na na na na na na naa.

"Grew up in a small town, and when the rain would fall down, I'd just stare out my window. Dreaming of what could be, and if I'd end up happy, I would pray."

Everyone was shocked at how different her voice was when she sang. It was beautiful and clear, and almost...melancholic. She was like England, however: once she started, it was like she was in a different world.

"Tried so hard to reach out, but when I tried to speak out, felt like no one could hear me. Wanted to belong here, but something felt so wrong here, so I'd pray, I could breakaway!

"I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly, I'll do what it takes, 'til I touch the sky! And I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change, and breakaway. Out of the darkness and into the sun, but I won't forget all the ones that I love. I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change, and breakaway."

Veneziana was too focused on hitting the right chords to notice, but nearly everyone watching her was in tears. Even Prussia, who had said before that he was "too awesome" to cry, was sniffling and blinking rapidly (although he'd never admit he had cried at Canada's song as well). Veneziana continued.

"Wanna feel the warm breeze, sleep under a palm tree, feel the rush of the ocean. Get onboard a fast train, travel on a jet plane, far away, and breakaway!

"I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly, I'll do what it takes, 'til I touch the sky, and I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change, and breakaway. Out of the darkness and into the sun, but I won't forget all the ones that I love, I've gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change, and breakaway."

The little Italian girl's spacey look had returned, although it wasn't air-headed as per usual. Instead, it seemed calm and at peace, perhaps with just a trace of underlying determination. Her gaze was still completely concentrated on her fingers, though, which began moving quicker and more forcefully as she moved away from the short instrumental break.

"Buildings with a thousand floors, swinging 'round revolving door, maybe I don't know where they'll take me, but I've gotta keep moving on, moving on, fly away, breakaway!"

The pace of the song slowed down after that, and Veneziana's eyes actually opened all the way for the first time in a while, shining with hope and solemnity.

"I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly, though it's not easy to tell you goodbye, I gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change, and breakaway."

She sounded as if she was on the verge of crying as she sang the last verse.

"Out of the darkness and into the sun, but I won't forget the place I come from, I've gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change, and breakaway...breakaway...break away."

She finished the song with a final flourish and strum of the strings, before she bowed and smiled through joyful tears at the applause she received. She ran off the stage, dropping Spain's guitar beside him as she went, and hopped into Hungary's lap, allowing her guardian to run her hands through her hair.

"Oi, sorellina!" Romana caught her attention from next to her. "Where the hell did you learn how to sing like that?"

Veneziana shrugged. "I don't know. Was I good?"

Romana turned pink and looked away, muttering something that only her sister heard.

"Yeah...yeah, you were."

* * *

**Alright, well, sorry for not updating yesterday. I burned my finger with a hot glue gun :P**

**We have fanart~ Courtesy of the lovely and talented LaBlanc, also known as WhiteMaid on deviantART. Here's the link:**

** gallery/#/d5l87i2**


	30. Karaoke Night-Part 11

**Once upon a time, there was a Spain-obsessed authoress who just wanted to write and make people happy. Then, one day, she was writing when she had to find a theme song for Spain, and ALL HER LOVE FOR HIM WAS REPLACED WITH ANNOYANCE AND HATRED. And that's how this chapter came to be. Happy Thanksgiving, I'm going to bed.**

* * *

"Vale, I'm going to go next!"

"What?!" Romana jumped off the sofa and pointed an accusatory finger at a certain Spaniard. "You can't go, bastard! You're not allowed!"

Spain tilted his head. "¿Por qué, mi tomate?"

Romana crossed her arms. "'Cause you're too goddamn stupid."

France rolled his eyes and pretty much shoved Spain onto the stage, throwing a microphone at him despite the fact that there was already one there.

Before the beat started, Spain smiled and said into the microphone, "For my little tomato~", causing Romana to roll her eyes and stick her tongue out at him.

As soon as the music picked up, Spain's simple t-shirt and jeans changed into a full-out matador's outfit, complete with a cape and sword and everything.

"Um, where are you all getting your costumes?" a confused Vietnam asked from the DJ table. Thailand shrugged at her and donned his headphones as Spain began.

"De lunes a domingo voy desesperado, el corazón prendido en el calendario, buscándote y buscando como un mercenario, tú dime dónde estás que yo no te he encontrado!"

For some reason, Prussia and France understood the lyrics, and Romana and Veneziana had a general idea of what Spain was singing about. Romana suddenly became concerned at the mischievous smirks she was receiving from the other two members of the Bad Touch Trio.

"Tus manecillas giran yo voy al contrario, comiéndome la vida a sorbos y a tragos, me viste así de frente que tremendo impacto, para unirme a tu mirada dime si hay que ser..."

China joined in with Romana's concern when a mechanical bull rose up from somewhere below the stage, and Spain drew his sword against it as France and Prussia cheered.

"Torero, poner el alma en el ruedo, no importa lo que se venga, pa´que sepas que te quiero, como un buen torero, me juego la vida por ti~!"

While Romana was looking away, a hint of a blush spreading across her cheeks, France and Prussia grabbed her on each side and nearly threw her, obscene protests and all, up onto the stage, right onto the bionic bull's back, where she let loose a short scream and clung on for dear life.

"BASTARDS, I'M GOING TO KILL ALL OF YOU!"

Spain ignored her and continued, "Si hay que ser! Torero, poner el alma en el ruedo, no importa lo que se venga, pa´que sepas que te quiero, como un buen torero, me juego la vida por ti!

"Y te cuentan que ya me vieron en solitario en un callejón, que ya no duermo y desvarío que el humor, ya me cambió, y tó por dónde estás que mi presión ya no me va, te buscaré, vuelve conmigo y que tú no sabes!"

Veneziana and America cheered for Spain as the bull charged at the red cape he was using to taunt it. Romana had ceased screaming in fear and was focusing on not falling off. England and Hungary chose to take China and leave the room to prevent the Asian nation from strangling someone as Spain went on with his song.

"Que yo te necesito como el perro al amo, que si tú no respondes, aquí todo es caos, me viste así de, frente que tremendo impacto, para unirme a tu mirada, dime si hay que ser..."

Once more, the bull charged at Spain, who had his sword at the ready. Veneziana waved her white flag frantically in an attempt to stop her brother from "killing" the bull, but Seychelles, Taiwan, Canada, America, France, Prussia, Hong Kong, Korea, Thailand, Japan, Germany, Vietnam, and Romana were booing and telling him to slay the beast. Spain grinned and sang the last verse as he stuck the sword in the bull's "back".

"Torero, poner el alma en el ruedo, no importa lo que se venga, pa´que sepas que te quiero, como un buen torero, me juego la vida por ti!"

Whoever was left hollered and whooped as the bull sunk back below the stage, leaving a heavily panting Romana to be picked up by the star matador. As soon as he did so, she punched him in the...never mind.

"You...you ASSHOLE! I could've died! And all you were doing was singing a goddamn song that no one even understood because it was in your damn language! What do you have to say for your stupid self?!"

Spain chose not to point out the fact that he had, technically, "saved" her. Instead, he gave her a hug and smiled, ruffling her hair. "Mi tonta tomate, did you even listen to the lyrics?"

The blush returned to her face, this time deeper and more furious, as she pushed him away from her and avoided his gaze. "Sì, I did. But that doesn't change the fact that you almost killed me!"

Spain just laughed and carried her off the stage, where Veneziana proceeded to glomp her and begin sobbing into her shoulder.

"Sorella! I was so scared! Big Brother Spain, you're like a hero!"

Romana whacked her softly on the back. "No, he's not! He's a bastard!"

"Ohonhonhonhonhon~ L'amour est partout~"

* * *

**Pardon my French XD I don't speak it, blame Google Translate if it's wrong.**

**This song is "Torero" by Chayanne. Veneziana's was "Breakaway" by Kelly Clarkson.**

**Oh, right, I'm thinking of doing guides like this for other characters. The main one I had in mind would've been something along the lines of "Poland's Guide to Being, Like, Totally Fabulous!" or something. Would anyone read if I did?**


	31. Karaoke Night-Part 12

**It's sucky, but I felt the need to update something. So here ya go.**

* * *

"It looks like I'm the only one left, non?"

"Oh, God, no!" England's eyes widened in fear. "Should we send the kids out of the room?"

"Um, after the rebellion America incited, I don't think it'd be much of a problem."

"Fair point," England remarked, acknowledging Hungary's comment. "Let's get the frog's song over with."

France winked at England and beckoned to Prussia, who smirked and pretty much jumped onto the stage alongside France. The Frenchman nodded at Hong Kong, who looked bored as usual, and England poised his hand in a ready position, prepared to shield America's eyes if needed.

A party-like beat (that made England want to scoop out his eardrums with a plastic spoon) began thumping, and Hungary and China also suddenly became concerned for their charges' innocence. China glanced back at Hong Kong and Thailand nervously, glad that Vietnam had opted to take a bathroom break as France began singing in a strangely unaccented voice.

"I know you want me, I made it obvious that I want you too! So put it on me, let's remove the space between me and you! Now rock your body, damn I like the way that you move! So give it to me, oh oh, 'cause I already know what you wanna do!"

England was tensed and ready to shut America's eyes at a moment's notice, taking Canada to be his responsibility as well. Hungary and China looked about ready to do the same, with Hungary looking out for Romana, Seychelles, and Germany too, as Spain had gone to change out of his matador outfit.

"Here's the situation: been to every nation, nobody's ever made me feel the way that you do! You know my motivation, given my reputation, please excuse me I don't mean to be rude..."

France winked at England before going into the chorus. The Englishman bit back some colorful insults.

"But tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know...

"You're so damn pretty, if I had a type then baby it would be you! I know you're ready, if I never lied, then baby you'd be the truth!"

Let's just say, all of the little nations had hands held over their ears.

"Here's the situation: been to every nation, nobody's ever made me feel the way that you do! You know my motivation, given my reputation, please excuse me, I don't mean to be rude...

"But tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know..."

France backed out as Prussia came up front and began...rapping? Thankfully, the kids' ears were still covered and he was rapping too fast to actually be comprehensible, so everyone else was somewhat safe.

"Tonight I'm gonna do, everything that I want with you, everythin' that you need, everything that you want I wanna honey, I wanna stunt with you, from the window, to the wall, gonna give you, my all! Winter 'n summertime, when I get you on the springs, I'm gonna make you fall! You got that body, that make me wanna get on the boat, just to see you dance, and I love the way you shake that ass!

Turn around and let me see them pants, you stuck with me, I'm stuck with you, let's find something to do, please excuse me, I don't mean to be rude-"

At this point, France cut back in and reentered the chorus. Hungary, China, and England deemed it fit to stop shielding the little nations, who were, by now, a bit frustrated and confused. Mostly frustrated.

"But tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! Oh, you know, that tonight I'm loving you! That tonight I'm loving you... Yeah!"

France and Prussia finished by standing back to back, and the young nations applauded out of politeness and obliviousness.

"Tch," England scoffed. "Leave it to the frog to pick a song that just repeats the same thing over and over again."

"Oh, Angleterre, you know you loved it~"

"SHUT UP, FROG!"

* * *

**"Tonight (I'm Lovin' You)" by Enrique Iglesias. Hoo-rah.**

**About Poland's guide, it'll happen. Eventually after I get through this segment of this fic, I'll go on to the other. I swear it.**

**Buenas noches~**


	32. Karaoke Night-Part 13

**GYAAHH, I'm sorry France was such a disappointment. I feel like I let all of you down. I just COULDN'T find a song for him, for some reason, so I settled on something shitty. I'm sorry. I'll rewrite it if anyone wants me to.**

**Here's an apology gift. At least, I hope it's a gift.**

* * *

China looked around. "I think that's everyone, isn't it?"

At that instant, Hungary's cellphone went off. She fished it out of her pocket and answered the call.

"Hello? Oh, Poland, it's you. What's up?"

She became aware of the others' curious stares and shifted uncomfortably. "Um, we're at China's... Doing what, you ask?"

The Slavic nation looked to China for guidance. The oldest waved his hand dismissively, and Hungary explained to Poland what they were doing.

"Mhmm...mhmm...mhmm...now? I don't think that's...oh, you're here? Well then-"

Her words were cut off by the obnoxious, continuous ringing of China's doorbell. Vietnam and Hong Kong raced to answer it, although both were beaten by Thailand.

Standing there were none other than the great Lord Polska and his partner-in-crime themselves.

"Like, hey you guys~!" the blonde greeted, practically skipping into the house and dragging Lithuania behind him by the wrist. "We're here to sing a song!"

The six older nations groaned in protest, but the younger ones all looked at Poland and Lithuania expectantly.

"Like, don't worry. The song has, like, a lesson for all the little girls."

That didn't exactly help with anything. Any "lesson" taught by Poland usually ended up terribly for everyone involved. Exhibit A, the prank war.

Poland scoffed. "You should all be, like, thankful for my presence. It hurts that you, like, don't trust me enough to, like, sing a song."

"Yeah, well, trusting you results in a sheared England and a crying idióta," Hungary remarked.

"Hey!" Prussia yelled back. "I do NOT cry!"

"Then how'd you know I was talking about you?"

The Germanic nation flushed red and sat back down, muttering something about "damn stupid Hungary the Homo". Hungary shot him a glare to shut him up before turning back to Poland. "If you're going to sing, let's get this over with."

"Yay! Come on, Liet!"

Poland and Lithuania took their places on stage, Poland dressed in a pink, white, and chocolate brown swirled...dress. Of course. Lithuania was dressed similarly, but had been permitted to wear a tuxedo instead of a knee-length, strapless dress. The colors and style were the same, however.

Poland quickly folded a piece of paper into a mini-jet and threw it at the DJ table, where Vietnam, Hong Kong, and Thailand nearly pushed each other over to get a view of it. Hong Kong sent a thumbs-up at Poland and flipped a switch, and a beat started shaking the house. China, England, and Hungary became immediately concerned.

"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge. My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge."

Lithuania turned a brilliant shade of pink as he mumbled along to the words shamefully. Spain, France, Prussia, Hungary, England, and China all sent him sympathetic smiles as Poland flung his arm around his commonwealth buddy and went on.

"I know you want it, that thing that makes me, what the guys go crazy for! They lose their minds, the way I whine, I think it's time!"

"What the bloody hell is this?" England wondered aloud. China facepalmed. Hungary averted Veneziana's eyes from the dance Poland was doing.

"La la la la la, warm it up! La la la la la, the boys are waiting! La la la la la, warm it up! La la la la la, the boys are waiting!"

Lithuania produced a blender from nowhere and, glad to be pardoned from the song, began scooping ice cream - also from nowhere - into it.

"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge. My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge."

Lithuania finished the milkshake and gave it to Poland before going back and making another one, now about as red as Spain's tomatoes.

"I can see you're on it, you want me to teach the techniques that freaks these boys. It can't be bought, just know thieves get caught! Watch, if you're smart..."

Poland began drinking the milkshake and standing hip-to-hip with the still-blushing Lithuania, who tried his best to scoot away.

"La la la la la, warm it up! La la la la la, the boys are waiting! La la la la la, warm it up! La la la la la, the boys are waiting!

"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge. My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge."

France was finding the entire thing mildly entertaining. England glared daggers into the back of France's head and covered America and Canada's eyes for the second time in under ten minutes.

"Oh, once you get involved, everyone will look this way, so you must maintain your charm, same time maintain your halo! Just get the perfect blend, plus what you have within, then next his eyes will squint, then he's picked up your scent!"

Poland finished his milkshake and set it down at the edge of the stage. Somewhere at the DJ table, a certain three Asian mini-nations were doubled over in laughter.

"La la la la la, warm it up! La la la la la, the boys are waiting! La la la la la, warm it up! La la la la la, the boys are waiting!

"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge! My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, 'It's better than yours.' Damn right, it's better than yours! I could teach you, but I have to charge..."

He and Lithuania finished back-to-back, and Lithuania ran backstage. Romana, Japan, and Germany applauded. Veneziana, America, and Canada tore their respective elder nations' hands away from their eyes.

Poland and Lithuania came off the stage, dressed back in their normal garb (for Lithuania, at least).

"What the hell was that?" Prussia asked.

"That was, like, a lesson for the girls," Poland explained about as vaguely as possible with a wink. "Like, Hungary understood, I'm sure."

Five male heads turned to look at the brunette questioningly. She raised her hands in innocence. "It's kinda weird that you want to know..."

China and England blushed and switched the direction of their gaze towards the ground. Prussia gave a failed attempt at a laugh before following suit, and Spain and France cleared their throats and turned around.

There was a moment of awkward silence, until it was broken by America and Japan singing to the beat of "Milkshake" from the DJ table, "My Pokémon cards bring all the nerds to the yard, and they're like, 'You wanna trade cards?' Damn right I wanna trade cards! I'll trade my Pikachu, but not my Charizard!"

The six older countries stared at the two little ones, aghast. Poland produced another milkshake and slipped on a pair of Prada sunglasses, despite the fact that they were inside.

"See? Japan and America, like, totally have the right idea."

* * *

**Yay for Poland, everyone's favorite crossdresser, and my personal twin brother. Erm, sister? Hell, I don't even know.**

**"Milkshake" by Kelis. Shoutout to Reading Trains the Mind for the idea. I sincerely hope this is the song you were talking about.**


	33. Karaoke Night-Part 14

**Ideally, I would've used "Rasputin" in this chapter, but I was feeling parodic. And cracky. So here.**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

"_Now_ are we done?" Hungary asked warily.

"I think so..." England replied slowly. "Unless someone else wants to come and join the bloody party."

As if on cue, the doorbell rang. America and Korea ran to answer it, both girls (and Poland) screaming when they saw none other than Russia, Belarus, and Ukraine.

"We heard there was a karaoke party~" Russia said happily. Everyone immediately turned to glare at Poland, who sunk down to hide behind the couch. "Um, sorry?"

Hungary groaned and facepalmed. "We're going to be here all night..."

"Ni, I'll make it quick," Ukraine promised, winking at her friend before running back to the DJ table to talk to Hong Kong and Thailand.

The six older nations and Lithuania watched curiously as a screen lowered on the stage. Russia stopped his hushed conversation with Belarus in time to see the dimly-lit room transform into a nearly realistic field of sunflowers. Russia's eyes widened as he took in the vibrant blue, green, and yellow walls. He even dropped his pipe in shock.

To top it all off, a perfect double rainbow flashed onto the screen. Belarus slipped away from her awestruck brother and joined her sister onstage, taking her place behind a drum set. Ukraine was standing at an electric keyboard. She began playing a few melodious notes, and Russia seemed to join in almost subconsciously.

"Whoa, that's a full rainbow, all the way. Double rainbow, oh my God, double rainbow. It's a double rainbow all the way..."

"Damn," Romana whispered, also, evidently, captivated by the rainbows, along with the majority of the younger countries.

"It's a double rainbow all the way-"

"Damn."

"Oh my God. What does this mean?" Russia wandered onto the stage and took up the microphone, his gaze never leaving the screen.

"It's so bright, so vivid. Double rainbow, double rainbow, it's so intense! What does this mean? It starting to look like a triple rainbow!"

It really wasn't, but they all just went with it anyway. And no one really wanted to argue with Russia.

"That's a whole rainbow, man, aaahhhh!"

From somewhere, Estonia and Latvia had appeared with a soundboard, and they auto tuned Russia's unintentionally-musical voice into a song, as well as adding in a beat.

"Double rainbow all the way, 'cross the sky! Yeah, yeaaaaah~ So intense! Double rainbow all the way, 'cross the sky! Wow, wow, OHMIGAWD, look at that rainbow!"

Tears filled the future-largest nation's eyes, and he began sobbing joyously into Belarus's dress. The younger girl wasn't sure whether to be delighted or disturbed.

"Double complete rainbow," Russia sobbed, his voice still somehow being amplified by the microphone. "Oh my God, it's just..." The tears kept coming, before he wiped them and took out a camera, aiming at the (unbeknownst to him) faux rainbows.

"Oh my God, it's...I can't even capture it on my camera!"

The beat started again, and Russia seemed to realize that he was actually singing. He didn't stop gaping at the rainbows, though.

"Double rainbow, all the way 'cross the sky! Yeah, yeaaaaah~ So intense! Double rainbow all the way, 'cross the sky! Wow, wow, oh my God, look at that rainbow!"

The tempo slowed down, and Russia looked back once more at the rainbows, smiling happily through his tears and pumping his fist as he cheered, "Whoooo! WHOOOOOOOO!"

Romana, still mesmerized as well, commented, "That is the baddest fucking rainbow I have ever seen."

Veneziana, America, Canada, Korea, Japan, Germany, Seychelles, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Vietnam, and Thailand broke out in applause, also blinking back tears. England, Hungary and China were glad to actually have a clean song for the kids to listen to. They could easily overlook the few curse words.

"I hate to say this, Russia, but good job," China commended. Russia didn't notice, however, as he had latched himself onto the screen and was mumbling contentedly in Russian. Belarus took the opportunity to attach herself to her brother's arm, but he was too far gone in his own happy little Russia-world to pay her any heed.

* * *

**"Double Rainbow" by The Gregory Brothers. If you haven't heard it, please go look it up. Like, now. Or Warsaw will, like, totally become your capital.**


	34. Karaoke Night-Finale!

**For the sake of time (and my sanity), this is going to be the last chapter in the "Karaoke Night" segment...thing. I'm totally up to starting a multichapter songfic if anyone wants, but I swear, my brain is now 85% random song lyrics.**

* * *

After they managed to pry Russia away from the screen and change the room back to how it was, China pulled out his cellphone and checked the time. "Aiyah! It's two in the morning! How have we not fallen asleep yet?!"

"Probably the stockpile of Mountain Dew that magically disappeared in an hour," Spain pointed out.

"Oh...right." China took a sip from his own bottle of the green soda. "I'm still not sure how that got there."

Korea burst out giggling, and China shot her a glare. She stopped and cleared her throat. "Are we done now? I'm not tired yet, da-ze!"

"I think we are..." France said, glancing around. "The doorbell seems safe."

Just then, the baby bag Hungary carried around for Veneziana began rustling. Astonished, she flipped over the flap and peered inside...

...only to have a blonde head pop out and look around with curious green eyes.

"Hallo!" Liechtenstein greeted happily, a grin set upon her face. "Wow, Mr. China, your house is so cool!"

Prussia laughed nervously. "Um, Liechtenstein? Switzerland...he, er, knows you're here, right? 'Cause the awesome me wasn't planning on dying today."

Liechtenstein shook her head, crossed her arms defiantly, and gave a mischievous/accomplished smirk. "Nope! I snuck out, all by myself! I've been here the entire time!" She turned to England as if suddenly remembering something. "Oh, Mr. England, you're a really, really good singer!"

England blushed. "Oh, well, erm, thanks..."

Hungary rolled her eyes and turned to Liechtenstein, putting on her best stern face. "Lilli, you know it's not good to sneak out. And Switzerland will kill us all if he finds out you did. Come on, we're done now, I'm taking you home."

Liechtenstein pouted. "Oh, but Ms. Hungary, since I'm here, can I sing a song? Pretty please?"

Hungary sighed. "Fine. But make it quick, okay?"

Liechtenstein nodded and looked around. "Hm...I need...Veneziana, and America!"

Said countries jumped up eagerly and walked onstage, happy to be a part of the last act. Liechtenstein nodded to the DJs, who began playing a rather giddy, bubbly track. Liechtenstein took the microphone and began swaying (adorably) to the beat. America and Veneziana were backup singers.

"I'm just a little bit caught in the middle, life is a maze, and love is a riddle, I don't know where to go, can't do it alone, I've tried, and I don't know why...

"Slow it down, make it stop, or else my heart is gonna pop!"

At the word 'pop', something above them snapped and confetti flew down. China turned to glare at Hong Kong.

"'Cause it's too much, yeah it's a lot, to be something that I'm not! I'm a fool, out of love, 'cause I just can't get enough~!"

Romana, Canada, Germany, and Japan found themselves tapping their feet to the beat. Spain began subtly snapping his fingers.

"I'm just a little girl, caught in the middle, life is a maze, and love is a riddle, I don't know where to go, can't do it alone, I've tried, and I don't know why... I'm just a little girl, caught in the moment, I'm so scared, but I don't show it, I can't figure it out, it's bringing me down I know, I've got to let it go...and just enjoy the show."

Hungary began moving her heel in time to the upbeat rhythm and smiled as Liechtenstein went on.

"The sun is hot, in the sky, just like a giant spotlight! The people follow the sign, and synchronize in time... It's a joke, nobody knows, they've got a ticket to that show, yeah!"

At that, England joined in and started subconsciously tapping his foot as well.

"I'm just a little bit caught in the middle, life is a maze and love is a riddle, I don't know where to go, I can't do it alone, I've tried, and I don't know why...

"I'm just a little girl lost in the moment, I'm so scared, but I don't show it, I can't figure it out, it's bringing me down, I know, I've got to let it go...and just enjoy the show! Just enjoy the show..."

Prussia and France began clapping their hands to Liechtenstein's beat of cuteness. The blonde girl smiled and went on, bouncing slightly as she sang.

"I'm just a little bit caught in the middle, like is a maze and love is a riddle, I don't know where to go, I can't do it alone, I've tried, and I don't know why...

"I'm just a little girl lost in the moment, I'm so scared, but I don't show it, I can't figure it out, it's bringing me down, I know, I've got to let it go...and just enjoy the show!"

Everyone whistled along as Liechtenstein, America, and Veneziana sang, "Dum de dum, da dum de dum, just enjoy the show! Dum de dum, da dum de dum, just enjoy the show!"

With the aid of the lyrics flashing on the screen, everyone in the room joined in for the final verse.

"I want my money back, I want my money back, I want my money back, just enjoy the show! I want my money back, I want my money back, I want my money back, just enjoy the show!"

Every nation there cheered (even the still-rainbow-crazed Russia) as the three little girls bowed and bounced off the stage, leaving Japan to take over.

"Arigatogozaimashita, everyone! The winner of the karaoke night-"

"Wait, what?" Spain interrupted, looking confused. "It was a competition?"

"Hai, Spain-san..." Japan told him. "I said that before we started..."

Prussia scoffed. "It's obvious the awesome me one. As if there were any question about it."

"I thought I did pretty well..." Canada said, though no one heard her.

Within seconds, a fight had broken out between all of them, with Russia "kolkolkol"-ing quietly in the corner. Eventually, China fought his way onto the stage and took the microphone.

"ALL OF YOU, GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

That got them all to shut up and look at the fuming Asian nation, conclude that they didn't want to cross him, and leave faster than you could say "-aru".

* * *

**Yay, it's over~ Lilli's song was "Thw Show" by Lenka. Grazie to Reading Trains the Mind (again. We should be partners in crime)**

**I'm sorry I didn't do the Nordics, or Austria, but I just couldn't take it anymore . Gomen na sai...**

**VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITE ACT! The winner will be announced next chapter (hopefully)!**


	35. Camping

**And the winner of the karaoke night is...*fanfare***

**WE HAVE A TIE, LADIES AND GENTS! Between Spain and England! Congrats to both of them!**

**Not that any of you really care, but my band director gave me this solo called "Romanza Appassionata" and OH MY GOD THE SPAMANO INSPIRATION.**

**Anyway, I'm done ranting.**

**For the lovely IrishMaid, who actually thought of this :P**

* * *

The Thursday following the karaoke night at China's house, Hungary suggested they all take a camping trip into the woods via a six-way phone conversation. Prussia, Spain, England, and China happily agreed, but France wasn't so keen on the idea.

"I don't know about the rest of you," he sniffed. "But spending three days surrounded by trees, bears, and bugs isn't exactly my idea of fun."

"Oh, come on," Hungary insisted. "At least come for Canada and Seychelles?"

France huffed. "Fine. For them."

Which is how they found themselves assembling at Hungary's house the next day, sleeping bags packed and ready to go. China had brought along only Japan, Korea, and Taiwan, because Thailand, and Hong Kong had all come down with the flu, and Vietnam had to take care of them.

They piled into China's abnormally spacious, enormous van and England's minivan. Veneziana managed to con Hungary into letting her go with Germany, meaning the female nation had to go with the three members of the Bad Touch Trio. England and China sent her sympathetic looks as they climbed in the minivan with Japan, Korea, America, and Taiwan. Romana, Canada, Veneziana, Germany, and Seychelles went with France, Spain, Prussia, and Hungary.

**In the BTT's van...**

"Kesesesese~ Hungary, cheer up! You're in the awesome van!"

Hungary crossed her arms. Just her luck to be stuck sitting next to Prussia. "I would rather've gone with England and China..."

Veneziana piped up from the back. "Ve~ Ms. Hungary, you're not happy?"

Hungary turned back to look at the little redhead and smiled. "I'm happy if you're happy, Vene. Don't worry."

"Ha, so you are happy!"

"Shut up, idióta!"

For the remainder of the ride, Hungary became progressively happier. The kids were entertaining, Prussia's stupidity was hilarious, and they passed the four hours up the mountain singing delinquent German rock songs and Spanish pop music, blasting out the open windows. Romana's constant yelling at Germany added onto the effect.

"Fusososososo~ Feeling better, Hungría?"

Hungary, being the badass tsundere she is, promptly disagreed, but France smiled from the driver's seat and winked at her in the mirror. She glared back.

**Meanwhile, with England and China...**

Much to both England and China's chagrin, Korea had insisted on blasting "Gangnam Style" on repeat, and she, Japan, Taiwan, and America were doing the dance for what seemed like the hundredth time, though it was really only the eleventh.

"Can you four please listen to something other than that bloody awful song?" England asked from the passenger seat.

Korea pouted, but pressed the pause button. Japan then proceeded to take out her iPod. "I have a song we can listen to."

America looked over her fellow nation's shoulder to see the name of the song and grinned as "Fukkireta" began playing. All four joined Teto in singing at the top of their lungs. What made it even better? It was the ten hour loop.

**Four hours later...**

By the time the (extremely looooooong) car trip was over, England and China felt the need to stick their heads in a beehive. The inhabitants of the other van came out in considerably higher spirits.

"Oh, Angleterre, why are you looking so upset?"

"Shut up, frog. Let's just set up the camp."

They unloaded the vans and let the kids explore as they set up the tents and managed to get a fire going. America and Romana had a tree-climbing competition, but Canada ended up winning in the end.

By the time the adults had finished setting everything up, the sun was going down and the lovely twilight mood was falling upon everyone. Well, except for America and Japan, who could only think about the Legend of Zelda game.

"Alright," Hungary said, plopping down on one of the logs she and Prussia had dragged over. "Marshmallows and hot dogs for all!"

"HUZZAH!" America cried, running over and falling excitedly onto the log beside Hungary. The other nations followed, France still sniffling slightly at the thought of being forced on the trip.

They roasted marshmallows and hot dogs and laughed, just enjoying themselves and swatting at mosquitoes as the sun sank and darkness set in. When it had disappeared completely, Japan took out a flashlight and turned it on, holding it up to her face eerily.

"Let's tell scary stories!"

"Where did you get that flashlight?" China asked, though he was ignored due to a certain American girl running over to England and leaping onto his lap.

"OhmygodIggysavemethehotdogsw ereatrapIdon'twanttohearascarystory HELPPPPPPPPPPPP!"

She stood on the very confused England's lap and buried her face in his shoulder. He patted her back awkwardly and pulled her down into a sitting position. "It's...erm...okay?"

She rubbed her eyes and sniffled. "Just not too scary, okay, Japan?"

Japan grinned evilly. "No promises, America-chan. Okay, who wants to go first?"

Korea raised her hand and began her story. "Once, there was a lawnmower-"

"TOO SCARY!" America interjected. Korea rolled her eyes.

"Chicken," she muttered, before beginning again. "Okay, FINE, once upon a time, there were three girls in the forest, da-ze. They were exploring on a field trip, and were being totally bitchy, so they left their class, da-ze. They went into the woods and out popped a massive, ten-foot beast with enormous feet, da-ze!" To add onto the effect, Korea stretched her arms above her head, made claws, and "roared". America clutched England's shirt.

"The thing swooped down, opened its mouth, and bit their heads off one by one, da-ze. Since everyone hated them, no one cared when they found the bodies. The end, da-ze."

The other thirteen stared at her as she finished her story, the silence being broken only by the sound of rustling in the woods. America immediately yelped and threw her arms around England, digging her nails into his skin.

"OH MY GOD IT'S BIGFOOT WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!"

Although they wouldn't admit it, the other nations felt a little pang of fear in their veins as well, though not necessarily for the same reason as America. It was unlikely that the rustling was Bigfoot, but there were bears in the forest...

Japan's hand flew to the hilt of the katana she kept hidden beneath her kimono. Spain's axe materialized in his hand, Canada clutched Kumajiro, Germany whipped out a pistol, Prussia and Hungary unsheathed their swords, and China notched an arrow in a bow as England comforted the hysterical America.

"Onii-sama, since when are you an archer?"

Korea shushed Japan and put on her PSY glasses, prepared to Gangnam Style the shit outta some bears.

However, as the rustling grew closer and closer, what popped out was even worse than a bear or Bigfoot.

"Like, hey you guys!"

All fourteen nations groaned in exasperation as Poland appeared in the clearing, Lithuania close behind.

"What the bloody hell are you doing here?"

Poland scoffed and examined her - sorry, his - manicure. "Obviously, I'm camping. What does it look like I'm doing?"

"Well, you can leave now," Romana spat. Poland glared at her.

"WAIT!" America cried, hopping off England's lap. "If Bigfoot comes, he'll eat Poland first! Let him stay!"

The six older nations pondered this for a moment before Prussia said, "Yeah...okay. Sure, whatever."

Poland wasn't sure whether to be happy or sad, so he just said, "Like, sweet!" and popped a marshmallow in his mouth. The creepy stories went on, with no particularly outstanding ones, and then they relinquished to their tents, China and his siblings in one, England and America in the other, Prussia and Germany in the next, Veneziana and Romana in another, Hungary in one, Poland and Lithuania in the last. Spain preferred to sleep "debajo las estrellas", as he put it.

They were awoken a few hours later by a very girly scream from Spain. England, Hungary, Prussia, France, and China ran out to find an actual Bigfoot towering over the Spaniard. Within a few seconds, weapons were drawn and Poland and Lithuania were keeping the kids back...

...until Bigfoot's "head" came off to reveal a very familiar face.

"Russia!" they all whined, and said country grinned.

"Privyet! I thought I would come surprise everyone on your camping trip!"

England facepalmed and stalked back into his tent, muttering something about "bloody Russians".

France swatted a mosquito and sniffed indignantly. "I swear, I am never going camping again."

* * *

**"Fukkireta" by the UTAU Kasane Teto. If you haven't heard it, go look it up.**

**Another rant you don't care about:**

**I'm thinking of writing a guide for Japan as well, titled, "Japan's Guide to Being a Closet Otaku".**


	36. WHAT THE AWESOME?

**Haiiiiiiii everyone! :3**

**Um...I don't think I have too much to say...this chapter was a half-request for the lovely LaBlanc...ish. So...yeah.**

**Also, I might not be updating every day or every other day for a week or two, since I'll be playing my trombone until my face finally falls off and they decide to show some mercy (maplepancakes99, I hope that answers your question).**

**There will be more camping! Just...not now.**

* * *

England had called together Prussia, Spain, France, Hungary, and China for an urgent meeting. At two thirty in the morning. Of course, they had to bring along the kids, who were fast asleep in various rooms around the house.

"Angleterre, is there a reason you found it a good idea to wake me up so early?" France huffed. "I need my beauty sleep."

"Oh, shut it, Frog. If you must know, I happened to find a bloody _excellent_ reason to call you lot here. I've figured out how to change the kids back."

The five of them stared at him.

"Seriously?" Hungary asked in disbelief. "Do it, then!"

"Now, wait a sec-"

"No, I'm too awesome to wait! Hurry up and change them!"

"Hold on! There are certain terms you need to be aware of befo-"

"Inglaterra, it doesn't matter. Anything for los tomates, sí?"

Four heads nodded in agreement with Spain, and England sighed.

"Don't blame me if you're dissatisfied with the results." He rubbed his hands together nervously. "I hope I remember the spell correctly..."

China raised a worried eyebrow, but the other four were watching England expectantly as he began reciting a spell in some strange language. The moment he had finished, a flash of light momentarily blinded them all. When it had passed, the six of them were...

"WHAT THE AWESOME?! Spain, why do you...why do I...Hungary where are your-"

"Finish that sentence and I'll kill you," a considerably lower voice threatened from someone who looked almost exactly like Hungary, only...male...

"Why the DEVIL are we women?!" England gasped and grabbed her throat. "Why is my voice so high? Why do I need glasses?! China, why haven't you been affected?!"

"I _have_, báichī!"

"Are you sure, amigo? Er...amiga?"

England clutched the sides of her head. "Everyone stop talking for a moment, I need to think about this."

France was really the only one who hadn't voiced a complaint. "I think we all look rather nice as women. And Hungary, you're quite attractive, mon chéri. Not that you weren't before."

At that moment, who happened to walk in? Why, it's none other than America, Canada, Japan, Korea, Romana, Veneziana, Germany, Taiwan, and Seychelles, all completely unchanged. Prussia groaned.

"Ugh...they haven't even been switched back!"

All nine little nations gaped at their guardians for a moment. Then, several things happened at once. Germany and America screamed and ran to the other side of the house, and Romana grabbed Veneziana and ran after them, shouting frantically, "NO MORE HAIR BRAIDING!" Canada hid behind her sister, and Korea covered her mouth to hide her laughter. Japan blushed and mumbled something in Japanese before shuffling quietly away, following the Italies, America, and Germany. Taiwan and Seychelles walked away calmly and went back to bed, blaming their "hallucination" on the amount of candy they had consumed before bed. Eventually, Germany, America, Japan, Romana, and Veneziana returned.

"Why are you guys...girls? And why is Hungary a guy?" America asked, trembling slightly.

"Ask England," China growled, glaring at said Brit with a look that could've seriously injured a tiger.

England sighed. "I was trying to change you all back, but I messed the spell up. I mean, we would've probably all become gender-swapped anyw-"

"WHAT?!" the other five yelled, ad England rolled her eyes.

"That's what I was trying to tell you, but you gits just don't listen..."

"Well, bastards...er, bitches, that's great, but I'm going back to bed now. I expect breakfast to be ready when I wake up."

With that, Romana left.

"Ja..." Germany stuttered, still not over seeing female Prussia. "I...I think I'll be going back now too..."

Veneziana gave Hungary a hug before leaving. "Ve~ I still love you, Hungary!"

America, Japan, and Korea stayed behind once they had left, but it wasn't long before they had dozed off. England and China felt strangely...motherly, with America fast asleep in the former's lap and Japan and Korea sleeping soundly against the wall next to China, who was stroking both of their hair.

"Anyone have any plans?" Spain asked.

"At this point, I don't think we have too many," France replied. "If you ask me, we should just go along with it and hope for the best. Angleterre, don't you have some brothers you can ask for assistance? What about Norway or Romania?"

Hungary visibly tensed up at the mention of Romania, but couldn't badmouth him before the doorbell rang. They all went to answer it, leaving Korea, America, and Japan in the other room.

"Like, hey guys!" a familiar voice greeted as they answered the door. "We, like, saw lights and heard stuff coming from over here and we thought you were, like, having a party and forgot to invite us so...wait..."

Poland studied each of them carefully before stepping back in horror, nearly pushing Lithuania off the front steps.

"OMG! What happened?! Hungary, like, why are you a guy? England, Prussia...whaaa?!"

The blonde was obviously thoroughly confused. England began.

"Well, it's sort of a funny story, really..."

Poland raised his hands in surrender. "I'm actually totally fine with, like, not knowing. If you need me, I'll be, like, trying to deal with the mindfuck. Later."

With that, he spun around, grabbed Lithuania, and stomped down the steps, slamming the door behind him.

* * *

**Oh, right, Japan's guide is officially published! Poland's is on the way, I swear it!**


	37. At the Beach!

**I had wayyyyyyy too much fun with this XD**

* * *

One day, while America was taking a nap, England's doorbell rang. The now-female nation went to answer, only mildly surprised when Spain, Prussia, and France barged into her home. The British country sighed.

"I should be used to this by now, shouldn't I?"

Ignoring her question, Spain announced, "We're going to the beach!"

"The beach? Now? I just put America down for her nap..."

"Non, not now," France scoffed. "Tomorrow. First thing in the morning. We're meeting at my place."

"But...we don't have bathing suits..." England pointed out, going slightly red in the face.

"Of course we do!" France grinned mischievously, and England became concerned for her innocence. "I had an entire line of them made. Co-created by Veneziana and Romana, of course." France brought her fingers to her lips and whistled. Instantaneously, the two little Italians rolled an enormous rack into the house, stuffed with bathing suits of different designs and styles. England was about to argue that they didn't have her size before seeing that there was EVERY size. Seriously.

France walked over to the rack and pointed out who the different clothes were specifically designed for. "These are more of yours and dear China's type," she said, gesturing to a group of rather adorable one-piece suits. England took note of one with the Union Jack plastered on the front.

"These are suited more for Spain and Prussia," France continued, moving to another area of the rack with a mixture of different styles, each showing a bit more skin than the ones before. "And then these are for moi," she went on with a smirk, pointing to a cluster of bikinis. "Although, Angleterre, I do think this one would rather nice on you as well..." She pulled a hanger from the rack and held it up to England to size her up. The Brit paled before blushing fiercely.

"That's nothing more than a strip of fabric!"

"Exactly," France said with a wink, replacing the "strip of fabric". "We've also had quite a fair amount made for the little girls and Hungary, Chelle, and Taiwan. I'll call them all over now!"

Within ten minutes, everyone had flocked to England's house and was picking out their bathing suits of choice. America was just happy she didn't have to take a nap.

* * *

The next morning, as previously arranged, everyone arrived at France's house at precisely nine in the morning. The Frenchwoman herself was wearing a black bikini with a pink sarong tied around her waist, tortoiseshell designer sunglasses resting on her forehead. Canada had opted for a little red-and-white-polka-dotted one-piece that frilled out at the end like some sort of water tutu, Kumajiro in a similar styled suit, only pink. Seychelles was wearing simple, sky blue swim trunks.

England had taken the Union Jack one-piece, and America was wearing a cute, navy blue two-piece with lacy red trim and little fireworks exploding all over it.

China had brought only Korea, Taiwan, and Japan (again), since Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam were having some sort of mini-Olympics among themselves. The oldest Asian nation was wearing a panda-printed two-piece that didn't exactly qualify as a bikini but came rather close. Japan's white one-piece fluttered with feathery pink cherry blossoms let loose from the hint of a branch peeking in from the side. The top to Korea's two-piece was a fusion of red and blue, like on her flag, and the bottom piece was white with small black accents. Taiwan had immediately fallen in love with a pair of red swim shorts, highlighted by a green dragon swirling up the right side.

Spain had settled on a red and green bikini, the top being the green half and the bottom being the red. Romana, on the other hand, was forced into a (quite adorable) two-piece with the first piece being colored with the three colors of the Italian flag and the second being diagonally striped with the same colors.

Needless to say, Veneziana was dressed identically to her sister, and Hungary was wearing deep green swim trunks with pink hibiscus Hawaiian-style print, a simple white t-shirt on top.

Prussia had found a simple, white, rather low-cut one-piece with the words "I'm AWESOME!" written in black block letters. Germany's choice was a violet and pink polka-dot one-piece with a puppy on front.

When they had all assembled and Spain, China, Prussia, and Hungary had all found their sunglasses, they piled into the cars with the surfboards and buckets and shovels and sand toys and towels and extra changes of clothes. And, of course, the aspirin.

It wasn't long before they were at the beach, and the older nations were relaxing on beach towels under an umbrella. France was reading the latest edition of _Vogue_, Prussia was attempting to get a tan with Spain (who really didn't need one) and Hungary, and England and China were simply kicking back and relaxing next to the ocean, occasionally checking to make sure none of the kids had drowned.

"You know, this is actually really nice," England admitted. France looked up from her magazine and tilted her sunglasses down, winking at her best frenemy.

"What did I tell you? The children are having fun, and they're not bothering us. What more could we ask for?"

"Perfect political leaders?" China offered.

"Better economies?" said Spain.

"A beer?" Prussia asked hopefully. France sighed and returned to her magazine just as America and Korea ran up, hauling a bucket full of sand between them.

"We're gonna have a sandcastle contest!" America announced proudly. "We need you guys to be the judges, 'kay?"

The six of them nodded slightly, Spain, Prussia, and Hungary still soaking up the sun. America and Korea grinned and ran off.

From what they could tell, America, Korea, Japan, Germany, and the Italies were participating, as Taiwan, Seychelles, and Canada were collecting shells. The six contestants split themselves up into three teams: America and Korea, Japan and Germany, and Romana and Veneziana. Some obscene remarks were shared between America and Romana, and even Japan said a few things (in Japanese, mind you) that should've remained unspoken.

Around an hour later, the sandcastles were finally done, just as Seychelles beat Taiwan and Canada in a swimming competition. The six older nations left their sanctuary and went to judge the creations.

America's and Korea's came first, a giant burger stuffed with what looked like kimchi, two very familiar flags waving on top.

"How is this a castle?!" England and China asked in unison. America and Korea grinned and shrugged. Prussia and Hungary applauded. Spain smiled, and France looked as if she was making a mental note about something.

Next was Japan's and Germany's, an enormous, incredibly meticulous sculpture of the world spinning on an axis. Prussia gave a low whistle, and Hungary snapped a picture. England, Spain, and France just gaped in shock at the sheer perfection of the model, and China clapped slowly.

Last came Veneziana's and Romana's, a (not unexpected) plate of sand-pasta with several sand-tomatoes on top. Being Italian, the sand-sculpture was incredibly made, and the sisters looked on proudly from the side as the judges admired it. When they had finished evaluating all three, they couldn't decide whose to choose.

"I think Japan and Germany were the obvious winners," China said.

"The awesome agrees!"

"I think Veneziana and Romana did the best," Hungary and Spain said simultaneously.

"It's easy to see that it was America and Korea," England argued. "Though it's obvious we're all going to argue for our own. And since France was the only one without a child who competed, I think she should decide."

France, put on the spot without warning, thought for a moment before her eyes drifted off towards something to the left. The five others turned their heads to look, catching sight of a huge, majestic castle being carefully created by two people in the distance. A single thought passed between their six minds, and they all broke into a sprint, stopping suddenly when they saw that the makers of the sandcastle were...

"Poland?"

"Lithuania?"

Two heads poked out from behind the castle's tiers, ready to fight to the death if needed. They relaxed when they saw who their visitors were.

"Oh. Like, hey! Welcome to Fort Polska!"

"You made this?" France asked, astounded. Poland and Lithuania nodded.

"All by ourselves!" The Slavic nation stepped out from behind her - ahem, his - masterpiece, revealing himself to be clad in a pair of pink swim trunks and a flowery pink rash guard. Lithuania was dressed similarly, only in blue. "Is it good?"

All six of them nodded wordlessly.

"That's it, Poland wins!" France exclaimed, throwing her hands up in defeat.

"Win? Cool! Like, what'd I win?"

France tapped her chin. "Hm...my D and G sunglasses."

"And the Chanel purse?" Poland encouraged. France glared at him.

"Fine."

Poland cheered and ducked back into his "Fort", just as all nine kids ran over to hear the verdict, which, unfortunately, England had been forced to deliver.

"Right, so, erm...the thing is...Poland won," she said hurriedly. For a moment, all of them were silent. Then all hell broke loose. Again.

America, Romana, and Korea took their buckets, marched over to the water, filled them up, and dumped them over Poland's head. Then, all nine of them proceeded to stomp the castle into bits, attack Poland with Nerf guns and sticks, and have what should really be described as a sand-ball fight.

Hungary, England, China, Spain, Prussia, and France slowly snuck away from the fray, back over to their beach mat. Hungary, Prussia, and Spain resumed their tanning session, France went back to her magazine, and China and England continued their relaxation.

"Should we stop them?" England asked, glancing over once at the battle going on fifty feet away. China shook her head. "They'll get tired eventually. And when they do, we'll get them ice cream and let them watch cartoons for the rest of the night. Pass the aspirin, please."

* * *

**Designing their bathing suits. I had too much fun doing that.**

**So...yeah. Nothing to say. Never fret, Poland gets his Chanel purse!**


	38. Mountain Dew

**I'm alive! I swear! I just went on this crazy oneshot kick and...yeah. But I'm back! Yay!**

**I'll shut up now.**

* * *

After the beach, everyone headed over to China's house for a sleepover. The adults immediately crashed in the living room (not before Prussia's complaints about "sun-burning her awesome"), and the kids managed to discover the leftover Mountain Dew from the karaoke night. Silly China. In five minutes, they had hauled all three boxes upstairs and locked themselves in Japan and Korea's room.

The first can was popped open and passed around, everyone taking a sip and handing it over to the next person until it was empty. That can was followed by another, and another, and another, until all three twenty-four packs were gone, the only remnants existing in a pile of crushed cans in the center of their circle.

North and South Italy had switched personalities, Veneziana cursing and threatening up a storm and munching on a random tomato, Romana "ve"ing happily and clinging to a flushed and confused Germany, who was swaying back and forth aimlessly.

America, Canada, Japan, and Korea were laughing and giggling nonstop at anything and everything anyone said, all flushed bright pink, while Seychelles and Taiwan discussed different fishing techniques that could also have doubled as flirting techniques. Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam were having a sword/lightsaber/paddle fight.

"Hey, you guys! Heeeeeyyy!" America drawled, giggling at nothing with Korea. "Let's play truth or dare! Get in a circle!"

"We're already in a circle, stupid," Veneziana growled.

"Right. Whoops!" America tittered. "Alright, who's got a bottle?"

"We can use the lightsaber!" Thailand hollered, throwing it at America and hitting her on the head. She didn't seem to notice and slid the "weapon" shut, placing it on the ground and spinning it so it landed on Japan.

"Okay, Japan! Pick someone to dare!" America ordered.

Japan looked around the circle at the different faces before settling on one. "Romana-chan, PG dare or PG-13 dare?"

"What happened to truth?" Canada slurred.

"There is no truth in war, soldier!" Vietnam exclaimed, pointing her paddle at Canada and turning her attention back to the others just as Romana said, "Ve~ PG, per fervore!"

Japan thought for a moment before laughing at nothing again and saying, "Okay, Romana-chan, you have to climb onto the ceiling fan and hang on it while singing 'I'm a Little Teapot'. Now go!"

"Okay~" Romana then proceeded to climb on top of the dresser, hop onto the fan, and sing "I'm a Little Teapot" before dropping onto the bed and staying there, giggling her head off, until Veneziana dragged her back into the circle. America spun the lightsaber again, this time landing on herself.

"Korea!" she cried, standing up and losing her balance for a moment before pointing an accusing finger at her friend. "Dare or dare?"

"Dare, da-ze!" Korea replied defiantly.

"Alright! I challenge you to a duel!"

"I accept your challenge!"

America kicked the lightsaber into her hand with her foot, grabbing a pair of sunglasses off the dresser and sliding them over her eyes before standing in a ready position. Korea nodded to Hong Kong, who threw the sword at her. She caught it with an original air of expertise and plopped a pair of cat ears (that she managed to pull of as intimidating and adorable at the same time) onto her head as she assumed her stance.

"Ready?" Canada asked, and both participants nodded. "Okay! The two of you will duel until the Mortal Kombat theme is finished. Is that understood?"

"Yessir!" America and Korea shouted, glaring fiercely at each other.

"Begin!" Canada exclaimed, blowing a whistle. Germany began playing the Mortal Kombat theme, and the two went at it for over four minutes, until the tip of the sword found it's way to America's throat.

"Korea wins!" Canada announced.

"Dueling was invented in Korea, da-ze!"

America took the walk of shame back to her seat and respun the bottle. This time, it landed on Germany, who wasted no time in stating, "We're reenacting 'The Lion King'! Vietnam's the singer-lady, Canada's Rafiki, Kuma-whatsit's Simba, and America and Japan are Mufasa and Sarabi. Go!"

Everyone assumed their positions (the bed was Pride Rock), and Vietnam began singing from the corner as Canada dramatically walked from the headboard to the edge of the bed, holding the very confused Kumajiro above her head as America and Japan looked on proudly. When Vietnam finished the song, the others, who represented the savannah animals, bowed.

Everyone reassumed their regular spots, and the lightsaber was spun once again, choosing the next victim: Veneziana.

"A'ight, bastards, potato-bastard here's gotta sing 'Call Me Maybe'. Go."

Always one to follow orders, Germany stood up as Hong Kong played the designated song.

"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so call me maybe!"

What did they learn that day? Germany can't pull off "Call Me Maybe".

They spun the mystical lightsaber of destiny yet again, landing on Seychelles, who promptly called Hong Kong's attention.

"I dare you to go set off some fireworks outside!"

Without having to be told twice, Hong Kong gathered up around two dozen little firework missiles and containers and ran outside, everyone else hot on his heels. He dug a pack of matches out of his pocket and arranged all the fireworks in a straight line, then lit the match and sprinted down the line, lighting all of them in succession.

Twenty four little boxes exploded into color, progressively getting better as they went along. Many "ooh"s and "aah"s were murmured as each pyrotechnic masterpiece went off, the last (and best) being a rainbow of colors that sent a ball of fire shooting up into the sky, only to explode and sprinkle little golden dust all over them. Romana laughed and clapped her hands happily, and America and Korea (unsuccessfully) attempted to fly.

The etherealness was short-lived, however, as the fireworks appeared to be the only thing that could've woken up the older nations, who ran outside as if the world was ending and they had one more minute to yell, "YOLO!" before they died.

"What the bloody hell are you doing?!"

"Hong Kong, I told you not to do that anymore!"

"Roma? Mi tomate, what happened to you?!"

"Canada, Seychelles, why are you so tipsy?"

"Kesesesese~ West got drunk, and it wasn't my fault~"

Hungary was completely silent, noticing Veneziana's change and choosing to pretend not to be there.

America turned to face England and waved happily at her sister. "Iggy, loooooooook~ Hong Kong has fire...works..."

All of a sudden, the American girl yawned and rubbed her eyes before collapsing on the grass right then and there, snoring loudly. Within the next minute, all twelve of them were snoozing on the grass while their guardians stood watching them, confused for a moment before opting to just go with it and carrying them upstairs.

The pile of 72 Mountain Dew cans in the corner silenced any questions they had.

* * *

**maplepancakes99, I hope you don't mind that I used your line :P**

**This chapter was inspired by the fact that I played truth or dare while drinking 2 liters of Mountain Dew today.**

**Happy weekend~**


	39. Guitar Hero

**I'm sorry this chapter is so short, but it's really just a filler before my YOLO chapter, coming on the 21st.**

**Crazy shit's gonna go down in the Chibiverse, I tell you. Craaaaazy. O.o**

**This chapter came from me playing mega-extensive amounts of Guitar Hero 3 yesterday :3**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

America, England, Spain, and Romana had been desperately trying to pass Guitar Hero 3 on expert for...five days now.

"Gyaah! This stupid game is busted!" Romana cursed, throwing the guitar down after her thirty-seventh attempt and burying her face in the sofa next to Spain.

"Iggy!" America whined, clutching her matron nation's sleeve. "I thought you were supposed to be good at guitar!"

"I am," England huffed. "But this is a video game. It's entirely different."

Spain nodded, taking up the controller. "Sí, playing guitar is muy fácil, but it's harder because it's a game."

America thought for a moment before brightening up. "Aha! I've got an idea! Let's call up Japan and Korea!"

"No," Romana spat. "We have to do this ourselves."

Spain clicked her tongue. "Don't be so rude, Roma. It wouldn't be wrong to ask for help from experts."

Five minutes later, China promised them that Japan and Korea would be there shortly.

Five more minutes later, the doorbell rang, just as Spain almost made it to the bridge of "Don't Look Back" before failing. It was all the Spanish woman could do not to go completely crazy and whip out her battle axe right then and there.

"You called, da-ze?" Korea asked with a smirk. America nodded sulkily.

"We suck at Guitar Hero."

"May I?" Japan requested politely, and Romana shoved the controller into her arms. England went off to make China tea.

Korea and Japan plopped down on the sofa.

"I do half, you do half?" Korea asked, and Japan nodded.

"Let me take care of the last one, though."

Japan started a new band with her and Korea's names as the title, and began working her way down the list with "Slow Ride" by Foghat.

**_Two hours later..._**

"Last song, da-ze," Korea stated simply, handing the controller back over to Japan, who cracked her knuckles and took hold of it. They had scored perfectly on every other song (on their first try, too), and England, China, Spain, America, and Romana were amazed. So amazed, in fact, that they were speechless as Japan selected the last song, "Through the Fire and Flames", and the loading screen read only, "Good luck" instead of its usual witty remark involving rock bands.

Japan ran her fingers down the buttons once to test them...

...before totally shredding. They couldn't even see her hands, they were moving so fast, and every note was hit with astonishing accuracy that shouldn't have come from someone below four feet tall.

The "Rock Meter" stayed eternally on green as Japan's hands flashed. She wore her usual apathetic expression as the notes flew by, each and every one having been hit.

When the song ended (perfectly, might I add), the six others applauded. Japan bowed slightly and smiled, wiping a bead of swear from her forehead.

"Uri nara mansae!" Korea cheered, hugging her sister. She turned to the four who had been struggling before and stuck her tongue out. "Remember, if you think you're good at something, there'll always be an Asian to show you up, da-ze!"

China thought for a moment. "I'd punish you if it wasn't true..."

England glared at her. "You can leave now."

* * *

**Ah, right, news! I'm now taking oneshot requests :D So just PM me if you have one. If you don't...you can PM me too, if you want. I don't discriminate.**

**If you do want me to write one, however, I'd like you to please keep in mind that it's sorta difficult for me to write pairings I don't ship. I will if I'm asked to, but...yeah.**

**Until the 21st, mis tomates~ Adios!**


	40. YOLO

**WARNING: INTENSE PRUHUN IN THIS CHAPTER. DON'T LIKE, TOO BAD.**

**Happy end-of-the-world! In two hours, that is. I say COME AT ME, BRO! I survived Y2K, this is nothing!**

**My school is so mean, they let us out for break the day before the world is supposed to end -_- Like, "Hey, you're gonna die, so take these midterms first!"**

**Anyway. I will take the blame for the sheer stupidity of this chapter.**

* * *

It was ten o'clock at night on December 20th, 2012, and Hell had frozen over.

Not really, but from the way everyone was acting, you would have thought so.

Prussia and England were totally convinced the world was going to end in an hour, Prussia because she has awesome intuition, England because she had been out reading the clouds and signs pointed to the inevitable apocalypse.

Thus, Spain, Prussia, France, Hungary, England, China, Romana, Veneziana, Seychelles, Canada, America, Germany, Japan, Korea, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam found themselves scrambling around China's house in a rather pointless attempt to live for as long as possible, gathering provisions and throwing them down into the basement.

"Provisions", however, had a very special meaning to everyone.

America, Korea, Prussia, Veneziana, China, Hong Kong, Japan, Thailand, and Romana were convinced the apocalypse was going to be zombie-related, so they were running around making everyone wear pots on their heads and carry some form of weapon. England's eyes widened when she saw America with an AK-47 strapped to her back.

"Bloody hell, America, where on Earth did you get that?!"

"Oh, this?" America grinned. "Switzerland gave it to me! He said...um..." She tapped her chin in thought then snapped her fingers. "Aha! He said, 'In case you ever have problems with England!'"

England paled and turned away. "Right then..." She could say nothing more, as Prussia threw a colander at her head and she had to catch it before it knocked her brains out.

Everyone else, while they believed in the apocalypse, hadn't specified what exactly they were expecting. Nevertheless, the BTT made sure to take all the alcohol they could get their hands on and send it down to the basement. Japan, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Thailand, Vietnam, and Korea had moved the Wii, Xbox, PS1, 2, and 3, GameCube, and pretty much every other gaming system in circulation and out. America and Romana were making a stockpile of guns and hammers and various types of knives in the corner, England was reciting spells, China was cooking mass amounts of food to last for quite a while, and Spain and France were checking up on the alcohol stash.

So overall, the preparations were going pretty well. So well, in fact, that they had finished in an hour (which was remarkable, really, considering how much they were gathering) and locked themselves in the basement, dressed in a mixture of kitchenware and actual armor. America and Korea had taken the liberty of building a room-sized fort (they had even blocked off the door with cement). England, China, Hungary, and Prussia were playing Risk to occupy their thoughts, which was getting quite intense, Spain and France were helping themselves to the Sangria, America, Japan, Romana, and Germany were playing Super Smash Bros., and the other kids were playing hide-and-seek. Eventually, the kids got bored and started using China's priceless collection of Hello Kitty merchandise for target practice, so they would be ready when the zombies showed up. China herself was too engulfed in taking over Russia to pay attention as bullets and arrows made their way into the head of her beloved, mouthless kittens.

Alas, it turned to 11:30. Risk wasn't going anywhere, France and Spain had run out of wine, and Hello Kitty was no more. All eighteen of them huddled together in a circle and braced themselves for the end before Prussia snapped her fingers, as if she had just remembered something.

"There's something awesome I need to do before I die!"

Hungary scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion. "What do you-?"

And with that, Prussia grabbed his shirt collar and kissed him shortly yet sweetly. The kids all yelled "Ewww!" and covered their eyes, Spain applauded, and France whistled.

"Oh, right, one more thing!" she said to the still-shocked Hungary. She slapped him across the face once, sighed contentedly, and leaned back. "There. Now I can die awesomely."

China and England exchanged a look and shrugged, just as the house began shaking and America, Korea, and Veneziana screamed.

"IT'S STARTING, DA-ZE!"

"WE'RE GONNA DIE!"

"VE, I DON'T WANT ZOMBIES!"

Japan stood up and swung her machine gun over her shoulder, keeping her wits about her through the tremor. "Saa, it's now or never! Assume your ready positions, men!"

Orders were obeyed as a bright light appeared out of nowhere in the air above them and spread, becoming a figure dressed in a war-skirt and headdress. When Spain saw who it was, her eyes widened and she choked back a scream and hid behind France.

The figure spoke, and everyone listened.

"I am Moctezuma."

"Mocte-who-the-hell-ma?"

"Moctezuma," he repeated, noticing Spain behind France and apparently recognizing her even as a female. "Spain, you can come out. I hold no hard feelings."

Reluctantly, Spain came out of her hiding spot and Veneziana asked, "Big Sister Spain, who's Doctor Zuma?"

"Moctezuma," Spain corrected, "was a leader that I- er, that my people...ahem."

She didn't finish her sentence and turned back to Moctezuma. "Why are you here?"

"I've come to make an announcement regarding the apocalypse."

"Crap, he's gonna kill us!" America shouted, holding up her gun and firing a shot, shrieking in terror when it went through him. "OHMYGOD HE'S A GHOST IGGY SAAAAAAAAAAAVE ME!"

She jumped into England's lap and refused to show her face while Spain said, "But...you were an Aztec, not a Maya..."

"That's true," Moctezuma replied. "But the Mayas are receiving excessive amounts of sacrifices, and they got caught up in learning how to use the iPhones people threw into their fireplaces. So they sent me instead."

"What's your announcement?" Germany asked.

"The world...is not going to end."

A groan passed among all of them, and Japan sighed.

"I guess we have to move all the games back upstairs..."

"Dammit!" America cursed. "Now I can't go apeshit on zombie asses!"

"Zombies have asses?" Romana questioned.

"Allow me to finish," Moctezuma went on. "The world will not end...yet. Someday, it will, but that day will not come for a long, long while. At the moment, remember to keep your people united against the common enemy."

All of them exchanged a confused look.

"What's the common enemy?" Hong Kong asked.

"NARWHALS!" Moctezuma cried before disappearing in a final burst of light that would have blinded them all if they hadn't shielded their eyes, exactly as the clock turned to midnight. Hungary cleared his throat and glanced at Prussia, blushing slightly.

"Well...this is awkward."

Prussia turned bright red. "We'll talk about it later. For now, we need to assemble a group to eliminate all narwhals from the face of the Earth."

"Can I use a gun?" America asked.

"Sure, kid."

"AWESOME! Let's go kill us some sea-unicorns!"

* * *

**Who wants to come murder some narwhals with me? XD**

**I have absolutely nothing against narwhals. If you kill one, I'm not responsible.**


	41. It's Christmas!

**Merry Christmas, guys! Enjoy~**

* * *

'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through China's house, the chibi nations were running around like decapitated chickens. Frankly, the elder nations didn't care. They had enough eggnog and vodka (Russia's Christmas gift to them) to simply be, well, merry.

The week before, they had all written letters to Santa with pleas (or demands) for presents. Unknown to the little countries, the mail had been redirected to Finland, who had, coincidentally, just set out to bring cheer to the children of the world.

Thus, the little nations were playing the card game Assassin and taking swigs of Mountain Dew to stay awake for Santa while the older nations turned Korea's verbal tick into a drinking game.

"Alright, the awesome me has an idea! Every time Korea says 'da-ze', we take a shot. Whoever passes out last wins, even though we all know none of you can beat my awesomeness."

"Bloody wanker, just watch me!"

"Oui, I agree with Angleterre, you're on! Winner gets a day off next week!"

And so it began as Korea dealt out the cards and the other little nations closed their eyes.

"Assassin, open your eyes, da-ze."

Six glasses were set down on the table as Canada's eyes opened.

"Who do you want to kill, da-ze?"

Another clamor, and the mischievous gleam in Canada's eyes was blatantly evident when she pointed at America. South Korea nodded.

"Assassin, close your eyes. Angels, open your eyes, da-ze."

Seychelles and Taiwan opened their eyes, and Korea asked, "Who do you want to save, da-ze?"

The two looked around before deciding upon Veneziana and Vietnam. South Korea tried hard not to scoff.

"Angels, close your eyes. Police, open your eyes, da-ze."

Thailand and Germany opened their eyes.

"Who do you wish to convict, da-ze?"

The two exchanged a glance before simultaneously pointing to Romana. Korea nodded in acknowledgement.

"Everyone, open your eyes, da-ze."

They all did just that, and South Korea sighed dramatically.

"You know, da-ze, there are some things in life that happen that are beyond our comprehension, da-ze. And so it is now that we say goodbye to one of our dear friends, da-ze. America, it was nice knowing you."

America's eyes widened in disbelief and tears came to her eyes. "I...I'm dead? What? No! Noooooooooooooooooo! Iggy, they killed me!" The girl twisted around from her spot on the floor to see the (very drunk) older nations. "Iggy...?"

As of that moment, actually, England was dancing the Irish jig while Hungary played the bagpipes and the others clapped along, laughing for no reason. And then Spain stood up and began tangoing with her, causing the music to change. And THEN the DJ table from the karaoke night appeared and Hong Kong and Thailand somehow ended up behind it blasting "Disco Inferno" mixed with Riverdance mixed with salsa music mixed with the German Sparkle Party song. It was really quite an interesting mix.

And then Finland (literally) fell down the chimney and wondered what the Christmas was going on. America was the first to see him and glomp him to oblivion, soon followed by everyone else.

"SANTA! What'd ya bring us? Show the presents!"

Finland smiled and slung his sack off of his shoulder, opening it up and rummaging through it.

"Aha! For America, here are those Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles masks."

He handed her the gift box and she cried out in delight, giving him a huge hug and far too many thank-you's.

"For Romana, a year supply of tomatoes, and for Veneziana, a year supply of pasta. I couldn't fit them in the sack, so they'll be here later, ja?"

Romana and Veneziana nodded and said thanks before joining America.

"For Canada, a new hockey set, and for Seychelles, a state-of-the-art, one-of-a-kind fishing rod!"

And so it went on. South Korea received a "certificate of authenticity" for everything, so now, technically, everything did originate in Korea. Japan got a huge pack of limited edition Pokémon and Yu-Gi-Oh! cards, and Taiwan got a sushi-making kit (to impress Japan). Germany received a puppy, Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam got an even better DJ set because, according to Finland, "they would need it far more often than they should have."

And, before he disappeared into the fireplace, Finland pulled one more thing out of his sack, a little glowing crystal ball.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" he shouted, throwing the ball into the middle of the room and dashing before it exploded into light.

**The next morning...**

"Blimey, my head..." England sat up and rubbed the back of his head.

Wait.

HIS head.

He jumped out of bed and looked in the mirror.

"It's over! I'm a male again! AMERICA! America, wake up!"

Said colony trudged into the doorway, rubbing his sleepy eyes. That's right, HIS.

"What's up, Iggy? Somethin' happen?"

"No, git, you're a boy again!"

America's eyes widened and he looked at himself and squealed. "ALRIGHT! That's awesome! It's a Christmas miracle!"

England went and picked him up, lifting him onto his shoulders. The littler boy laughed and hugged his guardian nation.

"Merry Christmas, Iggy."

"Merry Christmas, love."

* * *

**YAY, HAPPY ENDINGS!**

**And now they're boys again. I'LL MISS MY GIRLS SO MUCH ;A;**


	42. Mini-Golf

**OHMYGOSHI'MSOSORRYFORNOTUPDATINGINFORE VER**

**I didn't even do a New Year's thing OTL**

**Forgive me...**

* * *

After they had gotten over the thrill of returning to their old selves - and after Hungary had beat the crap outta Prussia for kissing her, then proceeded to kiss him herself, very much to the younger nations' disgust - they went out for a celebratory round of mini-golf, with many promises that not a single butt would remain unkicked. Vietnam, Thailand, and Hong Kong couldn't have cared less, so they agreed to keep score.

When they got to the mini-golf course (pirate-themed, much to Spain and England's delight), they picked out clubs and balls and proceeded to the first hole, where America, Romano, and South Korea had an argument over who would go first, an argument which Canada won when he took his golf ball and putted it straight into the hole while they were fighting. After him went Japan, then Germany, then Veneziano, then Seychelles, then Taiwan, before the three of them finally noticed.

"Hey, dudes, not cool!"

"Bastards, I'll send the mafia after you!"

"I'm still gonna win, da-ze!"

Thus, the three decided it would be a brilliant idea to all putt at the same time. The other young nations moved on to the next hole, not even bothering to wait for them.

When they did leave, however, the older countries took their opportunity to play, with England and Spain having a reenactment of the Spanish Armada.

"Fusososososo~" Spain chuckled darkly, swinging his club like the battle axe he had back in the day. "I won't lose this time, Inglaterra."

England smirked. "We'll see about that, Carriedo," he taunted, swinging HIS club like his old sword. China cleared his throat.

"Are you guys going to stop acting like children anytime soon, or are we going to have to just go on without you?"

England and Spain said nothing for the entire time it took them to both achieve holes-in-one, after which they started their "battle" all over again, until Hungary smacked them both over the head with her frying pan. She then produced a pair of brass knuckles and held her fist up menacingly.

"I will use these if I have to. Understand?"

"Yes ma'am," they said simultaneously. Of course, their obedience didn't last for long, but Hungary bided her time. Besides, she had to worry about kicking Prussia, France, and China's asses.

**_Meanwhile, with the little nations..._**

America and Romano were living out a similar rivalry to their guardians, with a dash of South Korea sprinkled in. The mediator for them, however, was Germany, and they were currently on the seventh hole.

"HAHAHAHA! Mini-golf originated in South Korea, da-ze!"

"Bastards, all of you! I'll kick your damn asses straight to Hell!"

"Dude, it takes skill to curse three times in one sentence."

"Ve~ This is fun!"

"ALL OF YOU IDIOTS SHUT UP!"

Japan was watching amusedly from afar with Canada, Taiwan, and Seychelles.

"D'you think they'll ever stop?" Canada asked, a hint of worry in his voice.

"Probably not," Seychelles answered flatly.

"Unless... I have an idea," Japan told them, and he called Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam over for a group huddle.

**_Back with the older morons- er, nations..._**

France and China had become spectators/scorekeepers to the game that had become a near bloodbath between Prussia, Hungary, Spain, and England.

"It's a good thing no one else is here..." China muttered.

"Oui," France agreed. "They would have scared off everyone within a mile of here."

And it was true. Prussia and Hungary were having a playful sword fight with their golf clubs while England and Spain were having a really intense, potentially lethal sword fight with their golf clubs, all four of them yelling colorful insults in their various languages.

"Hey!" China yelled over to them. "Are the four of you going to actually play the game?"

"No!" Spain yelled.

"In your dreams, China!" England shouted as he parried a blow from Spain.

"Nem!" Hungary called back, scraping her hair out of her eyes.

"Nein! Not in a million years!" Prussia replied.

"That settles that, then," France sighed. China nodded.

"Would you bring the kids home when they're done, then?" China asked. When Hungary stopped for a second to say yes, China and France left the mini-golf course.

**_Con los países pequeños..._**

At long last, they reached the last hole, and Japan's plan could be implemented when all the golf balls were gone. Of course, a fight could still break out with the clubs, but the somewhat sane nations crossed their fingers in hopes that that wouldn't happen.

"Alright, dudes, who won?" America asks eagerly, pushing Romano out of the way and getting into a fight with him when the Italian shoved him back. Japan sweatdropped.

"Um...hai...the winner was-whoops!" At that moment, Japan "accidentally" dropped the scorecard on the ground, where it then fluttered into the small lake in the center of the mini-golf course. America and Veneziano gasped and South Korea fell to his knees crying, "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Romano began cursing again and Japan put on his best innocent face.

"Gomen na sai, the wind blew it away from me."

"Ve~ Now we'll never know who won," Veneziano whined. Germany made eye contact with Japan and seemed to catch on.

"Oh, ja! I mean, that's too bad. Let's just go home, then, after we find the adults."

They set off then, in search of their guardians.

"I totally won," America muttered, and South Korea nearly tackled him.

"Shut up, da-ze! It was all me, and you kn- Oh my God..."

At that moment, they walked in on the ongoing skirmish between the four remaining older countries. The fighters didn't notice the children approach them, even when they began screaming their names. Eventually, Germany got fed up and climbed a couple of fake barrels and yelled, "HEY, CUT IT OUT!"

That got their attention, and they stopped battling, all of them panting heavily.

"Oh, hey, West!" Prussia greeted nonchalantly. Germany silenced him with a glare.

"Where are China and France?" he demanded.

"They left," Spain answered cheerfully, as if he wasn't covered in golf-club-induced bruises. "So we'll take all of you home."

"Right..." England agreed. "Let's go, then."

He led them all back to the beginning of the course, but not before glaring at Spain and mouthing, "This isn't over."

* * *

**WHOO, MINI-GOLF!**

**Oh, and for everyone who reads this fic and likes humorously awesome fanfictions about the personifications of states and stuff, check out Blueninjamanga22's story "United We Stand". You'll love it, I promise.**


	43. Twin Swap

**Eh heh...another slow update. I hope they'll speed up after this, but I don't want to break any promises, so I'll just leave it at that.**

**Shoutout to silverheartlugia2000 for the chapter suggestion!**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

After everyone had calmed down from mini-golf, the Italy brothers came together for a playdate and had a rather devilish idea while they were playing Go Fish.

"Ve~ Fratello, do you want to play a joke on everyone?"

Romano looked up from his hand of cards. "A joke? What kind?"

Veneziano actually opened his eyes and grinned mischievously at his brother. "We're going to pretend to be each other. Doesn't that sound fun?"

Romano placed his cards face down and looked at his brother with a new interest. "How the hell do you plan to do that?"

Veneziano pulled out a notepad and pen. "Well..."

Three hours later, Spain decided to take "Romano" (played for now by Veneziano) back home, as it was getting rather late. Hungary was left with the northern Italy brother, who she turned to with a smile when the other two had gone.

"Well, Veneziano, what would you like for dinner? Pasta, as usual?"

The real Romano cleared his throat and managed to match his brother's voice as he replied, "Erm...I mean, ve. No, bel- I mean, Miss Hungary. Can I have some tomatoes?" Then, for good measure, he added in another "ve", looking up at Hungary somewhat anxiously to tell whether or not she had bought it. To his relief, her smile stayed and she even laughed.

"Little Roma's rubbing off on you, hm? Lucky for you, Big Brother Spain left us a basket of tomatoes. Come on in the kitchen."

She extended her hand to him, and he took it gladly, hiding a sly smile at his new, female caregiver.

This may work out to his advantage.

**_Meanwhile, with Spain and Veneziano..._**

Spain was surprised and a bit worried at the fact that his little colony hadn't said anything, let alone insulted him, the entire drive home. He had just looked out the window and swung his legs happily. Which was concerning, because Romano was never happy.

"Roma, are you feeling okay?" he had asked, which had seemed to snap Romano out of whatever it was he had been thinking. His scowl reappeared, although the Spaniard couldn't help but notice that it looked a little forced.

"Of course I'm okay!" "Romano" snapped. And afterwards he added a quiet and reluctant, "b-bastard..."

When they got home, Spain asked Romano what he wanted to eat, assuming without second thought that he wanted tomatoes. When his answer came, Spain's confusion doubled.

"Um, no tomatoes. Pasta, per fervore."

Spain scratched his head but obliged to "Romano's" wishes, brushing off the quiet "ve"s he let out while he ate as nothing more than an influence from his brother. He had been around him all day, and when Japan had done that...

Spain shuddered at the memory.

**_Back with Hungary and Romano, circa 3:30 AM..._**

Hungary was awoken from her light slumber by a soft knock at her door. She sat up and blinked a few times to regain her senses before calling, "Come in!"

Romano (still disguised as Veneziano) cracked open the door and peeked in. "Hungary?"

Hungary switched on her bedside lamp. "Veneziano? Is that you?"

Romano nodded. "Can I sleep here? I, erm, had a nightmare. Ve."

Hungary smiled sleepily. "Of course you can," she yawned.

Romano practically jumped into the bed beside her and snuggled into the covers. Hungary gave him a short kiss on the head before wishing him sweet dreams and falling back asleep. Romano smiled and silently applauded himself for successfully getting in bed with a girl.

Sort of.

**_The next day..._**

It was a world meeting day, and, since they'd run out of options, the older nations had no choice but to bring the younger ones along. They ran around in the hallways, playing tag and hide-and-seek and duck-duck-goose and such. Veneziano and Romano let their comrades in on their scheme.

At the actual conference, Spain made a point of sitting next to Hungary. He had a few questions to ask her.

"Hola, Liza. Can I ask you something?"

Hungary looked up from the paperwork she was studying and nodded. "Sure. What's wrong?"

He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Has Veneziano been acting...different?"

Hungary tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Now that you mention it, since you left yesterday, he has been a bit more...clingy. Why do you ask?"

Spain gave a small shrug. "I've noticed a difference in Romano since yesterday. It looks like he has to try to be mean. Usually his insults come naturally. And I thought I heard him saying 've' yesterday...and he actually cleaned well. I'm concerned."

"What do you think we should do?" Hungary asked, a sense of nervousness coming over her.

"No sé..." Spain replied, running his hands through his hair to help him think. His thought process was interrupted, however, by England and France of all people.

"Oi," England called over from the opposite side of the table. "Spain, Hungary, we know what's wrong with them." France nodded in agreement and Spain and Hungary perked up.

"You do? What is it?" Hungary prompted.

"It appears they've done what would be properly referred to as a 'twin-swap'," England explained. "Long story short, they're messing with you."

"Oui. Little Canada and Amérique have done it to us before," France added.

England smiled sympathetically. "Children are sneaky little devils, mates. I suggest you devise a plan to expose them, and quick."

The next five minutes were spent coming up with said plan, before the lot of children burst through the door. America had sprained his ankle and, being kids, they all had to come to take him to England. Romano somehow snuck over to Hungary and put on his best puppy-dog face.

"Hungary?"

She looked down at him, now clearly seeing Romano now that she knew it was him, and smiled. "What's wrong, _Veneziano_?"

"I hurt my lip," Romano explained, hiding his smirk. "Can you kiss it better?"

Hungary, however, was also hiding a smirk as she slid her hand into the pocket of her coat and closed her fingers around a certain type of red fruit. "Sure, let me just-"

She grabbed the tomato and threw it across the room, and "Veneziano" immediately bounded after it, sliding and catching it before it hit the ground. In the process, his wig had fallen off. A collective gasp passed around the room as Denmark screamed (rather like a girl, it might be added) and Ukraine fainted. Romano took a moment to realize what had happened before letting out a beautiful string of curse words. Spain shook his head in disappointment.

"Romano, you're grounded," he said sternly.

Romano whined, "It was all Veneziano's idea!" and Veneziano burst into tears and threw off his wig.

"Mi dispiace! I only wanted to play a joke, ve, I'm sorry!"

Hungary gave him a hug, but still told him he was grounded. America and Canada patted their backs in sympathy.

"Don't worry, a month goes by really quickly!" Canada reassured them when they were back in the hallway. Romano bit into the tomato angrily and Veneziano hiccuped in response.

* * *

**So I spent my entire day watching little kids' shows with my sister and playing various Legend of Zelda games. It was awesome, but I figured I'd might as well write something.**

**Oh, right, I probably should've mentioned this a loooooooong time ago, but Poland's guide has been up for a while. Check it out if you're interested!**

**Stay psycho,**

**Captain**

**P.S. Shoutout to Blueninjamanga22 for my sign-off idea :3**


	44. Boredom

**WARNING****: If you haven't seen the anime Lucky Star, I suggest searching "Motteke! Sailor Fuku" in YouTube and watching the video. Also, if you haven't seen High School Musical, you may be a little confused.**

**So basically, I've spent the past two days listening to Jesse McCartney songs and pretending all of them are dedicated to me. I'm a pathetic excuse for a human being. OTL**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

England and China were being forced to attend a private meeting, and, since England had absolutely no faith in America's sense of responsibility (or lack of), he dropped him off at China's house, since Hong Kong, Vietnam, and Thailand were more trustworthy than anyone else. This, of course, meant that those three told their "charges" not to kill each other or anyone else and left to play DDR.

The real problem wasn't that they were going to destroy anything, though, it was that America, Korea, and Japan were bored out of their minds as soon as England and China left.

"Soooo...whaddaya wanna do, da-ze?"

America shrugged, lying on his stomach on Japan's bed. Japan paused the PS3 and set down the controller.

"We could have a random dance party," America suggested, propping himself up and sitting Indian-style.

"What songs did you have in mind, America-kun?"

America tapped his chin in thought. "...Jesse McCartney?"

Japan and Korea exchanged a look before shaking their heads. America pouted but said nothing.

"We could reenact something," Japan offered.

"Like what?" America asked, his voice muffled by the pillow once more.

"Ooh! I know, da-ze! Let's do the Motteke dance!"

Japan and America looked at each other and shrugged.

"Alright."

Japan went into his closet and dug out three of the cheerleader uniforms and six pom-poms. After they had changed, Japan started the song, and America began singing.

"Aimai san-senchi sora punitte koto kai-"

"Cho!" Japan and Korea said together.

"Rappingu ga seifuku da furitte koto kai-"

"Puu!" the two Asians interrupted again. Then, all together, they sang, "Ganbaccha? Yacchccha? Sonto kyaachi ando ririsu yo! Ase! Ase! No tanima ni darling darling PLEASE!"

**_One overly-peppy/nonsensical anime opening and costume change later..._**

"Well, that was fun," Japan remarked as he folded away the cheer leading uniforms and resumed his position on his beanbag chair.

"Now what, da-ze?" Korea asked excitedly.

America snapped his fingers. "I've got it! Let's watch a movie!"

Japan and Korea tilted their heads simultaneously.

"Which movie, da-ze?"

America grinned devilishly and held up a DVD case. "High School Musical. Three."

Korea and Japan nodded and clapped their hands in approval as America popped the disc in the PS3.

Within minutes, Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam were there, and all six of them were singing and dancing along to the movie. It went without saying that America was Troy, and Japan had taken on the role of Gabriella by bringing out his best Hatsune Miku voice. Korea was Chad, Hong Kong was Taylor, Vietnam was Sharpay, Thailand was Ryan, and they filled in the missing roles as they went along.

When THAT was over, England and China still hadn't returned, and they had no idea what to do. Hong Kong, Thailand, and Vietnam had gone back to their DDR tournament, and Korea, America, and Japan faced a single option (because that's all they could think of): They had to form a band.

Thus, with America on guitar and vocals, Korea on drums, and Japan on bass, they started their first practice in China's basement, singing "You're Gonna Go Far, Kid", a song all three of them knew well.

Of course, England and China had to walk in right when the chorus began and America sang, "Now dance, fucker, dance!"

And just like that, their band had broken up. They were, however, already organizing a comeback tour, though England didn't hesitate to point out that they had nothing to come back to. After that, the three of them just went to the corner and sulked until they fell asleep.

* * *

**That's that! It's shorter than usual. Oh well.**

**Stay psycho,**

**Captain ;)**


	45. Breaking the Habit

**In light of the season 5 premiere, I felt the need to update. For all us Hetalians, this is a big deal.**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

It came to all of the nations' attentions at a world meeting (one that the little countries were actually allowed and required to attend) that they all had really awful habits that they should have been working harder to break. Of course, it wasn't sugar-coated as nicely as that.

"You know why nothing ever gets done?" England scoffed. "You're all a bunch of brainless wankers."

Prussia's eye twitched. "Are you calling the awesome me brainless? At least we're not soulless like SOME people." He shot a pointed glare at Hungary, who rolled her eyes.

"Narcissism is hated by everyone. So are narcissists."

China "oooooh"ed, but Prussia soon turned on him.

"And you, you think you're so much better than all of us, don't you? Unawesome pansy."

"Who are you calling a pansy?!" China shouted, standing up and banging his hands on the table. "The one who provides you all with your free labor, that's who! What about the Frenchman who can't keep his pants on for more than five minutes at a time?"

"How rude, Chine!" France sniffed indignantly. "I'm not a stripper! The last time I took my pants off was to change this morning! At least I am not an airhead like Spain!"

"Damn straight," Romano agreed, causing Germany to roll his eyes.

"You could stop cursing so much, you know."

"Hey, shut up! I could stop whenever the hell I wanted."

"Ve~ How about now, then, fratello?"

"I said anytime I wanted, bastard. And what I do is none of the potato's business anyway. What about you, do you even have a brain?"

Veneziano's eyes teared up, and he began crying. "M-Mi d-dispiace f-fratello! I'll tr-try to be sm-smarter, I pr-promise!"

America laughed, and Canada turned to him with a quite uncharacteristic glare.

"You know, you could stop butting into everyone else's business. And getting them all to blame me for what you do, and talking so loud, and eating so much, and...you know."

America stared at his brother, aghast, before tears began forming in his eyes as well.

"AT LEAST I DON'T STUFF MY FACE WITH SYRUP AND PANCAKES AND TALK TO A BEAR WHO DOESN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME!" he yelled before running to England, sobbing. Prussia scoffed.

"Don't go to the Empire, he's got no heart."

"I do too!" England argued, patting America's back in sympathy. "What have you ever done for your little brother, besides getting him drunk off his ass?"

"Hey, I've done a lot for West! I picked him up after Francey-Pants-"

"DON'T FINISH THAT SENTENCE!" France interrupted, almost in tears. "Veneziano is in the room!"

Everyone, big and small, turned to look at the still-sniffling little Italian, who shrunk down in his seat.

"Wh-Why are you all staring at me like that...? Hungary, I'm sc-scared..."

Hungary walked over and scooped him up in her arms, shushing him quietly.

"Shh, calm down, Veneziano. We'll tell you when you're older, okay?"

Veneziano nodded and buried his face in her dress.

"Secrets originated in South Korea, da-ze!"

"No, they weren't!" Japan exclaimed, standing up and surprising everyone in the room as he jabbed his finger at Korea. "NOTHING originated in Korea, except for kimchi, which no one even likes but you! Just stop talking for once!"

Korea opened and closed his mouth, his eyes starting to water. "Your anime sucks, da-ze, and so does J-pop and Pocky! K-pop and Yan-Yan are so much better, just stop trying, okay?!"

Japan pulled out his katana, and just like that, things went from verbal violence to physical violence. Hungary was chasing Prussia with her frying pan, China had his wok and was fighting Spain, who had his axe. England was about to engage in a fist-fight with France, while Canada was wrestling with America. Japan and Korea were sparring, Japan using his karate and katana skills, Korea performing excellent tae kwon do techniques. Romano had gone into mafia mode and was screaming various expletives and obscenities at Germany, while the other nation ran for his life.

All the while, Seychelles, Taiwan, and Vietnam were discussing hairstyles, and Hong Kong and Thailand were trading Yu-Gi-Oh cards, not caring about what was going on around them. In the end, it was the least-likely country who ended it.

"ZITTO!" Veneziano almost roared from under the table, where he had taken cover. Everyone stopped and watched him crawl out from beneath it and climb on top of it. "Everybody needs to stop! We were supposed to discuss the world's problems, not make them worse! It was our first world meeting, and all of you ruined it!" He was nearly in tears again, and everyone holding them lowered their weapons as Veneziano continued.

"Sure, we all have our faults, but that doesn't mean we have to fix them! We are who we are, and it doesn't matter, because we all have to work together if we want to see the world become a better place."

When he had finished, they all broke out in applause and cheers.

"YOU'RE AWESOME!" Prussia shouted.

"You go, dude!"

"Sehr gut, Veneziano, I didn't know you had that in you."

"Very good, Veneziano-kun, I'm glad you were here."

In the end, the meeting ended with all of them in a group hug, much to England's apparent chagrin, but they all knew he secretly didn't hate any of them.

Probably.

* * *

**So, yeah! That's that. Happy 25th, go celebrate season 5 with tons of fics and fanart. Me, I'll be on YouTube and tumblr. At the same time.**

**Also, I'm sorry to say, but this fic is nearing its end. In fact, it's probably over. Like, now. I miiiiiiiiiight write another chapter in the future, but that's a big if. But hey, I've still got my other guides going on! And who knows, I could come back and revive this one in a couple of months.**

**For now, it's complete.**

**Stay psycho (and awesome),**

**Captain *:.｡****. o(≧▽≦)o .｡****.:* **


	46. The REAL End

**So I felt bad for not really ending this fic officially. Here is the OFFICIAL ending.**

**Enjoy, guys, and I just want to let you all know that you're amazing people for getting through forty-six chapters of my insanity. I love you all.**

* * *

Just like that, France, Spain, Prussia, China, and Hungary found themselves back at England's house, exactly where they had started all those chapters ago. The kids were playing upstairs, and the six of them were enjoying some tea.

"You know," Spain started, "this was really fun, no?"

"Is it really over so soon?" France asked wistfully. Prussia sniffled and wiped a tear. Hungary put an arm on shoulder.

"Idióta, are you crying?"

"Hell no!" Prussia exclaimed, pulling his bangs down over his eyes. "The awesome can't cry! I'm just...proud that West is all grown up now."

China did a spit take. "When did they grow up?!"

"Just look at them, China," England said sadly. "They're starting to stand on their own. They're not going to need us around for much longer. They'll grow up to be just as great, if not greater than us."

Prussia scoffed. "Impossible. I'm awesome."

"Angleterre is right, though. And I hate that I have to say that. We have had some fun times together, though, while they were young. We have taught them all we know."

"Which isn't much," Hungary pointed out.

"Still, though," China sighed. "I'm going to miss all of us doing crazy things together. I wonder what will happen in the future?"

England snorted. "Watch Russia grow up to be some great superpower."

They all burst out laughing.

"And...and..." Spain said between laughs. "England and I have some big sea war and I LOSE."

This time, England didn't join in the laughter.

"And what if Prussia becomes a part of Germany?" Hungary giggled. "That would be so embarrassing!"

"Imagine little Japan and Germany and Veneziano waging a huge war!" France chortled. "That would be something, non?"

"How about if the British Empire falls?" Prussia grinned. "That would be something to celebrate."

"All of you can go to Hell," England commented.

"Oh, oh, oh! What if we invent some sort of ultimate weapon?" Hungary asked with a sadistic smile that made Prussia wince.

"You mean, something better than cannons?" England questioned. Hungary nodded.

"Something that could take out entire cities in one go."

The five males stared at her.

"Hungary, should we be scared?" China asked.

"Probably," answered Prussia. "But you know what hasn't happened yet? America hasn't rebelled. I was awesomely expecting that."

"Shut it, you git!" England hissed. "He'll hear you, and then I'll be fucked!"

"Hey, no fucking unless I'm involved somehow!" France ordered. England shuddered.

"Anyway. Don't talk so loud."

The Bad Touch Trio blinked, then all three of them grinned.

"We'd be his main supporters, you know," France said nonchalantly.

"Sí, I would be more than willing to assist him~"

"Kid needs some training, kesesesese~ I could do it."

England's eyes widened. "Don't you dare. I'll get Hungary to castrate all of you."

Just then, the doorbell rang. England went to answer it, and in walked Poland and Lithuania.

"Like, hey you guys! Where're we, like, going next?"

"Nowhere, Poland," England state firmly. Poland tilted his head questioningly.

"Like, what do you mean? Let's go, like, bowling or something cool like that! Get the little kids and, like, let's go!"

"We're DONE, Poland," Hungary told him. Poland pouted, tears coming to his eyes.

"Well, that, like, sucks," he sniffled. "Come on Liet, let's, like, get out of here."

Just as the door shut behind him, "Riot" began blasting through the house, and the children all ran down the stairs with a battle-cry, riding broomsticks instead of horses.

"LET'S START A RIOT!" America shouted, holding up the kitchen spoon he was using as a sword.

"A RIOT!" the others echoed, and they proceeded to pounce on their guardians and hit them with various kitchenware. When they had managed to land quite a few bruises on them, they all immediately fell asleep.

"Can that be considered a revolution?" Hungary asked, straightening out her apron.

"I suppose so..." Spain answered, sniffing and blowing his nose with his handkerchief.

Then, for the last time, the six older nations watched their little children sleep before they let them go.

"You know," England smiled through his silent tears. "The kids are alright."

And all of them agreed.

...

_The end._


End file.
